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Husband wants to live separately due to abusive nature of wife.

(Querist) 20 August 2015 This query is : Resolved 
Hi,
I am a 32 year old software engineer being mentally tortured by my abusive and violent wife of same age. Her parents also support her only. I am the only child of my parents and my wife forces me to break all relations with my parents. She is neither ready for separation nor ready to amend her abusive behaviour with me and my parents. We also have a 5 year old daughter.
My query :- The current accommodation where we live is a rented one in my name. Due to my wife’s abusive nature, I want to leave that house and start living separately with my parents. Now my question is how to escape from the liability of the property damages which my wife might do in the current rented accommodation if I leave her and start living separately? As soon as I leave her, she might start damaging or selling internal equipments like pipe fittings etc. or she might run the AC, geyser etc. continuously so that I am liable to pay the high electricity bill (as the rented house is in my name even if I had left it). Is there any way to escape from such liability after leaving that house which is rented in my name?
Guest (Expert) 20 August 2015
Basing On your query Both of you First Consult A Pscychologist Doctor Together For the Goodness of your Child.
Gaurav (Querist) 20 August 2015
Thanks a lot for your advice Narasimha but we have already tried that. Its not working anymore. Can you please answer my liability query? Is there any way to deal with it?
Sreedhar Valiveti (Expert) 20 August 2015
Mr.Gaurav, really astonished to observe your query, which is more pathetic. Do one thing. Serve a notice to your land lord first stating that you are going to vacate the premises very shortly and you ask him to hand over the premises. In the mean time, you pay the electric bill and rents in advance if need so.
But remember, if you are running far from your wife, there is a possibility that she may file a petition for restitution of her conjugal rights. So think twice before you act.
Otherwise you try for divorce and then stay separately, which is more suggestible. Because, running from problem is not a solution but finding solution amicably is perfect one.
Gaurav (Querist) 20 August 2015
Hi Sreedhar,
Thanks a lot for your useful advice. Actually she is not ready for divorce either. And living with her is also very risky, as she keeps threatening me and my parents to trap us in false cases and get us harassed by Police.
If I file for a divorce then can I stay separately during the course of divorce case? Can she file restitution of her conjugal rights if the divorce case is going on in court?
Rudrawar Narayanreddy (Expert) 20 August 2015
cruelty is a ground for divorce. After filing divorce case, wife cannot file dowry harrassment or any offence case. even filed no danger as there is severance of relationship. As regarding the, liability to pay electricity bill etc your rent deed is to be perused for opinion.
SAINATH DEVALLA (Expert) 21 August 2015
Will she keep quit if U shift to a new accommodation,she will follow suit.I don't think she will stay separately in the old house all alone.Is she a housewife or a working woman?Keeping in mind the future of UR daughter,its better to solve the differences amicably with the help of elders of both the families and mediators too.
Rajendra K Goyal (Expert) 21 August 2015
Try to solve the situation amicable, take help of near relatives.

Serve the notice to vacate the premises, try to stay in separate rented accommodation.

In case of no settlement, make up your mind to face all harassment, court cases and you may finally get divorce.
Sreedhar Valiveti (Expert) 21 August 2015
Mr.Gourav, hope my friends Mr.Gaurav, Sainath & Rudrawar has answered your query and my earlier answer too.

Or else, do one thing. Serve a notice to your landlord stating that you are intending to vacate the flat and approach a senior advocate and serve a notice of divorce and mental harassment to your wife through him and immediately file a case in family court as early as possible.

But my sincere advise to you is try to solve the issue amicably with the help of your kit and kin or through a senior advocate who can handled such type of issues.
Kumar Doab (Expert) 21 August 2015
Record everything and build irrefutable evidence for use (if required at appropriate time in appropriate forum). Bring in unshakable witnesses.



At the same time try to save the marriage for the sake of your child.
Gaurav (Querist) 21 August 2015
Thanks a lot everyone for your support and useful advices. I and my parents have already tried to amicably talk to her and her parents but her parents are very arrogant. They are not at all ready to listen to us and always consider their daughter to be right no matter how much she misbehaves with me and my parents. I have also tried to talk softly with her for the sake of our child but she is not ready to amend her abusive ways towards me and my parents. She is a housewife but I provide all facilities and amenities to her like cook, full time maid etc.
She fights a lot with me but not ready to live separately also. It is quite possible that even if I move out of the house she might come after me wherever I go. She and her parents also keep threatening me and my old & ailing parents for Police cases etc.
If I file a divorce case or take help of Police then she will definitely fabricate false cases against me and then the Police might harass us.
I am not able to find out any way to get out of this troubled relationship. My parents are old and suffering with age problems of heart, liver etc. Can anyone please guide me stepwise how to get SUCCESSFULLY separated from her?
Any answers please?
Gaurav (Querist) 22 August 2015
Please refer to my above query. Any answers please? I am really very tensed and need some concrete advice.
Kumar Doab (Expert) 22 August 2015
Record everything and consult an able local lawyer specializing in such/family/civil matters in person.


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