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Computer_xp1   24 July 2015

Need guidence

Hi Sir,

             I was a only kid to my parents and well studied and well setteled s/f professional, during 2010, i saw one girl and later rejected due to fairness, she pinged me online and my father insisted that she is good proposal and i married her. after a week, the actual things started in my life, my wife shouts and fights with me for small small things and goes to parents house and later some panchayath and later she comes back and looks after me well for some time, again it repeats same, last time, i took transfer to other city away from my inlaws and we were able to live happy for a period of one year.I thought of returing back to blr and again my inlaws started putting some quarrels between us by interveeing in my family matters.

                                                                 I have one girl child and second one carrying, recently when we were searching for another rent house mywife and me gave advance to some house and next day my father inlaw came and told some vasthu issue and made my wife to fight again, she left to parents house.

                              this has happen more than 5 times, i came to know later that my mother inlwaw has some mental issue and she used to leave my father inlaw similar to the way my wife is doing currenly.

earlier fight i lost control and in anger i had hit her but now knowingly done any thing ,  later when we 

were in other city, we were happy or better than blr( inlwas home town).My wife is jealous of her brother since my father inlaw has given most of his property to him. I have not taken and we have clearly stated that we dont want a penny from them.

                                                    Now my father inlaw wants me to stay my wife near to his home and i am afraid she will do more such kind of fights in future.

my wife who is affectinate in normal time, when ever she comes to he parents house she says her father will decide.

Its been 4.5 years and one 2.5 yr girl kid and 5 months carrying baby in her stomach I have seen 40 years or tourture in 4 yreas. 

my father tells me to adjust and every time we fight for silly reasons created by my inlaws.

my borther inlaw marriage is goinf to happen in next year feb, will this marriage bring some solution to my family life.

Please guide me how to handle the situation.

thanks in advance

  



 4 Replies

prabhakar advocate (advocate)     24 July 2015

If your job is transferable, get yourself transfered to far place and take your wife and children and live happily.  Come back for occasional visist  to your and her parents' home only for one week in a year.

Computer_xp1   24 July 2015

Hi Sir,

           The issue, when i took transfer last time, i was in that company for 4 years , recently i changed my job and came to place where i started.It will be difficult to do same again, i took a house loan recently also.

My inlwas will interfear in all our matters and create trouble and make our life horrible. My parents doesnt want to stay with me now, thinking she will again fight when they stay with me.

my wife is graduate and educated and mother of two, i wounder why she wants to make life hell.She wants me to be in her hands and play.

and unfortunately, i dont have any other world except my family.

 Do men have to suffer since we were born in India and the constitution is pro women?

Regards,

Pavan 

ADVOCATE DIMPLE JINDAL (Advocate)     24 July 2015

Bhiaya, yehi to hai kahani ghar ghar ki. Try to keep your wife in your confidence and occassionaly try to keep her happy. Sometimes, go for outing with your family in weekend's. You will see, situations changes after some times. Do not show her, that you want to keep her away from her paternal house. By any mean, if you get success to pass 3 - 4 more years distant from your in - laws house and your wife remains normal in that period, then the whole situation will be changed. This is the real fact of life.    

Nitin (marketting manager)     24 July 2015

Its a typical Indian family,this happens in every house ,recently Bombay high court gave a statement that Mother in law and Father in law shouldNOT interfere in couples life,

so try to handle situation in a way that she should feel responsible for all that she is doing, 

you must make her such a way that every decission of her is Costly for her and keep track of all the expenses in the houses and make her a house owner,then she will realize that its her house and she is spoiling that.,you just relax, do your job and give all the money through net banking as a proof, incuding the household expenses, just main tain a dairy, once she knows that everything is getting recorded she will stop all these games.

  Indian constitution is Pro Women that does not mean Indian constitution HATES MEN, so dont worry,record everything and prove she is wrong,so even if some thing goes wrog in future you will have proofs that she is the Culprit,start it with money matters.

Have a happy life

Rgds,

Nitin.


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