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Azharuddin (Senior Software Enginner)     05 April 2014

Wife parents interference and threaten to kill me

Hello good people

I live in Hyderabad and aged 28 and got married 10 months back to a 23 year old girl. We did not ask for dowry nor did we take anything from girls parents. And when wedding was planned, we wanted them to host the ceremony in a decent function hall. This was the only thing we asked. Also for the wedding function, we asked her parents to gift me nice clothes to be worn in the function. They agreed and said they are happy to gift this.
But they kept on delaying so we thought they were not very keen so I bought it on my own. Also they did get a nice function and the party was held very nicely.

And from my side, the reception was done equally well. And to the girl, we gifted her 2 dresses worth 50K to be worn on wedding and reception. And gave her 14 tolas of gold as well. Though we did not ask girls parents for anything, they said they want to give few things for her daughter like bed, refrigerator, oven and other furniture. They sent us the list of items and asked us if we want anything else. Since we already have new refrigerator and air cooler at home, we asked them not to give this and rather give an AC and they happily obliged.

All was nice until in 5th month of her pregnancy she got complications and had to be aborted. Her mother started making false claims that because we deprived my wife of food and used to torture she got this complication. So on this topic we had a huge argument but neither her mother nor wife were ready to accept that they were making wrong claims. Also for bill payment in hospital which was around 35K, I said to her brother that as per company policy where I work where I work, wife is covered for all medical bills. But her brother said not a problem he will pay the bill for this time as usually it happens in Hyderbad that for first pregnancy, girls parents incur all the expenses.

Problem with my wife is she shares every thing which happens at my home to her parents and sisters who just fuels the situation rather than cooling of the things. So for this reason, I stopped  my wife in using the phone. And on another occasion, her dad came to my home for another argument and he threatened me for life. Post this I said to my wife that I will never speak or meet to her father.

Though I asked my wife not to use her personal phone, her father gave her another new phone to use at my home. My wife tried her best to hide it from me, but I caught her and then she promised that she will never use the phone. Things got normal for 2 months and we were planning for another pregnancy in next 2 months after our first wedding anniversary. For some trivial issue, my wife broke the promise and started using the phone. She was caught red handed by me and I scolded her a lot. While we were having this argument, my wife called her sister to ensure she listens whats happening me and my wife. This was all planned. The argument went little ahead when my wife was getting very temper I held her mouth to stop her shouting and in a rage I hit her slowly on her cheeks. And in return she hit me as well but hitting with a bottle. All this argument was heard by my wife's sister and her sister informed her father, brother and her uncles that I gonna kill my wife. But in reality me and wife calmed down after a while, and we went out for a long drive to discuss and resolve things between us rather than involving 10 members.

While were on long drive and when we both were getting normal after healty discussion, her uncles (one of them is in police crime branch) came to my home and since I was not available and went to my uncles home to argue with him. My uncle was not aware of any issue between me and my wife, so he said since Im unaware of any issue, lets hold off the discussion until me and wife reach home. But her uncles were so animated that they were making all wrong claims and threatened my life by either murdering me, getting me killed in an accident or filing a wrong dowry case against me. While we were on long drive, her father called my wife and my wife said him that all is resolved and there is no issue so plz send back her uncles without them having any discussion either with me or my uncle. So her father said ok, they wont argue with anything and will meet my uncle casually and go back, but in reality they had huge argument with my uncle for almost 2 hours. So me and my wife came back home after 2 hours with all resolved amicably between us but her uncles messed up all by having argument with my uncle by threatening to kill me or file a divorce case.

Another reality is wife is not bad at all, she understand what I try to explain her and what I expect from her. Even my mom tries to explain her how things can be mended with husband. My understands it but the moment she goes to her parents house she changes. Her mother,father and sisters are all culprit who just give my wife negative feedback about me or her in-laws. So my wife reacts wrongly to me after all the brainwash her parents do on her. Now she has gone to her parents house again and Im not sure if she wil return. Even if she I suspect her uncles will either file a case against me or my life would be in danger. 

In this situation, please let me know what can be done legally. I do not want to divorce her but all I want is less interference of her parents between me and my wife. And since my life is threatened can I do something. Please suggest.

