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Problem! help..

hi...I work in a MNC..I am in love with a co-worker since 3 years and was about to marry her in court as we belong to different caste.But one sunday a person came to meet me and said that he is the husband of my girlfriend and working as a doctor in a Central Govt dept.He showed photograph, video recordings of their marriage which proves his wife is my girlfriend.

I asked this to my girlfriend and she said she did this marriage under parent's infuence and she has no feeling for her husband.She want to divorce and settle with me.I am very much confused and sad also as she will suicide if I refuse and I love her very much.Pleas shoew me the way to solve .How can I get her?

Her husband told me he will file case on me if i don't leave his wife.


 10 Replies

Anish Thakur 7018812737 (advocate)     23 July 2012

dear querist ,

be aware ,her husband can file case against you of adultery if she gt sufficient evidence to proove it .

however my advise is not to go so deep in this case as you are now aware of the things that she is wife of anyone why you are still interested in her,leave her and find some another girl who is made for you exclusively by god.

safe yourself and save that guy and those families.

Anish Thakur 7018812737 (advocate)     23 July 2012

then call me tomorow for detailed advise

dhirendra pateria (law officer)     24 July 2012

dont marry her she is a cheater

SAHIL (LEGAL)     24 July 2012

Ranee told absolutely correct, there are so many girls in life and in this world, why you go after here? try some other girl, she is cheating you, might be she might have some cruel intentions in her mind which you may not be aware, leave here immediately and try to find other girl, it will be happy for you and for your family, please for god sake try to understand us

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     24 July 2012

1. Ask her to file case on her husband and wait for legal outcome. That will keep her suicide plans (moral torpedo) shifted to a very long future date. This is how one stalemates emotions with emotions and confuses yours oppnent for very long time J
2. They already have spoken about her extra marital affairs otherwise he would not have come prepared to meet you and he loves her but she does not love her nor you have stated in your brief that she loves you except that you stated here that you love her.
3. The moment case goes on floor of the Court husband will initially resist the same and finally will give in bze no right minded husband (read as public servants are scarred of legal controversies; you say he is Govt. hospital Dr. - right; Otherwise by now he would have already filed case on you as 3 years of extra marital relationship no husband will tolerate) wants now-a-days litigations from a un-cohabitate natured civilian wife.
4. The moment she is legally free from her marital bonds start afresh with her as live-in.  
5. If everything works out good given some time of living as live-in partners give name to your this live-in relationship; that of marriage.
6. History may or may not repeat with you for that no one can give you a certificate today it is your story you should write an epilogue onto it with wide open eyes only thing an Advocate can show is way out as per his
True love transcends legal boundaries legally and society accept open or closed door relationship equally and no hard feelings (read as morality lectures here) comeths. Either people do it openly or behind closed door but when legal option there then use it to your advantage for the time being; thy name LOVE.  

1 Like



Please make the points clear as failed to get you.

  1. 1.What cases you are saying about to file on husband?
  2. 2.She loves me .
  3. 3.I she files any case on husband, can husband file bigamy on me?Will it cause loss to my career?
  4. 4.My parents are very conservative and father was a principal of repute.Liv-in will be problematic.Can not I marry her?
  5. 5.Yes I have faith on her, so history will not repeat.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     24 July 2012

1. What cases you are saying about to file on husband?

Take: Divorce. BTW, a woman in brief spoken situation doen not file divorce to get it for sure but eventualy gets it !

2. She loves me.
Take: You have to note that (means assure yourself of) not me.


3. If she files any case on husband, can husband file bigamy on me? Will it cause loss to my career?
Take: Not any case she may file that “paid” advise is left open for Chamber discussions ! Onto your career question - Depends what “opportunity* and “inclination* evidence till date you left behind to charge you / her on bigamy / adultry respectively charges by her husband. Every case has
Newton’s Third Law of Motion in play hence wide open eyes are always necessary before plunging into one.


4. My parents are very conservative and father was a principal of repute. Liv-in will be problematic. Can not I marry her?
Take: ha ha… if parents were of repute social standings then ask yourself why got yourself involved into a married woman’s bedroom? Somewhere some once sanskar went wrong is it not! However these sly observations besides the point here; once she is legally divorced she is free to marry any one after appeal period.


