Criminal Trident Pack: IPC, CrPC and IEA by Sr. Adv. G.S Shukla and Adv. Raghav Arora
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Lollipop (SW)     19 October 2013

Victim seeking revenge

Hi

I'm 31 yr old lady married to a lovable idiot. But problem is he's a Mommy's boy and not listening to my parents. He takes good care of me but sometimes gets angry and beats me when I quarrel with him. I suspect he has many affairs with other girls as he's always on the phone talking to someone or other.

 

My parents advised me to bring him to stay with them but he's not accepting because he has own house where we've been living alone since marriage. I don't like his mother who comes to visit sometimes. I suspect he's talking to his mom all 24hrs of the day. I want him only for me.

 

So recently as per my parents & lawyer advice, I filed a 498a case on him & his mother so I can bring him back to me. But police are not arresting them. What can I make sure to arrest them? Can I file a DV case to make sure they get arrested? Because my parents feel only by arresting him atleast for few days I can bring some sense into him.

 

Also he's not letting me take care of my parents financially. My two sisters are in US so its my responsibility to give my salary to my parents which he's not allowing. My parents run a small business and have brought us up with much difficulty so now its my turn to support them. Also he's bought the house in his name. How can I get it transferred into my name? Any case can be filed for this?

 

Please advice me on how to make him come down to my terms of married life.




Learning

 90 Replies


(Guest)

I think filing 498a & DV will not not bring him back to you. infact will break your marriage permanantly . Rest of the things you can ask to your expert lawyer who advised you to file 498a. I think you have selected right name for your self coz  you will definately get Lollipop after filing false cases.

1 Like

(Guest)

Also u can get his flat transferred on your name by paying him money more than the flats market value & by paying stamp duty, registration & society transfer fees.

 

NO OTHER WAY

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Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Advocate)     19 October 2013

I am ardent supporter of ladies fighting domestic violence and dowry abuse. But your case is classic. You are (as per your descripttion) fully blameworthy. These laws are meant for protection of victim ladies and ladies like you are making mockery of these laws and forcing people to lobby against it. remember 498a is the only criminal statute in the world where the accused have formed associations and NGOs to fight against collectively. remember that in any cognizable offense a police officer of at least of the rank of CONSTABLE can make arrest without warrant but this is the only law where there are judicial citations in each state prescribed guidelines for the procedure to be followed before arrest and arrest with permission of a sufficiently senior officer. Although I am supporter of 498a, I believe such laws are need badly to sustain society, but seeing cases like you I feel constrained and not able to disagree with those who oppose such laws.
1 Like

Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Advocate)     19 October 2013

some advised you "Also u can get his flat transferred on your name by paying him money more than the flats market value & by paying stamp duty, registration & society transfer fees." not possible to compel him to do so. Furthermore you may not behaving so much money. There is no such provision.

(Guest)

Agree with Sudhir ji...

Samir N (General Queries) (Business)     19 October 2013

In further support of @Sudhir Kumar's observations, could you please pass the following message to your husband?


Why are you beating her only when you argue with her. Beat her real badly, every single hour, whether you have a reason or not. You have good reasons to do so.

Also beat her parents  for their conspiratorial conduct in aiding and abetting the breakdown of your marriage. As for having affairs, have more. Otherwise you are not going to get mental relief from this abusive wife. If possible, go away for a few days vacation with your girl-friend. As for all the false cases that she files, they are good for you. The falsity of these cases will help you file a divorce based upon mental cruelty. So, please go and visit a psychiatrist and make up all kinds of cock-and-bull stories that you cannot sleep and that in you get nightmares of witches who look like your wife and get medication. Preserve the prescripttion but put the medication in your wife's meals quietly. After divorce, you will not have to pay her maintenance because cruel wife is not entitled to it under the law. Then have fun with your girl-friends and live happily ever after!


