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wife not willing for divorce. please help


My wife and I have been separated since 3 years. In between there has been mediation / reconciliation talks but failed. I am not willing to stay with her but she doesnt want to divorce me. I agree that i'm not willing to give her another chance, cause if I do then i will be risking my life..

1) I am completely averse with her and do not want to continue this relationship. I also proposed to settle it in MCD and i was willing to compensate her. but she is not willing.

2) She has not made any actual attempts to work out the marriage. She has been staying away without any contact (phone/email) since 8 months and she says she doesnt want to divorce me. I dont see a point in this.

3) Her parents are waiting for me to make a move and file a case so that they can grab a hefty compensation.

I dont know what to do especially in a situation where law is completely against the man. She is earning well and is in a managerial position earning 30K a month and is staying in a PG.

finally, what will be the conclusion to my life? will I have to live like this? hence I havent filed a case because I know the court will ask to work out the marriage and I'm not willing to at any cost.. Please suggest, what are my options???

Senior Partner

1. Every person coming on this tiny planet comes with a weak point. Recall – explore hers. That is where your liberation lis stands. Yes, one of the procedures of Court is to unite parties but not even Hon'ble SC can unite two un-willing spouses so where she and you going to stand after a decade old me first or you second mover advantage idealism stand - naturally towards a divorce!

2. Majority of empowered wife are influenced by their parents and THAT exclusive circle of born advisors they keep henpecked from their cradle to graying hair and similarly it is experienced that they do listen to their parents / their sides of advisors advises only. Now if you say to us she is not interested in compensation but simultaneously your intuition says in-laws are waiting just for that. Then convey about the carrot to in-laws via some neutral mediator even if it means eventually for that you have to sell at the end part of your liver (naturally it grows back so nothing to worry on that last resort attempt to save once bottom), who knows via such in-direct feedback to in-laws they make their apple of a daughter listen - listen and give both of you your respective freedoms, after all today what counts are;
MONEYRAMA and not RELATIONS PERIOD. The highest smart bidder takes the pudding is what is said about Indian divorces. Marriages in India is simply turning into contract and gone are the days of it only referred to as sacred so why your thinking is that of a monk!

3. For three years if you say you tried your best and had heard same continuous stand from better-half then what is the harm in filing "mental cruelty and desertion based Divorce" case against her? What she can maximum do in retaliation; few Complaint case against you / your side; let her file them, protection as in remedies are there against such complaint cases too and it is not that such remedies for husband / his side are non-existing in Indian Law. For maintenance I have noticed every husband coming here with a query always says wife is earning such and such and I hardly seen any husband disclosing his income in his very first query thread post – same somehow has to be elicited which I always find amusing! So if you say to us she is earning 30 K so I believe you are not driving a rikshaw so speak about your side of income - earning too so that someone can guess how much maintenance you may shell out if some maintenance case gets to the floor of the Court during divorce case matter and thus complete justice to a query here as in a sensible reply cometh to chalk out next stage of liberation from once bad marriage.

Now what will happen if para 3 shown green light?

4. Eventually both will have to be separated by divorce instead of currently sitting ideating about divorce on some plain gospel speech of your wife.

So unless you show your cries "legally" how you expecting Court to daily feed you your staple milk!

Think prudently now wearing a "just" thinking cap instead of waiting her to not give you your legitimate divorce on a silver plate …….. 


Advocate/Legal Consultant (rpchughadvocatesupremecourt@hotmail.com)

Dear Querist,

A couple of things :-

1. No Court can impose mediation or concilliation on you if you do not want the same. 

2. If your wife is working then she is not entitled to any maintenance. These judgments may help you avert a maintenance decree. :-

How to fight a Maintenance case (Section 24 HMA) filed by your wife.

This is an article on how to successfully defend a maintenance case filed by your wife. 

These are the judgments, that we have successfully used over the years, alongwith the relevant excerpts, to negative a woman’s claim for maintenance in courts across India. It is always important to do a little homework.

1. Keep a track on your wife’s finances.

2. Her PAN Card No. may be vital to get her income tax returns. 

 When the maintenance proceedings are on – then in that case you can always emphasise strongly on the fact that these provisions were meant to protect genuinely harassed and incapable women from starvation and destitution, and not a vehicle of oppression allowing women to live as parasites. ‘Incapacity to earn is the most vital consideration’ Hence if a wife is otherwise able bodied and educated and fails to work solely because of sheer lethargy and desire to break down husband financially in that situation she is not entitled to any maintenance. 


