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A case of love, cheating & money

(Querist) 02 April 2013 This query is : Resolved 
Dear experts,

Sorry to confuse you with the heading.My problem is that before one half years I was in a relationship with one girl who was in my same company but in a differnt branch.We had physical relation also to some extend. But after few months, we realised that our affair wont be accepted in the family and we stopped that kind of relation between us. In fact, I took the initiative and convinced the girl. After that we continued as best friends and I moved to a new company also. Before eight months, this girl lost her job and couldnt get another one yet. So during this time I had helped her financially. She owes me around 1 lakh. I had a guilty feeling in my mind that we shouldnt have done physical relation earlier. So, i was helping her as much as I can. Recently I got married and our friendship continued in a healthy manner. But last month she told me that she is in a relationship a guy who was working under me earlier. I enquired more detailed abt this guy and came to know that he is a flirt. More over, he is two yrs younger than her and doenst have a good job also and belongs to another religion which her parents will never allow. So, I told her to rethink on this and stop this. She turned against me and told me to not to bother about her and get the dues from her parents. Her boy friend called me and threatened he will give a fake complaint against me thru her that I am harrasing her. I talked with her brother and he came down and took her to native. He had told me that he would give the money back. But now, when caught, she turned the story around. She admitted her parents that she had taken money from me but now I forced her for some other relationship and as she did not agree I have made this fake story abt her affair. So please advice me whether I have a chance to get my money back? ( I have proofs of transactions), If they complaint to police that I forced her for physical relation, is it valid? I did everything for her good only but i cant believe she would invent such a fake story for safeguarding her side.
Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Expert) 02 April 2013
you certainly have chance of losing more money on bail etc when case is filed with police.
prabhakar singh (Expert) 02 April 2013
q."So please advice me whether I have a chance to get my money back?"

answer:"Before eight months, this girl lost her job and couldnt get another one yet. So during this time I had helped her financially. She owes me around 1 lakh. I had a guilty feeling in my mind that we shouldnt have done physical relation earlier. So, i was helping her as much as I can. "
" Recently I got married and our friendship continued in a healthy manner"


THEN FOLLOWING IS POKING NOSE UNNECESSARILY
IN HER LIFE "But last month she told me that she is in a relationship a guy who was working under me earlier. I enquired more detailed abt this guy and came to know that he is a flirt. More over, he is two yrs younger than her and doenst have a good job also and belongs to another religion which her parents will never allow. So, I told her to rethink on this and stop this. She turned against me and told me to not to bother about her and get the dues from her parents. "


ACTUALLY YOU HAVE NO PROBLEM BUT YOU ARE EAGER TO INVITE EVEN MORE THAN WHAT YOU HAVE STATED.

THE ADVICE IS THAT MOVE ON, YOU ARE MARRIED
NOW.YOUR PAST SHOULD NOT SHADOW ON PRESENT FOR A LAKH THAT WAS ADVANCED FOR CONSIDERATION OF AN ADMITTED GUILT OF HAVING SEX WITH HER.
Vidhi Joshi (Expert) 02 April 2013
its wise to leave the money as if any false complaint is filed against you, you might lose much more money than your disputed amount for settlement so better move on...as you have learned a lesson.
ajay sethi (Expert) 02 April 2013
as advised by experts forget the money . dont antagonise the girl . save your marriage
Devajyoti Barman (Expert) 02 April 2013
Yes , it is wise to forget the money and get the case settled amicably.
If you dig further, your marriage would be at stake.
Raj Kumar Makkad (Expert) 02 April 2013
Wo wada hi kya jo wfa ho gya........

Kasmain wade pyar wfa sab batain hain, bataon ka kya?

Bhul jao aur nye sire se jindagi jevo aur koi chara nhi hai.
Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Expert) 02 April 2013
Further analysis of your facts indicate that you probably think that since you have advanced huge sum to her and thereby developed a feeling of having purchased her. So though you have married you do not want her to go off your clutch unless she buys back her liberty and till such time she should have affair with no other man without you NOC.

Vijyant Nigam (09807349001) (Expert) 04 April 2013
.... FOR A LAKH THAT WAS ADVANCED FOR CONSIDERATION OF AN ADMITTED GUILT OF HAVING SEX WITH HER....

is it correct to let him deem a CONSIDERATION as adviced by a senior Mr. Prabhakar. i don't think so.

he may be innocent, so do we r advising him to simply live married life peacefully and forget about the past.. i agree with all the adivces above except THE "CONSIDERATION" PART.

When i think on the part of the girl to whom this guy himself convinced to live as friends after doing everything??? i have a different view.


prabhakar singh (Expert) 04 April 2013
Mr.Vijyant!

You need not agree with any of my comment.

It appears you read my post but NOT that of author's admission which reads"I had a guilty feeling in my mind that we shouldnt have done physical relation earlier. So, i was helping her as much as I can. "

Then my view is simply a sarcastic remark over his this kind of justification with duality of mind that what was HELP at one particular time due to his own guilt has now turned to be a DEBT as the time has passed.
Vijyant Nigam (09807349001) (Expert) 04 April 2013
Dear Mr. Prabhaker

wow, that's going as pleadings...

Petition followed by Counter and then Rejoinder.

is this called "duality of mind"???

need not be answered...
Raj Kumar Makkad (Expert) 04 April 2013
Viayant! Everyone is free to define a situation as per his own mind and understanding. None should mind it.
prabhakar singh (Expert) 04 April 2013
Vijyant !
i do not care of gone cases.Of bankruptcies that may take in several kinds.
Vijyant Nigam (09807349001) (Expert) 04 April 2013
i understand raj ji.


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