1 Like

Lollipop (SW)     19 October 2013

Reading some of the above comments - all that fury - it's mostly got to do with respect - which people lack just because of their egoistic male ego. Its not very far off when women were treated harshly and with indifference just because they were the weaker s*x. Now with the way women have come up in their life it is their right to be treated fairly and with generous kindness which many men lack.


In all such abuse cases there is often a controlling/domineering spouse(husband). They rule, no matter what!. I have experienced this and have seen it in many families It is well known that many seemingly successful/confident women are abused wives in the home. There are many forms of abuse/control which show no outward signs.

Don't forget that, as is so often the case, it is the wife who supported the husband in all his activities, sacrificing her opportunities, then why cant he atleast take care of the wife's family financially? Why should he restrict me giving my own salary to my parents? Its abusing my rights to take care of my parents right?

 

You might have all heard this "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned"


So why cant a woman file a case of 498a which can give the woman some kind of control over such ruthless men? - Men with no moral character who talk & have affair with lot of women and men who beat their wives at home?? Also FYI filing this 498a case was not my idea since I do not know the laws per se. I was told by my lawyer, who said it is the only way to bring my husband into control. Because he is no ordinary man- he is a Manager in a big corporation and earns handsomely well and lacks nothing in life.  So to bring him under control it requires some harsh steps.


@Sudhir sir, I appreciate you that you are a supporter of woman's rights and I salute you for that but why do you feel I'm to be blamed here? My parents really feel that he can be brought into our control only if he's arrested. Can you please advise me in this regard as I'm the victim here? My parents applied political pressure and with great difficulty we got this FIR filed on my husband that too directly under the Asst Commissioner of Police but still now they haven't arrested him or his mother.

 

I'm really hoping for some genuine help from the greats in this forum instead of taking sides with my husband and ignoring me who is the real victim! 

 

Samir N (General Queries) (Business)     19 October 2013

Do not flatter yourself. Your conduct does not deserve fury. Fury is an expensive emotion. We would not waste it on you. Mockery is more like it! By your own admission, you file FALSE cases with the intent to get your  husband arrested and you consider yourself a victim. Hell No! Did I say that your husband ought to beat you more? Well I stand corrected: Your types should be belted and stoned not just beaten! May be we should nationally enact part of  the Shariah or whatever that Islamic law is called which punishes women making false accusations by stoning them.


"Also FYI filing this 498a case was not my idea since I do not know the laws per se. I was told by my lawyer, who said it is the only way to bring my husband into control."  I think there was a typo in your first post. You say you are 31. Perhaps you are 13 and do not understand the consequences of filing a 498a case? I guess this is one of those child-marriage cases. How many "lollipops" will it take to withdraw that 498a case?  


As for "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" You are lucky you have a "lovable idiot" as your husband. I would have showed you how easy it is to douse such fury. You want his mother arrested too by filing a FALSE complaint. Is his mother less woman than you? I find it sickening that you want an elderly lady arrested by knowingly filing a FALSE complaint. You quoted Shakespeare but as my knowledge of Angrezi is very poor, I would prefer to quote our very own Kalidas who once said: "There is no fury worse than a man's whose mother was jailed." In Sanskrit it goes something like Yamo Namo Maata.... I am just kidding about the Kalidas and Sanskrit part but I hope you get the point. If his mother is put in jail, he will make life hell for you for the rest of your life. And no Shakespearean fury is going to help you douse it.


By the way, there are no "greats" in this forum! We are as "great" as it gets in here!! :)And most of the men here will not be impressed by your filing of a FALSE complaint with the Asst. Commissioner of Police. Do you know that in itself is a violation of the Indian Penal Code?  Did your advocate not explain that to you? Does he not know that that is also a violation of the Bar Council Rules and he could be disbarred if someone pursues that route? Or are you paying him more than his fees to have him disregard his ethical obligations? Oops! I forgot, you are the victim here!!


