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sona misti (na)     09 November 2014

Husband to file divorce case or rcr?

  • sir i got married 15th jan 2014 by registered marriage then by hindu rituals on 3rd feb. we live westbengal,hoogly. but after our honeymoon our problem started. my husband is a state govt officer and live northbengal. my inlaws live near calcutta. he is the only child of his parents. same as i.but i am not working studying m.ed .. their was continued problems due to over interfere of my inlaws. my mil such dominating women absued me and even once hit me.. after my marriage my inlaws said i cannot continue study . but my husband agreed. now on 12th july he left me to my parents home for my exm.. my last exm was on 10th aug but it prosponed to 24th aug. my father asked my fil to give permission for staying he disagree and said that we are lier and havenot told that i will study..and said so much bad things. then my mother called and request him he again disagree. then my mother called my husband and i talk with him .. said u knew my exm prosponed. he agreed. next day y mother called him he said talk to my father, my mother talk with him and told him plz send him on 24th he will pick me. hes aid again bad things and say i use my husband for my own benefits and donot listen their and said he will tell later and cut the phone.i was so angry to hear this and stoped talking with my husband. he also didnt called me. after 24th my father told his father plz take me he said a list of falls about me father also said i also tell u what ur son did. and after hearing he cut the phone. next day hubby called me and we his father told my father such lies. then we both stopped talking. after 10days his parents send letter by rg post saying why i left my husband. i always do this. they always come to me and pleade to me to go back to their son. and i donot care about their and his sons feelings!!!!!!!!!1 i was shocked like what the hell is this. they never came.. when my mother send me after quarrel they told i went to their feet. then again they send a reminder with xerox of previous letter. next i answered saying i will go back just send my husbandas my parents are old enough and pacemaker and insulin dependent patient. and my husband live north bengal,he never come to pick me never. always my father went to their station to drop me with my luggage.even not attending jAMAISATHI, why he is not contacting me . also wrote that despite my mil's slap and her humiliation i have not told anyone.then they send a 6 page long letter saying i am a lier .my husband has no time to pick me as he is busy officer.and i used my husband he bought me watch, mobile , i overused nescafe, amul spray, rice,dal etc. i bought dresses like i never were before my marriage. they also said bad things about my parents profession like medicine shopkeeper is not a doctor as my husband is a doctor! and said change urself otherwise will not take back u. then after few days their lawyer called me to go to her firm and said his version is otherwise from his parents. i said no its nothing big just told him to talk and take me. then i send letter to him just telling that i love u and take me plz come.he wrote yesterday that after hearing they have lawyear my love has reiginated and wrote he is not interested in this marriage and his lawyear will take action. i also send a letter to their parents about their 6 page long accusition. what to do plz help.will they file divorce or rcr? ihave some recorded telephonicconversation as proof. if they file case can i use those?


 39 Replies

Kappil Cchandna (Expert Bail & Criminal Defence Lawyer at Delhi Supreme Court of India)     09 November 2014

Dear, First make your mind, u want to continue your marriage or not? Adv kapil chandna, 9899011450
1 Like

Kappil Cchandna (Expert Bail & Criminal Defence Lawyer at Delhi Supreme Court of India)     09 November 2014

He cannot file divorcee before 1of marraige, at mad update
1 Like

Kappil Cchandna (Expert Bail & Criminal Defence Lawyer at Delhi Supreme Court of India)     09 November 2014

He cannot file divorcee before 1of marraige, at mad update

Kappil Cchandna (Expert Bail & Criminal Defence Lawyer at Delhi Supreme Court of India)     09 November 2014

At max he will file RCR.

prakash chandra jain (proprietor.)     09 November 2014

dear.written my advice-1-action u/s125 2--domestic violence act and lastly divorce u/s 13,24 and25 h.m.act.

