Kindly help - Shall wait or go for legal notice and RCR asap?

Legal Evangelist - TRIPAKSHA

Jeevan,

 

Be patient, there is no point speculating, situation would clear itself.

 

Don't force or tax yourself too much

 

Regards,

 

Shonee Kapoor

harassed.by.498a@gmail.com


Total likes : 1 times

 
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Dear Jeevan,

 

I don’t think so that your wife is staying away with her child….. Because in this universe no any mother can stay away from her child without a strong reason….. I think you should investigate the truth… According to me she is  just conveying this message to hurt you, because baby is the weapon for her with the help of emotions towards that baby she is trying to hurt you so that you will bend down on your knees and surrender… Again I am saying find the truth.

 

& If she is really keeping away from the child then to hell with her…. Forget her forever.

 

Actually One of our member has the similar problem like you so I had given him very detailed suggestion …. So I am copying & pasting the same here…. Please  go through it.

 

 

Dear Jeevan,

·         First of all be clear that exactly what you want 1) Divorce 2) Equal Compromise 3) They should bend down & Compromise 4) You will bend down & Compromise.

·         If you are thinking about Divorce then its not so easy….. To get the final destination of Divorce you will have to go through lots of painful stages like 498A, Domestic Violence, Etc. Don’t hurry-up to see the gate of court otherwise you will waste your whole life in court premises only.

·         Now legally she is your wife then however her background and family you must accept her. You should had to do this investigation b4 marriage not now. Most important ask your parents too “NOT TO LOSE THE TEMPER” & suggest them to play this game with a cool mind, cool words & unbeatable strategies. This affects a lot. Each & every word you & your family will speak in front of relative & other people that should be a part of well planned strategies. Never show any fault from your side.

·         I will strictly suggest you don’t go for RCR also it is an invitation for hell. RCR is sign of coward. Prove that whatever steps they take against you have the dare to defense it.

·         Don’t worry if she comes back then be aware of their intention & behave properly. Go for lots of reading on this topic, give her so much love but be sticked with your morals & principles, take her to your friends & relatives. (But forget about the teaching of lesson to her or your in-laws) Its very slow process (we can discuss about this process in detail once she comes back) but with lots of faith and efforts you can make her internally forget to her parents she will be completely in your control and you can live in-laws free life. But the problem is how she will come back?

·         If you want them to bend down and surrender in front of you then 100% this is possible by the way of following:

·         Go directly to her for face to face meeting with lots of confidence (In Hercules Style) and ask her what she want? Is she really interested in saving your family? Behave very politely and but not romantic. Try to convince her peacefully. But don’t be agree on her unethical issues and don’t loose temper it will show your weakness.

·         I think she & her parents are interested to make you separate from your parents. If she puts this demand then clearly and with a cool mind say “NO! THIS IS NOT POSSIBLE AT ALL IN ANY CIRCUMSTANCES”. Assure her that she will not have any problem from you & your family but you will not leave your parents at any cost. If she comes then live happily if not then tell her clearly but not angrily that this is the last & final time you trying to save your family but second time you will not gonna come & convince her & then immediately leave from there. After this forget that you are married & live like a bachelor boy don’t even answer their calls until & unless they willingnessly come & surrender.  You have to make them realize that you don’t have any interest in them by keeping quiet. Trust me friend when neighbor, relatives & other people will start gossiping against them they will feel shy, her parents will think of committing suicide. Your wife cant go out and their life will be worse than Hell. This is the best punishment that you can give them ever.

·         Live peaceful life as I said in my last article concentrate on other things like career, higher studies, hobbies, meditation, lots of readings on this topic & create a great man out of this opportunity of loneliness as I said loneliness is a gift of God you can create a huge/great HERO out of yourself.

·         But don’t go for any legal steps as this is socio-family issue with having full of emotions don’t convert it into legal it will give you lots of trouble like false 498A, DV, etc. Be cool and just face whatever comes in front of you.

·         Don’t think about divorce also if it has to happen it will happen automatically. If you go with the proposal of divorce then as per law you will have to suffer a lot. Let her come with that proposal then you will no need to suffer any.

·         You just keep quiet and enjoy your life. This is her issue also let her take the decision of this issue then everything will happen as per your choice.

·         I think you are so innocent so they are just trying to provoke you and their intention is just to take the control on you & your family. Don’t be entrapped in their strategies.

·         Remember this is just a game of patience. Who have more patience he wins this battle. & who loses a temper he loses a battle.

Dear XYZ,

·         First of all be clear that exactly what you want 1) Divorce 2) Equal Compromise 3) They should bend down & Compromise 4) You will bend down & Compromise.

