Desertion


Dear sirs

I am the husband and have filed divorce based on desertion cruelty after 2years of desertion. I have strong points like.

1. false NC in police station against the husband and his family. wife has not withdrawn the police case/nc

2. facebook chat by wife maligning the husband  after false NC.

After 1 year of desertion I started writing letters to my wife  stating  that  i am ready to forget everything  but you come back. But she did not come back instead she said that before coming she wants me to come to her house for reinstating confidence in her parents. thereafter she said she does not have faith in me. I could not go to her house because she had not withdrawn the NC/POLICE case.

My question is by my writing letters have i condoned the desertion or by just agreeing to conditionally come back the wife has broken the desertion. kindly clarify. The wife has not come back or has not tried to intiate anything. she has notwithdrawn the NC. I have tried to resolve the problem with the help of family members but still she did not come.


Regards

 
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Bangalore

Forget condone etc.  


You come and take me.

You come and talk to my parents, convince them.

And also put a list of conditions for you to accept or else... etc

These are common things which wives resort to.

Further they may threaten to file false cases if you do not accept their conditions are all common.

You out of fear of police wont go to her house, she out of ego wont call you and initiate talks.

Irrespective of what you have written in your letters, your wife has not joined you.  So the matter is still the same... i.e. she has deserted you, such letters what you have written can be used in court to show that you have tried to bring her back.  


Though you have applied for divorce, Even now, its not late, all proceedings are just on paper.., try to talk to her alone, meet her at a different place. IF she insists that you go to her parents house, then first go to jurisdiction police station, inform concerned office CI that you are going to visit your wife, they will call up your wife and inform the same about your visit.  Your approach should be this way.  And then talk it out.  Convince wife.  Your wife has just given one complaint which is non-cognizable in nature, so matters can be still resolved, unlike other women who have filed an array of cases like 498a, DV, etc.

Forget about facebook chats etc, facebook itself is nonsense.  You can however use such data via printout, by approaching nearest cyber crime branch, get a certified copy of it, and can use it in court in the future, if talks fail.




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sir

thanks for the reply.

We were married for 3 months and she was 3 months pregnant when she left after filing of NC/POLICE COMPLAINT.

After recieving divorce summons my wife has filed restitution of conjugal rights.

In this she has alleged false mental cruelty as the reason for filing of NC/POLICE complaint and leaving house. She has alleged false  mental cruelty, physical cruelty and dowry allegations before marriage and after marriage.

My question is that since she was already pregnant and we had s*xual relations till the morning that she had left.  Does that not mean she has condoned all acts of so called allegations.

regards

 
Reply   
 
Bangalore

You have filed divorce, she has filed RCR, both will go for trial some day.  RCR holds good only for 1 year.  Even if she wins RCR, no court can force you to take her back.  She might have made N number of allegations, but all such will stand only allegations till they are proved correct.  You have a good case.  She has deserted you, she has given police complaint against you, both of which amount to mental cruelty and are very good reasons to ask divorce.




But, as you got her pregnant, its your duty to bring her back, take her into confidence, take care of her, know her mind, convince her to lead happy marital life with you.  Its morally wrong to file divorce when you have gotten wife pregnant and is carrying your child. Simply there will be complications in near future, child, naming ceremony of child, paying alimony to wife, running behind getting proof of wife working from her employer, paying alimony to kid, kid will grow fatherless or in future will have new person father, kid not being able to come into terms with happenings around it, kid not being able to believe in married life are just a few things which are bound to happen in the future. Your wife also needs to understand the gravity of the situation, think as a family, you the unborn, and the wife.   Forget parents relatives etc, they come in the second  circle, and should not matter much now.




If at all you had used a condom [read contraceptive techniques], things would have been different, and suggestions would have been totally different.  Condom would have saved you from a lot of trouble.




Its now face the music.  All the best.  Keep in touch.



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sir

thanks for the reply.

she has already joined job and has mentioned in the rcr and she is also earning well and equivalent to me. the baby is 22 months old and is being taken care by her father. she has no intention to return.

she has alleged 12 pages of illtreatment before marriage and after marriage( married for 3 months only).then she is asking for rcr? does s*xual relation condone all acts of false cruelty before the act?

regards

 
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