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uttara (principal)     02 February 2011

need ur help...urgent ... plz help

This case is of my sister and brother-in-lw. i m describing my sis as 'wife' and brthr-in-law as 'husband'.

1. my sis is being harassed by her inlws (for low stndrd clothes/shagun in marriage), since after few dayz of mariage. but she kept quiet. afetr few weeks, behaviour of husband also became rude. attractd towards his female colleagues a lot. when my sis asked for his behaviour, he satrted beating up my sis.

2. my sis concievd after 7 months of mrg. thining of fact that may be husband would improve. but no not at all. husband started beatng up daily. and told that his family dont want the child. once i went to see my sister. my brthr-in-law sent her with me, against her wishes.

3. husband went out of india on project. wife agve birth to daughter at her parents home. once inlaws came to see the child, but didnt take my sis/child back. husband came after 3 months. wife went with him to inlaws home, whereshe was misbehaved. she returnd back after few dayz, as husband is gng to abroad official project.

4. now fater 4 years, he never acme back. once wife asked for money for child. he said i dnt have money, u join job. wife joind job.

5. after waiting for 4 years, now few months back we filed a complaint in CAW cell. whre husband gave a writtn ststement that he wants divorce, althugh wife gave writtn sttmnt taht she wants to go back wid husband. but hubby denied. after pressurzng, wife agreed for divorce but demanded 30 lacs for daughter.

6. husband said he prefer to die rather tahn take wife back, reason he gave- why wife filed complnt against him or his family? 

7. as they are not agreeyng for 30 lacs, police is gng to file FIR on basis of our complaint.

8. wat should we do. wheether we shuld file court acse or shuld wait for FIR?

9. can we file court acse simultenously as FIR is being lodged soon?

Husband is earning 1.65 lacs per month, plus 3 flats and wife is earning 35k per month (salry incrsd two months before 6t pay cmssn, previously 21000)

wat is the fault of my sis, who even kept quiet just to save her matrimonial life???

suggest me wat should we do???


 27 Replies

Legal Fighter (Advocate)     02 February 2011

it depends as what do u want. if you want ur sister to be around courts figthing court cases, go for FIR and other court cases. if you, ur sister and family want peace, then better to go for mutual settlement. as ur sister is also earning, she can maintain herself and proceed with her life. I think that u must be thinking about ur sister's future life also and not just the money which u are demanding.

Mallik Karra (Done with AIBE)     02 February 2011

File a DV case, let your sister get in to the house hold where she lived after marriage... 30 laks is a pittance based on the financial stability of your BIL, demand more..... although your sister is able to sustain with her salary, the child's responsibility is on the father too... get a good lawyer

2 Like

uttara (principal)     02 February 2011

i personally feel that there shuld be no divorce granted after birth of  a child, unless until a major crime is done by wife/husband.

the guilty should be punished very hard, so taht other people will never ever think to harass wife/hubby

the bad people should be punished in front of world.

it is kalyug, where krishan ji will not apper to escape droupadi, its al we... we have to save our sisters/brothers (no gender bias, punish whoever is guilty wthethr wife or husband)

punishment/some lacs of money is nothing compensatn for a persons whose life becomes hell due to hubby/wife. and wat about the child???

where child will go...why husband needs divorce when even his wife gave birth to a child...????


1 Like

Mallik Karra (Done with AIBE)     02 February 2011

Well, these are laws and ofcourse they can be changed, but for your 1st query per existing laws my above post is one of the ways you can fight...


on the other hand, i understand your anguish and what your family must be going thru.... sorry.

1 Like

Anup Hadgaonkar (Advocate)     02 February 2011

though  ur sis earning 35k. then and then as per law, to maintain child it is an responciblity of both, i.e. husband or wife. u can know d door of law, for  justice. realy if think dat, unjustice caused with ur sis, den u just take the help of well known lawyer, and go 2 the court. law is much more favour in women, definatly u will get proper justice...........

shyam pareek (advocate)     02 February 2011

i am agree anupji advocate.



I agree with you.  You are on right track and hope you will succeed.




1 Like

Anup Hadgaonkar (Advocate)     02 February 2011

Uttaraji, i m not agree with ur 2nd statement  that, no divorce granted after birth of  a child, unless until a major crime is done by wife/husband........................ totly wrong

plz u just mention ur relision and state

uttara (principal)     03 February 2011

i feel when a wife gave birth to child, then its responsibility of both husband and wife to give him/her love, care and protection. when such divorce cases arises, child is the main sufferer. she needs both papa and mumma. these dayz some people consider marriage as a game, first they marry, tehn if it is not up to their expectn, file divorce case, throw few thousands/lacs of money on her/his face, then free for re-marriage....nad cycle repeats again n again.

it is krishan ji will not appear to save draupadi...its all we...we hav to save our sisters/brothrs. (no gender bias, punishment shuld be given to either husband/or wife, whoever is guilty)

if these dowry seekers once punished hard, it'll set example for others, no one will even try to ditch their husbands/wives without any fault.

in our case, my sis kept quiet for almost 5 years just to save matrimonial life. and started job just to maintain herself n little kid. and the brothr-in-law gave teh reason for divorce is - y my sis filed complaint aganst him/his family?

yes divorec should be there in those cases where hubby/wife commited a major crime, proved characterless, not ready to concieve (without any logical reason), beaten hard daily or something that is logical. 


