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Marriage

(Querist) 07 November 2011 This query is : Resolved 
hi,
i am lovely sharma.i am in love wid a girl her name preet kaur.both of us our parents are againest our marriage.someone suggest me aarya samajh mandir's marriage is also leagal in india and indian court.we do not want to tell about our marriage to anyone.neither we have any witness.can anyoneplease help us.is there any problem regarding arya samajh mandir'marriage,plz help us.
prabhakar singh (Expert) 07 November 2011
What a fate parents named you 'lovely'
her's named her 'preet'

And you both have kept your names according to wishes of parents but they are now opposed to your union which they should not be, in my opinion, if they are the law abiding citizen.


But you have not disclosed your or preet 's age then how can it be decided you both can marry on your own or not.????


However Marriages performed by Arya samaj are legal and they also issue marriage certificate.
lovely sharma (Querist) 07 November 2011
respected sir,
we both are 21 year's old.I am belong to brahmin family and she is sikh.sir can u plz tell us if her parents goes for any F.I.R. and file a case againest me and our marriage then what can i do.
prabhakar singh (Expert) 07 November 2011
When you both are 21 you both can legally marry but get warned her age and commitment for you is every thing,let it be police are any one no one can do any thing if she states she is major and loves you and lives with you on her own free will and have married you or wants to marry you.

Any short fall in age causing her minor below 18 or you going short of even one day of 21 cause your head in soup.

where are you located??

After marriage and its certification none can do any thing.Before marriage her statement and age is every thing for you.

She must be 18+ and she must always state in your favor very boldly let it be any authority police or court.Law favors wish of person who is major.Then it is mutuality of you two and nothing else can prevail.
Rajeev Kumar (Expert) 07 November 2011
Dear lovely, As per as given information both of you are of the marriageble age as per as law and the Arya Samaj marriage is valid and they issued certificate but be wary girl should not be refused from being marriaged otherwise you will be implicated in various sections of IPC like kidnapping.
lovely sharma (Querist) 07 November 2011
sir,
my date of birth is 2-feb-1990.and her date of birth age is 12-dec-1990.I am from ambala city and she is from ludhiana.it's will be be run case.but she with me.in this weekand we go for marriage.
ajay sethi (Expert) 07 November 2011
lovely your parents must have lot of expectations from you . as you are only 21 you are too younge to be married .

first stand on your own feet . start earning . how will you support your wife when you are not earning .?

if tomorrow you have children how will you support your wife and kids ? where will you stay .

dont take any hasty decision . your parents are your well wishers . maary only when you can support your family
Devajyoti Barman (Expert) 07 November 2011
Both of you can very marry each other and no one except either of you can proceed legally to break the marriage.

You can go for Arya Samaj marriage or temple marriage.
Shailesh Kr. Shah (Expert) 07 November 2011
As per facts stated,you can go for Araya Samaj marriage.


one more thing, I would also like to say that life is not to follow laws only. It is something more. you can consider views of Shri Ajay Sethi.
ajay sethi (Expert) 07 November 2011
lovely ji you are from punjab . as far as arya samj marriages are concerned the rajasthan high court has put brakes on such marraiges and directed 6 days notice be given to parents
ajay sethi (Expert) 07 November 2011
news.outlookindia.com/item.aspx?739267


Arya Samaj marriages may no longer be a quick and smooth affair for rebellious couples who do not get parental consent.

The Rajasthan High Court has put a ban on such type of love marriages under Arya Samaj traditions if the parents of both the bride and bridegroom are not informed through police about the intention of their children to enter into a wedlock.

A bench comprising justices Dalip Singh and Sajjan Singh Kothari also ruled that no love marriage through Arya Samaj will be allowed to be solemnised unless it has been approved and recommended by two distinguished person of both the sides.

It has been made compulsory that both the boy and girl produce three prominent persons as witness of the marriage from either side at Arya Samaj if their parents object to the marriage.

The court directed that in case Arya Samaj authorities decide to go ahead with the ceremony despite objections of the parents, they will have to separately record the reasons for entering into such a mariage.

Expressing displeasure over the manner in which such marriages are being conducted by the Arya Samaj in Rajasthan, the court said, "The pious purpose of the Arya Samaj mission has been lost sight at by local units in the state and they are becoming tool for pacification of 'greed and lust' for girl and boy and once it is over the marriage lands in courts resulting in irreversible breakdowns".

In its order, the court directed that at least six days time must be given to the parents of both side to take a conscious decision on such a love marriage.

"It takes them one hour to solemnise a marriage between a 18-year-old girl and a 38 or 40-year-old gentleman which leaves scars forever in the life of parents who bring up their children with great passion and aspirations. Such marriages in lust and greed by young blood cannot be said to be correct.