ADVICE FROM A "GREAT": Your marriage is all but over. Just the Court formalities of divorce remain. The earlier the two of you get it, the better it will be for both of you. Did your advocate not tell you that the filing of a false 498a case is construed to be a valid cause of inflicting mental cruelty which in itself is sufficient justification for seeking divorce? Or may be your advocate is the lollipop eating type, literally of figuratively, you figure it out Ms. Lollipop.


2 Like

Atheist (none)     19 October 2013

heheheh you will get big lollipop at the age of 40 from your husband. Go baby Go file 498A.

2 Like

498_final stage (Professional)     19 October 2013

Hey lollypopo You think filing false cases can get you into a relationship???? It would make your life hell first. Also if court fuound that u have conspired against your husband hen get ready to taste iron bars in jail. I liked your confidence though We need more woman like you to abolish this law Are by chance from kanpur???

498_final stage (Professional)     19 October 2013

Madam ka interview karwao ndtv per she is quite an item lol

Lollipop (SW)     19 October 2013

I fail to understand why most of you are having a tough time empathising with me(the victim) but rather saying I'm filing such FALSE cases!!

Why do you presume that I've filed a FALSE case?
Below are my husband's misdemeanours:

  • Always asking about my savings before marriage whenever I ask him to save money(his salary & mine)
  • Every month promptly transferring ALL my salary into his account so that I can't give any money to my parents
  • Beating me whenever we have a quarrel (mostly about money)
  • Always criticizing that my parents have not given anything during marriage so they should not question his usage of money
  • Chatting / Talking with many girls always - I have CDR proofs!


So all of these things above does it not translate into cruelty of the victim(me) and hence a 498a offense?
As per my understanding through net, 498a is
INDIAN PENAL CODE (IPC), SECTION 498A : Husband or relative of husband of a woman subjecting her to cruelty : Whoever, being the husband or the relative of the husband of a woman, subjects such woman to cruelty shall be punished with imprisonment for a term which may extend to three years and shall also be liable to fine. 498a is a criminal offense. It is cognizable, non-bailable, and non-compoundable offense.

And FYKI, my lawyer is also a esteemed member of this great forum who is "FIGHTING FOR THE REAL JUSTICE  TO ALL" and he gives advice on various criminal & civil cases right here on this forum. He has been thanked 18 times and has profile visits of 2621! So I think you can understand he knows a thing or two about the Indian law?

Atheist (none)     19 October 2013

why you girl don't find any new story ? i really bored to listen every time same story.

1 Like

Samir N (General Queries) (Business)     19 October 2013

First thank you for the entertainment. I am a workaholic and this is a good break while I am working!


To be fair to you, all jokes aside, I do sympathize with the beating part. I abhor that part and to some extent about his talking to other girls while he is still married. But SWEET LOLLIPOP, look at what you are doing? Read your own posts. It is all focused on getting flat on your name and money issues. What do you expect from him and what reaction would you expect from other men in this forum? Which moron ("esteemed lawyer") gave you the idea that filing a 498a case is going to bring him closer to you? And filing a DV case does not result in your husband's arrest either.


About your lawyer, you say he is an "esteemed" member of this "great" forum. The term "esteemed lawyer" is an oxymoron and this is anything but a great forum. Its good to get some guidance and the best guidance does not come from any "esteemed" lawyers here but ordinary non-lawyers. You say that your esteem lawyer got 18 thanks in 2621 profile visits. I got 26 or so thanks, not to mention numerous PMs thanking me in about one fourth the profile visits and I am neither an advocate nor an "esteemed" member in any sense of that word! Matter of fact, who cares about these thanks. You help others and enjoy helping. Thats what counts. There are no awards, promotions, etc. We are all anonymous here... helping in a virtual world!


I strongly recommend that you stop reading Shakespeare and do some old-fashioned reading of the Gita or Bible or Kuran or whatever religion you follow. Take a break for a few weeks and then come back and approach the problem afresh. Be nice to your husband and take a different approach. Then you will feel like booting your "esteemed lawyer" and changing your id to something other than Lollipop. No, not Bubblegum please! You will also feel like giving all of us a BIG thank you! 


 

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