How to stop a female colleague from harassing me.
Guest
(Querist) 11 June 2014
This query is : Resolved
I work in a govet school under delhi administration as a hindi teacher.
there is one colleague who passes personal comments on my dresses that they are too fashionable for a teacher to wear(i wear salwar suits),on my jewellery on my kajal,on me applying nailpolish,etc.many teachers in my school come daily in anarkalis,jeans with kurti,high heels,open hair,long earrings,etc etc.but she never criticises them becoz they are her frenz.
she also interferes and tries to put my views down when i'm having a conversation with any teacher even though it's none of her business.
after school,we use the same cab to reach our homes.
its too hot in delhi summers.she always occupies the front seat (which is comfortable)so that i cant sit there by reaching slightly before school bell rings.i have a health issue becoz of which i need to sit at the front seat so that i can stretch my legs.talking to the driver doesnt help since he too fears her.
likewise there are many more incidents where she does or says things that trouble me or defame me.but she does them so subtly that nobody knows.
for example once i was wearing a neon shade salwar suit.
on the same day in our cab she said that she hates neon colours because they irritate her eyes.on questioning her,she fought that she was talking generally.
i am facing deep anxiety due to her bullying behavior.
i have tried to reason with her many times but she's too quarrelsome.
i tell principal but she does not take my complaint seriously and tells me to take a transfer.
now what am i to do?please dont suggest me a transfer.
Dr J C Vashista
(Expert) 11 June 2014
Duplicacy of the query in forum as well as with experts, please see my reply in forum.
Anirudh
(Expert) 11 June 2014
You say that you are a Teacher. But to me you don't seem to have come out from out from childhood!
Why do you bother what anybody else says about you? When somebody says that one is irritated with pink, why do you assume that she is referring to your colour of the dress. Even if it is so, so be it. Why don't you leave it to her and keep quiet. Only when you try to say something she feels happy and picks up quarrel, which you do not like. Please keep yourself above such trivial matters. Do not react. Then it will be her turn to ask you why you are not talking. Say, I have headache!! These things being a major you should be able to manage. Maintain your silence, when anybody asks why are you silent, say all of you are very senior to me I am learning, I am yet to learn dhunia dari, it is better to listen than to unnecessarily talk especially when I have to learn a lot.
(By saying this, what you do is you are not unnecessarily losing your words, rather by being silent, you are not giving away your views! That itself will stop further unnecessary talk. Even if that talk is critical of you, keep quiet. You will be the winner and not loser. Only if you think that for words to word you have to reply, or you have to share it with some of your other colleagues then the trouble will start. You don't even know whether or not the colleague with whom you privately shared your views about anybody else will reach the very same persons!!)
Avoid being a child, come of age!
Devajyoti Barman
(Expert) 11 June 2014
These are general happenings quite common in working environment.
You have to either improve your personality to deal with bully like her or to learn fast of ignoring her comments.
As far as sitting in front seat is concerned you can also manage to come out early and occupy this seat. It is not that difficult.
You are matured enough to deal in such situations, no need for legal experts' advice on these petty issues.
ajay sethi
(Expert) 11 June 2014
well advised by Anriudh
Guest
(Expert) 11 June 2014
Don't bother to respond to her remarks. After some time, your silence would lock her mouth about your earings, etc. Likings or dislikings of each individual differ from person to person. So, why to bother? Be carefree.
Rajendra K Goyal
(Expert) 11 June 2014
Be diplomatic, avoid her, try to hire another van. Even you reach early don't try to take first seat of your choice.
There are so many big issues around you than her, she is not important, do not give her importance.
R.K Nanda
(Expert) 11 June 2014
no more to add.
K.K.Ganguly
(Expert) 11 June 2014
Not a legal query. Kids dispute needs to be settled by the Head Teacher, not lawyers.
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 11 June 2014
Expert Rajender K. Goyal has represented my views.
Biswanath Roy
(Expert) 12 June 2014
This is totally an unwanted query in this legal forum to give advise or opinion.
Guest
(Querist) 12 June 2014
To all the experts,
Thanks for your "advice"
As far as I know,teachers have a code of conduct outlined for them according to which they have to behave well with each other.
No government allows mental harassment.
Still you say that I have a child like behavior.
If my principal hears something about me,then even without cross checking me,she starts scolding me publically.I plead her to hear my side,but to no avail.
But if I complain about people like the above colleague, she says I should take a transfer.She never scolds or corrects them.That's why people have become so spoiled and full of misbehavior.
Will you still say I am childish and avoid giving me any sound advice??
Dont i have the right to work in dignity?
V R SHROFF
(Expert) 12 June 2014
All have right to work in dignity,
It is not called for legal battle;
Personality problem cannot be dragged to court..
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 12 June 2014
Everyone including you has right to work in dignified manner and the boss should also give his decision after hearing both sides but in practical life, one has to suffer many unwarranted things for the wait of good time.
T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate
(Expert) 14 June 2014
She has raised the similar query in the forum section too, may be she is trying to attract sympathy of the experts here to her absurd query over which experts cannot waste their time.
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 14 June 2014
It is not wise to post the similar query at both platforms of the same site.
Sudhir Kumar, Advocate
(Expert) 17 June 2014
have you given any written complaint about this colleague to high authorities?
Sudhir Kumar, Advocate
(Expert) 17 June 2014
repeated
http://www.lawyersclubindia.com/forum/details.asp?mod_id=103665&offset=2#.U6BbRUBvdG0