·         If you are thinking about Divorce then its not so easy….. To get the final destination of Divorce you will have to go through lots of painful stages like 498A, Domestic Violence, Etc. Don’t hurry-up to see the gate of court otherwise you will waste your whole life in court premises only.

·         Now legally she is your wife then however her background and family you must accept her. You should had to do this investigation b4 marriage not now. Most important ask your parents too “NOT TO LOSE THE TEMPER” & suggest them to play this game with a cool mind, cool words & unbeatable strategies. This affects a lot. Each & every word you & your family will speak in front of relative & other people that should be a part of well planned strategies. Never show any fault from your side.

·         I will strictly suggest you don’t go for RCR also it is an invitation for hell. RCR is sign of coward. Prove that whatever steps they take against you have the dare to defense it.

·         Don’t worry if she comes back then be aware of their intention & behave properly. Go for lots of reading on this topic, give her so much love but be sticked with your morals & principles, take her to your friends & relatives. (But forget about the teaching of lesson to her or your in-laws) Its very slow process (we can discuss about this process in detail once she comes back) but with lots of faith and efforts you can make her internally forget to her parents she will be completely in your control and you can live in-laws free life. But the problem is how she will come back?

·         If you want them to bend down and surrender in front of you then 100% this is possible by the way of following:

·         Go directly to her for face to face meeting with lots of confidence (In Hercules Style) and ask her what she want? Is she really interested in saving your family? Behave very politely and but not romantic. Try to convince her peacefully. But don’t be agree on her unethical issues and don’t loose temper it will show your weakness.

·         I think she & her parents are interested to make you separate from your parents. If she puts this demand then clearly and with a cool mind say “NO! THIS IS NOT POSSIBLE AT ALL IN ANY CIRCUMSTANCES”. Assure her that she will not have any problem from you & your family but you will not leave your parents at any cost. If she comes then live happily if not then tell her clearly but not angrily that this is the last & final time you trying to save your family but second time you will not gonna come & convince her & then immediately leave from there. After this forget that you are married & live like a bachelor boy don’t even answer their calls until & unless they willingnessly come & surrender.  You have to make them realize that you don’t have any interest in them by keeping quiet. Trust me friend when neighbor, relatives & other people will start gossiping against them they will feel shy, her parents will think of committing suicide. Your wife cant go out and their life will be worse than Hell. This is the best punishment that you can give them ever.

·         Live peaceful life as I said in my last article concentrate on other things like career, higher studies, hobbies, meditation, lots of readings on this topic & create a great man out of this opportunity of loneliness as I said loneliness is a gift of God you can create a huge/great HERO out of yourself.

·         But don’t go for any legal steps as this is socio-family issue with having full of emotions don’t convert it into legal it will give you lots of trouble like false 498A, DV, etc. Be cool and just face whatever comes in front of you.

·         Don’t think about divorce also if it has to happen it will happen automatically. If you go with the proposal of divorce then as per law you will have to suffer a lot. Let her come with that proposal then you will no need to suffer any.

·         You just keep quiet and enjoy your life. This is her issue also let her take the decision of this issue then everything will happen as per your choice.

·         I think you are so innocent so they are just trying to provoke you and their intention is just to take the control on you & your family. Don’t be entrapped in their strategies.

·         Remember this is just a game of patience. Who have more patience he wins this battle. & who loses a temper he loses a battle.

 

 


Total likes : 1 times

 
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sorry for mistakenly double posting the same text

 
Reply   
 

Dear all,

Thank you all for informing. Very kind of you. I followed your advise, but I am not worried about my own life.

I made her understand to come back 2 months back. She had left the baby at her parent's house. For over 2 months she stayed with me and she visited her parents in between in the pretext of making of them understand (which is another lie).

Her parents said she has made their face black (by coming back to my house). That is what she was telling and it is a lie. Everyday her mother will call her and mostly as I know will provoke to know what happened.

This week is my brother's marriage and after calling her constanly she refused to come. There is a baby boy and no one in my family have seen him for a long time and so I wanted her come.

Initially though she agreed, after talking to her mother, she refused to come. And started scolding my parents, sister, brothers and I was also forced to do so.

Then she hit me and made me injured (with blood coming out) and I in protest raised my hand. She immediately called Police in the pretext of she being abused. The police stayed for a long time and there also she was shouting. Finally, I let her go with the baby to some place. The police refused to take any action on me without filing an FIR. She was constantly asking them to arrest me. But the Bangalore police refused.