"We cannot allow society to suffer due to outcome of such a bad marriage. Such marriages are giving bad message to society and need to be checked immediately," observed Justice Kothari.

The bench passed this order on a Habeas Corpus petition filed by 34-year-old Buddha Ram Meena who entered into such a marriage with 18-year-old Maina Bhatt. When the parents of girl came to know about the marriage, they took her away forcing Buddha to file a Habeas Corpus petition.
lovely sharma (Querist) 07 November 2011
Ajay sir and Shailesh sir,
i know all the things.at presently m doing M.B.A. i am in 1st semester.after this step my carrer finished.Her parents forceing her for marriage and if we not run then they married her in next months.she says me if m not come then she goes for sucide.we can't live without each other.after marriage may be our parents would be agree...m not sure they agree....May be.........we are in big trouble....nobody help us neither a friend nor any close relatives.....m puzzled...........we also do not want to tell about this matter to my another friends........ what we can do..... one side my beloved calling me another side my parents....love side is more heavy then parents............sir, hope you understand me.
ajay sethi (Expert) 07 November 2011
in my person opinion you should not be emotional . finsh your studies first .

no one can force your girl friend to marry against her wishes . if she is being forced to marry some one she can approach women cell in your area . also ldoge police complaint .

i do not know whether in punjab ary samaj hasto give notice to parents as per rajasthan high court judgement .

wait for some time convince your girl friend of your honourable intentions that you will marry her after you get a job and try to convince your parents
lovely sharma (Querist) 07 November 2011
we want to do marriage in delhi.we do not have any witness beside us. for a marriage are they any witness as like a paying witness is leagal or not. they do not knows us.
lovely sharma (Querist) 07 November 2011
sir,
nothing comes in my mind.......only one thingh.........break all the society's traditions......otherwise m does something with me....it's a last option i have.
mahendrakumar (Expert) 08 November 2011
I think,you should follow the advice of Mr.Ajay Sethi,in your own interest.

unlike the answers of some of the experts here,most of the time,Mr.Ajay answers by proper application of his mind. This time he has done it more prudently. Keep it up Mr.Ajay.
Shailesh Kr. Shah (Expert) 08 November 2011
Mr. Lovely Sharma

Life is yours. No one have right upon your life. I suggest you for your 'BEST' and rest upon you.

Remember: life is not to follow laws only. It is something more.


lovely sharma (Querist) 08 November 2011
All the respected sir's,
i am very very thankfull to you all gentleman's...

Now,i have a another question in my mind. Today early morning wen i read news paper's headlines a couple safe in police protection.both of his/her parents against them. And was trying to away them. Gentleman's in this couple case a intersting thing is that till now they not married and having a long relationship.but girls does not want to go with her parents.they sacred from own parents. Now they are in " POLICE-SAFE-HOUSE " . In my case we also running. if my parents and my beloved parents try to do something badly with us.what those steps we can take . Plz also tell us about the " POLICE-PROTECTION" . It's performed in d.c office.....or.....another office......
ajay sethi (Expert) 08 November 2011
thanks for the compliment mr mahendra kumar . i do have high regards for my fellow experts .
ajay sethi (Expert) 08 November 2011
lovely ji . think about your studies . forget this love business . you have your whole life ahead of you .

why should your parents hurt you ?

you are too immature to be married now . dont ruin your future .

you can ask your fiancee to go and lodge complaint with local police station t hat her parents are threatening to get her married against her wishes
lovely sharma (Querist) 08 November 2011
ajay g . we both are belong to a rural area......sir you already know that........in rural area people's thinking very backward.....all talk about society...,society...society...what people said......she pressurize by them if she complaint them then they kill her...then m also died....i know that this time we think about only love love love....all the things changing very quickly.......we both can't live without each other....if our parents not accept us then....we surely go for any crime in god's eye..........we are very closely and emotionally attached.....without love with love.........

Arvind Sehdev (Expert) 16 November 2011
Mr. Lovely,

What Mr. Ajay is telling you is absolutely correct and practical....

If you again want to marry it is your wish and burden.

But please keep this in mind

Love is blind but marriage opens your eyes... I would even say that it makes you wear spectacles....

Don't be hasty in this love business.. Make your career.. otherwise you will come to this forum asking for ways to get of this marriage..

but as you abovesaid statement says that you can't live without her... I would suggest: find a decent job with good paying capacity and then do whatever you want to..
After that you may even go to High Court and file for protection

but

until then it is strongly recommended on humanitarian grounds that please don't marry at such a tender age... you are playing with your and her future..

Rest is your call we can only suggest not force..



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