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murthy addala (vice president projects)     12 June 2012

Son's visitation

Dear sirs

Iam 42 year engineer jailed for 3 months because I am an employee of a company booked for fraud and cheating by police. Now out on bail and started working again in another projects company. My wife to whom I got married to in 1999 is a state govt school teacher . I have a 12 year old son. Now I was prevented from seeing my son from last 8 months. I suffered a massive heart attack also due to anxiety to see my son. I understand from reliable sources that my wife is planning from divorce. How do I live with my wife. In the worst case will I be granted visiting rights to see my son and take care of him. 



Learning

 15 Replies

MRRpersonality (Knows very little about Indian laws)     12 June 2012

How are you prevented from seeing your child ?   Are you already divorced ?  

manish (cdsdfasd sdf)     12 June 2012

file case asap under guardian and wards act. you will be provided visitation. the extent of visitation will be determined by court once they speak to your kid as he is old enough. You will definitely get visitation.

murthy addala (vice president projects)     13 June 2012

Sir Iam not divorced yet. But since my son is with my wife for last 9 months will there is every chance of him being influenced to say no to my custody and visitation if asked by the judge. in that case what is the chance of visitation sir.  

MRRpersonality (Knows very little about Indian laws)     13 June 2012

We cant tell what your son will tell the judge.  But you will definitely be allowed to meet your son in the court premises to begin with.  You can build relationship slowly.   You may be given custody of the child if you are proved to be a good father.

murthy addala (vice president projects)     13 June 2012

Thanks a lot Thats Morale booster. I dont intend to separate my son from his mother. I want to also share responsibilities of his as a father. I turned into a teetoteller for my wife and son. Let me share some things with you. My father inlaw's elder sister is a divorcee and lives with them. My wife's elder sister got divorced twice. This trigger of hatred towards who ever walk into their lifes is not new. Will this work in my favor. Please if possible suggest me a lawyer expert in family matters to fight my case in hyderabad court.

MRRpersonality (Knows very little about Indian laws)     13 June 2012

It seems your wife is living in a bad environment, as is your son.  Not definitely healthy for your son.  Unfortunately the courts can not do anything more than providing you some visitation rights here.  

 

You look like a very good person with love for your child.  For the sake of love towards your son, did you try to reconcile your marriage in any way ?   It is easier to change your wife's attitude and create interest in her own marital family once she starts living with you.   She needs to understand the value of a healthy family and the importance of a responsible  father in the family.

 

When did you get separated ?   There are millions of families out there where both parents love their children but not each other and live their lives somehow.   As time progress, lot of issues can be sorted out and children influence a lot in the family matters.

 

You mentioned your wife is trying for divorce.   If so, use that opportunity to go to the mediation cell and show your interest to save your marriage for the sake of your son.   Who knows, with all the counselling she might change.  Also once she comes home, she might change good for the sake of son.  Never ever show your irritation or get upset with her action just for the sake of your son.

 

Alternatively you can file for Restitution of Conjugal Rights S.9 of HMA and request her to come and join you.  It may be initially hard, but if things can be worked through mediators and counsellors it will work good.   I am not from Hyderabad, so I do not know directly any advocate.   Someone from this forum might be able to suggest you a good advocate.  

Adv. Chandrasekhar (Advocate)     13 June 2012

file custody case and in that file visitation rights application as interim relief.  your son is 12 years old.  so you will get visitation rights definitely and also if you hard bargain, you may get vacation custody of your child.  Vacation custody means, on week ends you may get custody. And also you may get custody on summer and winter vacations.  I do not know any advocate in Hyd. to assist you in your matter.

murthy addala (vice president projects)     13 June 2012

Sir My friends tried very hard to convince her to live with me by explaining that I was not guilty in the matter where in I was alleged, Since they have seen the case papers. Instead of looking at the facts and concluded she has been telling the mediators that she knows about me and asking them to be away from me. Sir I never had any kind of criminal record till day.Even my present boss employed me despite knowing everything I had gone through since he believes that I am innocent. I dont know where from she drew a conclusion that Iam a criminal. These cases in which I was imprisoned are all typical cheating cases on my ex-boss with allegations on me and other employees, which are all fabricated. Even My wife nor their family members turned up when I was admitted in the hospital with heart stroke . At that juncture I lost hope of any reconciliation of my marriage. I was also adviced by a well wisher to file restitution of conjugal rights but will that help? Recently my wife started calling my friend and asked my postal address by trying to show a lot of concern about my health.Even though my friend had been asking her to call me on my number and even promised her to bring me to her home she is hell bent on my postal address. She is calling him from different landline numbers instead of her cell. This is raising doubts that she wants to send in some legal notices. .One more thing about my wife's family which I would like to share they believe in a guru (a Lady) whom they believe have divine powers and this lady determines every step and action they have to take. she is such an influencer where in she insists on her disciples to come to her for every petty issue and threatens them with dire results if any one take s a decision with out her approval and consent. More over some of the lawyers known to me are discouraging me by telling me straight that custody of a child cannot be given to the father till the child turns 18. And visitation rights will not be granted if the child says he would not like to meet me. I am not sure what my child was told about me and my present status. However he is a kid of 12 years and can be easily influenced. Please advice Iam running out of time. I have to proceed legally before I lose my son forever.

Adv. Chandrasekhar (Advocate)     13 June 2012

I differ with the views expressed by your advocates about child custody and visitation rights.  I reiterate my advice.

murthy addala (vice president projects)     13 June 2012

Thank you very much. I will visit my father in law's place today and will try to request them to join me with my wife and son. If they dont agree will proceed legally. If possible please advice upon a good advocate here in Hyderabad.

MRRpersonality (Knows very little about Indian laws)     13 June 2012

This is the correct first step.  Please do visit them, be polite and nice and show them your love for the child and your interest in restoring the marriage.  In this process you will see your son as well and you will endear him because you are trying to restore your family.   Please give them some time to think over, then try one more time with the help of your polite friends.   If that fails go ahead and try custody petition asking for atleast visitation and/or vacation rights.  You should also try to restore your marriage via RCR and the court will try to get you mediators who will help you get your wife convinced about the marriage.  Be a nice father, and your son will realize that you are a good father.  He will allow for visitation.   

 

Your advocates are wrong.  Once your son turns 18 he is an adult and the question of custody does not arise.  He will be on his own.

murthy addala (vice president projects)     15 June 2012

Sir 

I had visited them and met with my wife. Despite repeated persuasions they are hell bent on divorce and they dont want to show my son to me at all. over and above my claims that she has told my son everything about my jail term and he is not willing to live with me. In that case will the visitation rights get affected, They had changed his school without my knowledge and doesnt want to reveal his whereabouts at all.  

MRRpersonality (Knows very little about Indian laws)     15 June 2012

You will get visitation rights atleast in the court premises.  You would have got atleast custody during school vacation times if your son is somewhat willing.   Try to get few visits atleast at the court premises.  Give him some presents and talk to him nicely and tell him the truth.  As the time progresses, he would realize that you are a good father.  If she is hell bent on divorce then let the process begin instead of going through this every day harassment.   

Shonee Kapoor (Legal Evangelist - TRIPAKSHA)     15 June 2012

When all other recourses fail and war is the only option, the warrior should not be afriad of the same.

 

File for child custody and visitation, and contest the divorce case with full force when she files for it.

 


Regards,
 
Shonee Kapoor
harassed.by.498a@gmail.com

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