I do not if she had filed any FIR (and I do not fear jail for some days in false claim as life has been hell and I know I'll come back). After that the police came back and again they left as they had no proof.

Now I am clear:
 
 - I want a divorce for sure. No RCR, Legal Notice etc.

She is running away from it, though she said in front of the police she is agreeing to it. Now she is not picking up the phone and neither her father or mother. She is expected to play the dirty game.

I can not stay with her with constant harassment and she abuses my parents, sister and brothers, everyday. This happens regularly.

 - I want the baby to be safe and want undisturbed visiting rights. She never kept the baby with her and in one pretext or another she put the baby at her parent's house.

She will create problems in that also. The baby had cold, cough and she took by telling the police being the mother (you know how law typically favors women on it)

Kindly advise what to do. I am sure now I need divorce and need to know how should I proceed.

 
Reply   
 
Legal Evangelist - TRIPAKSHA

If you are sure, you want divorce, file for it.

 

We would worry about the cases as and when they come.

 

 

Regards,

 

Shonee Kapoor

harassed.by.498a@gmail.com


Total likes : 1 times

 
Reply   
 
SSE

 

@ Jeevan

I have already suggested you that you can deny her entering into your home. you should have let them take a legal step afterwards.  Now the case will now become more complex. Even if you have raised hand in protest, this can be converted into Domestic Violence.

Well, Still I suggest don’t accept her, Let them do whatever they wants. Waiting for just 2 months is not just enough. 

She is violent in nature. Don’t ever think that this marriage will ever be a happy marriage. Just Prepare yourself to face consequences.

Leave it up to FATE. Just give fight when they take legal step.


Total likes : 1 times

 
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Thank you so much. 

She wants control as I see. Along with her mother. She wants her mother to run my house. 

 

 - She does not to go to my parent's house or does not want anyone from my house to come here

 - She does not want to spend a single penny (she said she will take care of her parents with the money)

If the above things do not happen, she wants to stay with her mother or on her own. But, do not want to give any divorce. 

Now she is not taking any call. 

Please note that every time I talk of a mutual divorce, she will cry (drama) and then with crying eyes will let yes. I was used to melt down. Now after this incident I am very clear now. 

This is what I am thinking. 

 - I want to have the divorce. But after thinking calmly, I realize she may file 498a (which we all know is long, evil and stupid). I want her to make agree for a mutual divorce. This is where she is running away from though saying multiple times in front of police she wants it. 

But keeping calm on such matters, will only encourage her. She ONLY understands ONE LANGUAGE, FEAR and LEGAL ACTION. Other than that she has no respect for anything. 

 -  If she wants to keep the child, be it. I am fine with it. If she can not, I'll take care of him (it is a remote chance as she has constantly told the baby is missed by her parents)

What should I do?

 - Apply for an anticipatory bail and then file for divorce  -or -

 - Wait for a month and see how the situation goes and then take action -or- 

 - Directly go for divorce and ask for the custody of the child (i know she most probably will get it, but it will help in a good bargain) -or-

- File for an anticipatory bail and then go with the help of police to her place (i do not want any fight, but her mother brings the worst from any people some times by abusing) and make her understand for a mutual divorce. I do not know if police presence will intimidate her. She thinks police are nothing (as she is very immatured and has no idea of law) - or -

The most irritating thing here is no communication. Her parents and she do not take any calls and if anyone goes to the house they misbehave. They refuse to take any calls from their own relatives also. 

Basically I want to play it safe (as I respect my job, my life and my parent's life) and want to do it peacefully. 

How to proceed (as they do not want to have any form of communication) which will put some fear in her and let her know that the divorce case is now a 100% possibility without tempting her to do anything wrong?

I want to get rid of her as soon as possible (I'll most probably lose the baby boy, but have to bear it) and want to live my life. 

 
Reply   
 
SSE

If you cann't wait until they take legal step....

 

I would suggest Apply for Anticipatory Bail and go for Divorce. By looking into your case, There are chances that you will get divorce in your favour. There are chaces that they become ready to go for MCD. Hire some Senior Lawyer who can fight and present the case very well.

 

Dont think of Child Custody at the moment. 

 

I am at the same situation like you But I decided to wait. I have accepted it as my luck.

 
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Legal Evangelist - TRIPAKSHA

There is no point in repeating oneself.

 

 

Regards,

 

Shonee Kapoor

harassed.by.498a@gmail.com


Total likes : 1 times

 
Reply   
 

Dear all,

Thank you so much for your advices.

Could you please inform:

Under what ground will it be advisable to take Anticipatory Bail.

 

 
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