1 Like

Adv. Chandrasekhar (Advocate)     09 November 2014

No. Madam.  Do not take any legal action.  Your husband is a very good person.  You are also a sweet natured person.  The problems those are coming in your matrimonial life is not due to your husband nor due to your ego or bad behaviour.  If his parents are matured enough, there would have been no problems.  If your parents are tactful enough,  the problems could have been solved.  What is required is a matured person, who can enjoy the confidence of yourself and your husband and mediate and make both of you to understand how to ward off the external influence in your marriage life.  If you are getting permission from your husband to stay at your  parents house and continue to study and prolong your stay due to postponement of your examination - your husband was good enough to say o.k., even his parents refused for all these things.  He must have been heckled by his parents for being henpecked.  Even then, he accepted your request.  You should understand his difficult situation.  Now, what I propose is that stop sending this letter or that letter and send someone - very near relative, like your mama (mother's brother) or chacha (father's brother), who is matured enough, to him directly (not to his parents) and talk to him and fix a date for you to go to his home (north bengal).  On that date, instead of waiting that he would come and take you, you go along with uncle to his place and start to stay with him.  You do not file any criminal case or civil case.  there is no need for that.  You both can live very happily, if you learn to nod for every thing what your parents (both your and his) say but you both live your life together.  By the way, as he is working far away from his parents' house, and your matrimonial place is where husband is working.  So, there should be no problem.

2 Like

sona misti (na)     09 November 2014

my didi and relatives told me not to file cases.cause i wanted this marriage. i am a middle class women and a small town girl from a joint family where being a divorcee is not feel good. but i am now devasted after seeing the languages of those letters!!!! i can expect such humilating letter from his parents.. but not from him. he said such bad things and lied why my mother told him that i will stay to my paternal house for more than 15 days ..if we have decided this decision then why this drama to inform him or them. then said i never wanted to live with him. i have not contacted him then how could he know my intention. i have cut his phn so he has no other option to consult doctor. and said u r saying my mother bad behave.. think about ur behave. u always made food with more masala and oil when i said not to u shouted. if ur parents are sick then how come he does business! if so then why before coming i donot take his permission. during may i had come for my uncle's wedding ..he drop me to my rlwy stn then after that i told him to pick me after 2-3 days and told him my father want to talk with u.he said he will come next week during vote. but again he said he has no time he went to his job place. next he called me to go rlwy station of his home i said i cannot go with those luggages at night and told him plz come my father want to talk with u and take me home. he argued . then my mother told him plz come and take her as my father always drop me so my relatives ask why ur soninlaw never come? he said he will say after talking to his parents. then stop talking my mother asked after 3 days why have not u come? and come for jamaisasthi. he said he will not and said bad things. then i called and asked will u not come he said no first u come then i will go..then my mother send me . their my mil abused i went to his jobplace with him there he said i went to their feet.if they didnot take me back i had no other was such derogetory . thats why when this time this happened again they said he is busy and told to drop my parents i got angry.why always them? if i go they say those things again.thats why i stopped calling and want him to call back but his parents send me letters!!

sona misti (na)     09 November 2014

sry apology not doctor its lawyer

i do not want to file case first. waiting if he does. but after jan will they file divorce or RCR i want to know.

i think he will put blame like i do not live or want to live with him. and say i did bad things in his job place like not make his tea, not sleeping with him..always shout u know his father told this lies to my father and i was shocked. how come a father say this!

f they file case other wise what proof can he show ?

and one question our phone conversation can i submit as proof?

naveen (business)     10 November 2014

Hi sona,

U Better consult to any eldelry relatives who can talk in fever of u and convince ur husband and talk to his parents to save ur married life, in most of the cases usually women miss use laws against her husband

but u seems to be good cultured person and u never thought in that sense to harm them. 

Instead afraid if they fie such case wat to do.  Dont think too much about rcr or divorce as of now, 

If u really want him than call and talk to ur husband once if he also interested he will tak in smooth way

If at all u going to ur hubby house dont go alone go with some elders. 