1. Madhya Pradesh High Court – Smt. Mamta Jaiswal vs Rajesh Jaiswal on 24 March, 2000 – Equivalent citations: 2000 (4) MPHT 457

“6. In view of this, the question arises as to in what way Section 24 of the Act has to be interpreted. Whether a spouse who has capacity of earning but chooses to remain idle, should be permitted to saddle other spouse with his or her expenditure ? Whether such spouse should be permitted to get pendente life alimony at higher rate from other spouse in such condition ? According to me, Section 24 has been enacted for the purpose of providing a monetary assistance to such spouse who is incapable of supporting himself or herself in spite of sincere efforts made by him or herself. A spouse who is well qualified to get the service immediately with less efforts is not expected to remain idle to squeeze out, to milk out the other spouse by relieving him of his or her own purse by a cut in the nature of pendente life alimony. The law does not expect the increasing number of such idle persons who by remaining in the arena of legal battles, try to squeeze out the adversory by implementing the provisions of law suitable to their purpose. In the present case Mamta Jaiswal is a well qualified woman possessing qualification like M. Sc. M.C. M.Ed. Till 1994 she was serving in Gulamnabi Azad Education College. It impliedly means that she was possessing sufficient experience. How such a lady can remain without service ? It really puts a big question which is to be answered by Mamta Jaiswal with sufficient congent and believable evidence by proving that in spite of sufficient efforts made by her, she was not able to get service and, therefore, she is unable to support herself. A lady who is fighting matrimonial petition filed for divorce, can not be permitted to sit idle and to put her burden on the husband for demanding pendente lite alimony from him during pendency of such matrimonial petition. Section 24 is not meant for creating an army of such idle persons who would be sitting idle waiting for a ‘dole’ to be awarded by her husband who has got a grievance against her and who has gone to the Court for seeking a relief against her. The case may be vice-versa also. If a husband well qualified, sufficient enough to earn, sits idle and puts his burden on the wife and waits for a ‘dole’ to be awarded by remaining entangled in litigation. That is also not permissible. The law does not help indolents as well idles so also does not want an army of self made lazy idles. Everyone has to earn for the purpose of maintenance of himself or herself, atleast, has to make sincere efforts in that direction. If this criteria is not applied, if this attitude is not adopted, there would be a tendency growing amongst such litigants to prolong such litigation and to milk out the adversory who happens to be a spouse, once dear but far away after an emerging of litigation. If such army is permitted to remain in existence, there would be no sincere efforts of amicable settlements because the lazy spouse would be very happy to fight and frustrate the efforts of amicable settlement because he would be reaping the money in the nature of pendente lite alimony, and would prefer to be happy in remaining idle and not bothering himself or herself for any activity to support and maintain himself or herself. That can not he treated to he aim, goal of Section 24. It is indirectly against healthyness of the society. It has enacted for needy persons who in spite of sincere efforts and sufficient efforts arc unable to support and maintain themselves and arc required to fight out the litigation jeopardising their hard earned income by toiling working hours”


2. ) Kumaresan Vs. Aswathi  reported in (2002) 2 MLJ 760

wherein it has been held as under :- “8…….A plain reading of the above provision would show that the only condition required for grant of maintenance pendente lite is the party should not have sufficient independent income for her/his support. If it is found that the applicant has sufficient income for his/her support, no amount can be allowed as maintenance pendente lite as per section 24 of the Act. But of course, if it is found that the applicant has no sufficient independent income for his/her support, such application can be considered and suitable maintenance amount can be awarded pendente lite.”


3. Manokaran @ Ramamoorthy Vs. M. Devaki reported in AIR 2003 Mad 212, wherein it has been held as under :-

“5…..The above averment shows that the petitioner herein/husband is working in Senthil Auto Garage, Annai Sathya Nagar, Chennai-102 and drawing a salary of Rs.2000/- per month. Likewise, it is also seen that the respondent herein/wife is working in Raj T.V and drawing

a salary of Rs.4,500/-. Though the said aspect has not been substantiated, I have already referred to the admission of the respondent herein in her counter statement filed in the main O.P.1310/2000 wherein she admitted that she secured a private job and is getting salary and staying with her brother. On the other hand, it is established particularly from Ex. R-1, the petitioner herein is getting only Rs.70/- per day or Rs.2000/- per month by working in Senthil Auto Garage. I have already referred to the language used in Section 24 which makes it clear that for grant of maintenance pendente lite the party should not have sufficient independent income for her support. In the light of the materials available, particularly the admitted case of the respondent/wife, she is employed in a private Satelite T.V. and earning for her livelihood staying with her brother, it cannot be construed that she is not having sufficient independent income. The Family Court lost its sight to consider the above material aspect.”

3. She can file a 498a/406 against you and your family. Though you can take certain pre-emptive steps to mitigate if not completely rule out damage. Read  http://bharatchugh.wordpress.com/2012/07/07/how-to-fight-a-false-498a-case-in-india-a-step-by-step-legal-strategy/


Good Luck !

Bharat Chugh

Advocate Supreme Court of India

reach me at : bharat.law06@gmail.com

Total likes : 1 times


if you dont want to stay with her, file a case immediately

very useful Bharat sir, thank you




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