 

 

 

 



 10 Replies

Adv k . mahesh (advocate)     05 April 2014

the whole life story you have elaborated 

1. after coming from their parents house do not disturb her for one day even if she wants to argue with you or your other family members be patient 

2. go for a long drive and then discuss with her about your future plans and also about you ongoing tension and ask her the same solution how to solve 

because she is nice only her family members making whole life miserable so plan accordingly and then decide what step is to be taken and then meet a local lawyer 

Azharuddin (Senior Software Enginner)     05 April 2014

Hello Mr Mahesh


Thanks for your advice. Since she is under high influence of her parents and uncles who are more like goons, discussions with her is not yeilding any results.

And as I conveyed, they have threatend me for life and I suspect they might file some wrong case on me, please advice me what should I do legally? Can I file FIR that I have received life threatening from her relatives?

I do not want to end this relation but from their side I feel they are ready to end this relation by torturing me. I work as an Engineer in a very big MNC and this job is my only source of income. So I do not want a bad remark on my career nor do I want to risk my job. Please advise

 

gautam (not disclosed)     05 April 2014

denying her phone can be constituted as a mental cruelty by the courts when the case reaches them.

secondly, she and her parents and relatives should be mature enough not to interfere in the marital life of the couple unless sought by the couple themselves, else the relation will break.

Take precautionary steps by engaging a good lawyer and at the same time visit some counsellors

don't take this lightly as your are still young and u should be sure that ur life will be smooth with ur wife.

Azharuddin (Senior Software Enginner)     06 April 2014

Thanks Gautam.. I accept your point but my wife has no problem in me denying her to use her personal phone. But we allow her to use my phone or my mom's phone to speak to her relatives.

So far her parents and relatives are in no mood to reconciliation for trivial issue between me and my wife.
I fear for my life from their life threats. They said either they will murder me or kill me through an accident. Someone please advise what can I do in this case. What does Indian law suggest in this? What case I have to file to protect my life against these threats ?

Azharuddin (Senior Software Enginner)     08 April 2014

Someone please advice

Azharuddin (Senior Software Enginner)     08 April 2014

Hello

Threats to my life havent stopped nor has my wife returned. I request advocates on this forum to suggest how to deal with this. Please help.

Sidharth (Officer)     10 April 2014

HiBrother, I underwent the exact same situation and delayed taking action thinking that she'll change her behaviour and mend her ways. After being at her parents for a long time, they served a notice for mutual divorce ( secretly demanding Rs 25,00,000 and a house) to let me free.. When I refused and sent notice for her to come back, They did not respond. Thus, I filed Section 9 RCR. However Without my knowledge they filed Section 125 CRPC for Maintenance before my case. Now it's very tough to prove that My case was genuine, And they are filing case after case (Now Filed Sec 13 for Divorce). So my advice is that take the first step and file Section 9 immediately, For either to call her back or to atleast give u a defence in case sh files fake cases to harass u later

Azharuddin (Senior Software Enginner)     12 April 2014

Hi Sidharth,, thanks for your time but section 9 is for Hindu act but my marriage is under Muslim advice.

Problem is now my is at her parents place for 10 days and now after her parents brainwash she now insists me to divorce her. And now even Im thinking to end this relation.

Someone please advise, if we go for mutual divorce according to muslim law i.e in presence of witnesses, Qazi, lawyers from both size. Now will my wife be still able to file me under fake cases like dowry, section 498, maintenance etc.

Vicky (Engg)     13 April 2014

Azharuddin, first of all you have got right to file RCR see below link for reference -

https://www.lawyersclubindia.com/forum/Rcr-can-be-filled-in-muslim-marriage-42238.asp#.U0mOkVVmO_E

 

now coming to your point just shouting by telling everyone that you are getting threatening calls doesn't prove anything, WHAT PROOF YOU GOT? Collect video or audio recordings and then file FIR.

 

as a muslim you have got right to have more than one wife, according to muslim law. don't worry about your first wife (i'm already saying) she has left, that' ok yaar chill.

 

if ANYONE from there family enter in your home or office, call police immediately file a case.

 

make her roam under COURTS till her hair becomes WHITE. You only need Good Lawyer.

ravi (Other)     14 April 2014

Seems this is a very wide spread problem.  Wife family interfering and brainwashing the girl.  Folks, please share your experience how you handled it from boys perspective.


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