If u dont wann lead life with him, than wait and see wat he can do in near future

For any suggestion call on 09886860126

1 Like

sona misti (na)     10 November 2014

but the problem is if i contact and go they will think again that i will have no other option ..and started taunting me again. and make my life miserable. my father worrying if i cannot bear all the taunt i may hurt myself as i am very emotional sentimental girl.

naveen (business)     10 November 2014

Hi sona,

U seems to be well behaved and decent person , who respect family bindings.

Yes i can understand ur problem and they may mis use ur retrun and treat u even harshly,

If ur husband is good nd u can trust him than go with elderly mediator who can convince both together

and i hope their on no such problem arises. . If u feel their is threat to ur life nd in mental stress some wrong decision u may take than please u dont go and wait for their move.

If lodge any case than defend that and u apply for RCR in ur place, and prove in the court that u r

willing to lead married life with him and they are creating trouble to u in many ways which all u noted

here. If u fail to prove ur stand than divorce will be granted . if it happens so u should be happy that ur

life has saved from such in humane heartless people. Now trend has changed and its not so difficult to

get marry after divorce but one should choose right person and take proper decision.

1 Like

Adv. Chandrasekhar (Advocate)     10 November 2014

Your and your father's apprehensions are quite understandable.  That is why, I advised you to take the help of some family elder, who can make you and your husband to understand the facts of life.  Do not forget, I read your lengthy query.  You should also be told some things, though they may hurt you, so that your matrimonial life can be peaceful in future.  Only matured elder can explain those things.  Next, you should clearly understand two things.  That your husband is not bad, as a matter of fact he is very good.  Why I am saying this is because despite his parents' protest, he allowed you to go and continue your studies.  But, in Indian society, a boy either agrees or not, sing the same song what his parents say.  So, do not take what he is saying at face value.  Do not allow small things like he did not come to the station and did not meet your father etc. to spoil your marriage life.  People have got their own habits and attitudes.  You cannot expect, everyone including your husband should behave just you wish.  Life does not run in such way.  Regarding the legal notice and the totally false allegations in those notices, those were drafted by the advocate.  Even though it was drafted according to your inlaws' dictation, some of the advocates add spice to bring successful result if the case goes to court.  So, just ignore them.  Do not spoil your mind.  Next, very important thing is that your husband is working in North Bengal, where as your inlaws are staying in Calcutta.  You should insist that you would go and stay with your husband.  Occasional visit to inlaws is o.k.  but refuse to stay with them for longer period.  Because, the narration shows that they are the real trouble makers.


1 Like

naveen (business)     10 November 2014

respected chandrashekkhar sir

You have narrated every thing in detail to save her married life,

Both the party should understand real facts of life one should not take un due advantage of laws,

Most of the time women mis use the laws which just made to safe gaurd them from cruel in humane.

This story is totally different, I too suggest same thing. Last line is not acceptable, she should wel behave and take care of her in laws to win their confidence. Te problem arises when wife does not care in laws or not talk to them properly. All parents want their son should care and listen to them even after marriage. 

Sona, now  u should think wat to do to resolve all problem and unhappy moments, here many wil post their views as they think, but u consider the best opinion to settle ur life once again to have smile on ur face.

Kindly feel free to cal for any suggestions: 


1 Like

sona misti (na)     11 November 2014

but my father's lawyer friend saying if u go and talk they will more likely do the same thing again., then u should not first hand replied their letter. but i was like if i had not and went back to their place they would haVE said u came as we indirectly threatened u. and there would have been a proof that i always desert them and do not want to live with my husband., they always pleade me.henceforth they can use those letter as their safeguard or desertion or mental cruelty ground. but they got scared as i said my MIL slapped still i did not tell outsider and my mil taunts me. despite that i want to live with my husband ,plz send him.then they replied 6 page long acusation and now saying they r not interested. in each letter they are indirectly therening like if donot follow lawyer will take action.and my husband is headless stupid immature stubborn man who donot know how to mannage a marriage and balance it . he do everything as per his parents wish. if my elder talk he will say first my parents will talk! he always like that. uncle is saying eitherwait for them or file 125crpc as he is not taking u and ur housewife

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