Sister's interference in my family after marriage
Vivek
(Querist) 17 April 2012
This query is : Resolved
Hello, I need some suggestion which I am facing in my family. I have a love marriage and my father was opposed to that and even my sisters. We have registered our marriage in a court too. Now the issue is I am single son of my family and I have 3 sisters. 2 Got married and one is unmarried. We tried to convince my father about our marriage but he still not agree with us as my father listen from the start of my elder sister. The intension of my elder sister is to get the house on her name of divide the property between 3 sisters. My father listen to her always. I stayed away for my home aroung 15 years for studies and all. My elder sister telling to my father that ur son got married he will not take care of you but I wanted to take care of my parents but my father is too much influence with my elder sister. all members my sisters and father harrasing my mother and the reason behind that I will take home my mother and my sister can stay at my home and also she can use my fathers pension too. She is saying after marriage also I belongs to this family. To make this house i did work and i have rights on this property. As one day my father said to me please come here and devide the property as my sister told him like that and my father listen to her. I told to my father you are still alive and why you are talking like that. I am so much caring about my parents but because of my elder sister only my father not listen to me. My mother realise my sister's intesion about the property and thats why they harrase her. Please let me know what should I can do as a son. As I cant believe that sisters also can do like this. Oppose to my marriage is only for property nothing else otherwise for a single son no one father behave like this. Please suggest some solution on this.
Devajyoti Barman
(Expert) 17 April 2012
You rather get the property divided and move on life.
Shonee Kapoor
(Expert) 17 April 2012
If the property belongs to your father, he is free to deal with it the way he deems fit. Separate, earn and acquire your own properties.
Regards,
Shonee Kapoor
harassed.by.498a@gmail.com
Vivek
(Querist) 17 April 2012
Sir, I know these two options. What about my mother? these ppl harrasing as they thinking if we harrase her, her son will come and take his home and my sister can live with father and can ask to make house on her name. my mother is saying till my father is alive i will not come to you as she thinking if i come my sister stay there. any rules/act for such situation. please suggest
malipeddi jaggarao
(Expert) 17 April 2012
If you really love parents, you should not bother about all these things that happening. You should understand your marriage was not accepted by your parents initially. Being the only son, you should have convinced them instead of going for a registered marriage. It takes some time for healing the wounds. You and your wife should try your best to take your parents in to your fold. Already the mother is with you. Only by love and affection you can win your parents' heart. Do not attribute any motives to any of your family members. If the property is self-acquired property of your father, he is free to do whatever he wishes. If it is ancestral you can claim your right. One house is not too big a matter in the life than the affection of your parents. You continue taking care of your parents. Things will settle down. You will have satisfaction that being the only son you have performed your duty to your parents. Do not hate your sister. If you firmly believe that she has intentions to snatch away the property, better avoid her. Your mother can play a big role. You tell that you are not interested in property. You tell her that that you wanted to marry that girl and you married and apologize for the way it was performed without taking their consent. Take your wife along with you in giving love and affection. The days are not far that your parents also forget the past and be with you.
Vivek
(Querist) 17 April 2012
Jaggarao thank you for your reply. Actually I am staying very far from my home because of my job. I already got married in 2010 and i have a kid. My sister she stay at the same place where my parents are but she stay in rented house there. I tried to convinced my father around 2/3 years. even for engagement and marriage i personally went at home and i invited them for the marriage. they were not present in my marriage.
As per me my father can change but my elder sister is giving some wrong suggestion and my father listen to her. even my borther in law is saying we have rights on my fathers property. I am not interested in property but wat i want is my parents shud understand the things wat my sister is doing. my mother she understood evertything abt this thats the reason my sister hate her.
when my child came, my mother came to see my child fighting with my father. my father bit her but also she came to see my baby. afterthat when she went back nobody talk with her. even not my father and my sisters. they are harrasing her. My sister saying if u care then take back to ur mom at ur home. We will take care of our father. even my sister saying we will not give a chance for my fathers funeral and all...
I am no more interested in property but what i want is my parents shud understand the things what my sister, brother in law doing. once my mother said somthing to my sister, my elder sister said to her i will slap u. this is the case. My elder sister is talking to my father like we will give some money to both sister and we will take care of u. dnt be dependent on ur son.
My father thinking only my daughters can do everything but that is not the case as she want somthing else. otherwise why a real sister interfere in my family. as its matter of my family me my mom and my father can sit together and do everything who is she taking the decision of all the things. i dont have any rude feeling abt my parents but the way my sisters doing thats i feel wrong as they thinking i m far and i cant do anything on this issue. Please suggest on this. I hope u can understand the situation now.
Shonee Kapoor
(Expert) 17 April 2012
Simple, take the mother with you and keep her happy.
Regards,
Shonee Kapoor
harassed.by.498a@gmail.com
Vivek
(Querist) 18 April 2012
Thanks for your suggestion Shonee. I asked my mother to come at me and I will take care of you but my mother is saying like till her husband is alive i cant leave the house otherwise i don't have guarantee that my daughter will take care of my husband. She is saying if I come to you then Elder sister will stay at home and she can say that nobody is taking care my father hence I am taking care of him and then she will say that I took care of my father, this home is mine now.
My mother say's till i am alive i will not give this house to my daughter. she afraid to leave the house because of this reason.
Shonee Kapoor
(Expert) 18 April 2012
Hmmmm.
So arrange for a nurse for your parents.
What is more important, the parents who have given you all comforts, what if in the end they are not giving you property. You still should take care of them.
Maybe your father would change the will later. But any service you do to your parents should not be with expectation of rewards, it is your duty.
Karmanyevadhikar aste,
maa faleshu kadachan
Regards,
Shonee Kapoor
harassed.by.498a@gmail.com
Vivek
(Querist) 18 April 2012
Nice suggestion. Shonee. I am agree. Actually i was in confused state. What about the sister who is interefering more and because of that the issue is occuring. is there anything that I can do?