5. Yes I have faith on her, so history will not repeat.
Take: Vouching for other partner is always seen with doubt in matrimonial relationship between two spouses. However this is for you to know (being assure of) not me bze you are her partner of passion planning on marriage with her not public here is saying so.

Notes on proof of adultry/bigamy:-

*Opportunity” means that the spouse has been in the company of another at a place, and for a time, where s*xual intercourse could have occurred.

*Inclination” requires proof that the persons involved were "inclined" to participate in s*xual relations.

Nina Rakheja (unhappily married)     25 July 2012

This is how morality goes away and crime emerges..oh no..I did not expect this from Tajob whom I believe to be the aged member of the could he encourage filing divorce instead of advicing the author to forget about the lady and start afresh with another lady?Why this same person doesn't advice me in my divorce and get true  dashing boyfriend, ma love? This is not fair! Instead he talked dirty to me..yuk..I am not to that level to talk those to an elderly people.Why are you so supisciousTajob?The author told he did not knew about the marriage, yet you are insulting him by saying that he went to a married woman's bed room??..This is also not fair.!People who thinks more of divorce of other's wife and other's bed room are not healthy in the sense ...!somebody adviced you to gor for meditation or yoga, why don't you go for that dear??..these are  scientific and works positive on human body and mind.Don't you think so?If you stop taking moongfali then also it will helpful to you!

you may have probably heard, A BOONDI CAN NEVER BE TURNED INTO A RASGOLLA..

1 Like

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     25 July 2012

Originally posted by : Nina Rakheja
  This is how morality goes away and crime emerges..oh no..XXX


Morality is a word not suitable coming out from your 2 inch mouth so keep your mouth shut ref. with me (read as till the time I am) here and do usual time pass as this forum is yours dowry to reader(s) I have realised that. 

If you want to know where my ethics, morality and allegiance rests with, then, be it so; my dharma is to advocate client's interest as vigorously as possible within the bounds of the law (i.e. barest obligation to legality). I believe in let the chips roll where they may. It extends beyond adversary role to ensuring client autonomy in our complex legal system as required by the rule of law. A husband after committing bigamy comes to my chamber and confesses same to me I will still perform my dharma within the traditional conception being an adversarial advocate for a client.  Each post reply of mine till date will always reflect adversarial advocacy and it is way of dharma that I have been taught to practice and have belief in. PAUSE


My favourite illustration:


Lord Brougham's 1820 defence of Queen Caroline before the House of Lords is my favourite example of the ideal in action. King George IV was trying to rid himself of Queen Caroline by alleging she had committed adultery but it was well known that the King himself had been unfaithful. Lord Brougham implied that although he did not yet need to defend the Queen by attacking her husband, if such a defence did become necessary neither he nor


"even the youngest member in the profession, would hesitate to resort to such a course and fearlessly perform his duty ... [A]n advocate, in the discharge of his duty, knows but one person in all the world, and that person is his client. To save that client by all means and expedients, and at all hazards and costs to other persons, and, amongst them, to himself, is his first and only duty; and in performing this duty he must not regard the  alarm, the torments, the destruction which he may bring upon others. Separating the duty of a patriot from that of an advocate, he must go on reckless of consequences, though it should be his unhappy fate to involve his country in confusion."


This same philosophy almost all advocates in Indian legal system follows; some are expressive in internet forums some are diplomatic but heart to heart they do follow only adversarial advocacy. This is ethically justified because as long as the lawyers for all parties in any action or matter act adversarially in the narrow interests of their own client, it is said that the legal system will make sure the right outcome ensues. Indeed, I believe that - for lawyers to act otherwise - that is, to judge potential clients before they have had their 'day in court' - would be a presumptuous denial of justice to anyone who wants to use our legal system. Ours is a country follower of common law country system and I am a product of same so I cannot think otherwise.


You have no case in hand except time pass for, by and with me - well I will not fail you Lady as it is my only dharma – try harder periods will start the next time. PERIOD

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