Its very sad reading all this.

Sometimes why all these things happened to you?

Ok, one one side its moral duty as you said," Its responsibility of both husband and wife to give him/her love, care and protection."

on other side you said,"it is krishan ji will not appear to save draupadi'

i know and lci member also know the fact that ,Its responsibility of both husband and wife to give him/her love, care and protection.

But earlier i said,There is no law which comple to husband or wife to join matrimonial life.

But have a faith in yourself.

utpala kaur 

earlier have the case here it is:



One of my friend who was cheated by her hubby and deserted her with two kids for some other girl got residence order under DV Act.

She could not take decision of divorce as her 5 years old daughter was used by hubby and her in laws as social tool to hide extra marital affair of their son.The jolly child became too introvert when they were left alone by the father.But the father used to take her sometime and instigated her against her mother.She started to keep silence while with mother as she was too much attached to her father after birth of her sister .

Seeing her daughter's condition my friend filed DV case when her hubby , MIL and BIL did not allow her to enter the newly constructed home . She left the house and took a rented house so that house could re-constructed for her BIL marriage.

By the way she is very happy now as her daughters always getting their father to meet and play.


Ambika (NA)     03 February 2011

Uttara, what do you mean by major crime. Do you think violence is beating only? Violence can be in very many forms which are invisible to the world: psychologically and emotional torture, belittling in hundred small way a partner,  which would kill one everyday and yet when there are no tale tell sign on the body, it would not be considered a major crime....A person can remain very gentle and pleasing in the eyes of the world, but can still break the spirit of the partner by not so major( beating) crime...a berating laughter, a turning away face, a silence which is arrogant, making a place dirty intentionally on a daily basis to intentionally see a partner mops again and again....when gone through on everyday basis, kills one slowly and inflicts wounds not on flesh but on psyche. Just because one has a child, does not mean one does not have responsibility towards oneself. So many couples may be living together because of the children, but they may be dead from within with lot of scars on their soul. 

Prabakkar sir, I do not agree with you here, though I have gained immense respect for you as I am still going through various threads of this forum. 

1 Like

Roshni B.. (For justice and dignity)     03 February 2011

In which country is your brother inlaw living?

If he's in USA,DV Act is recognized v.well there.Infact,in many countries.

I was once told by a lawyer that filing DV case against an NRI  or work permit holder is more effective than 498A,since it's recognized in all countries while dowry harassment(498A case) is lenthy and also not recognized abroad,since "dowry" is an unknown term to foreigners.So, summons will be sent to the indian embassy of the country where he lives thru MM,via MEA or better thru Ministry of OAverseas Indians.

If he doesnt turn up,his passport can be impounded by the embassy.

So DV will be faster remedy than 498A.Still u need to clarify this from an expert.

If u file DV,you have the option of not divorcing him,rather getting residence orders in his flat,if he refuses to take u abroad.before getting orders 4 residence,ask MM to pass such orders that he doesnt sell his flats.

u can also seek maintenance for urself and daughter,compensation for agony etc.

if u want divorce,u may seek alimony at par with his status.




2 Like

Ambika (NA)     03 February 2011

Very well explained by Roshni 

uttara (principal)     03 February 2011

@kushan ji: i said parents responsibilty to provide loev  care n protectn to context that child needs both father n mother, i said "in kalyg krishan ji will not appear" i mean to say..if someone did bad with somebody intentionally then we should not spare him/ somepeople suggest...if u go for courtcases, maintennce, you will waste time of ur sister, yes we know time will be wasted, but if we dont try to punish teh guilty, he will never improve and next time ruin the life of some other girl....i saw my sister disturbed, i saw her crying daily, i saw her going to job just for maintnng and nourshing her little daughter, still she wants to go back to his husband just to provide love of father to her child. but husband denies. he wants divorce.

@roshni ji: my brother-in-law lives in banglore

i feel if either wife / husband is disagree for divorce, minor child is also there out of their wedlock, and reason of filing divorce case id that - she doesnt respect inlaws, she doesnt make a cup of tea for inlaws,....

u people tell--- if inlaws daily harass the daughte in law by insulting her parents, or saying that her parents are cunning and clever, as thy didnt give much to their expectn, then how can daughter in law respect them truly by heart.... as husband daily argues with wife's parents, how can wife worship his parents....if she says plz dnt insult my parents, she was beaten up... wat if husband demands that wife's parents should give their home to their son-in-law....  

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