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Kishore Malhotra (Govt Job)     03 October 2013

Please save me

I got married in year 2007 and having two kids.  I am a defence employee and mostly remain on the borders.  My wife is of a violent nature and always threaten us to arrest all my family on the basis of dowry and domestic violence.  As a result all my family members kept themselves away from me.  I am now posted in Jammu and bring her with me in family quarters.  Here also,  she ever prepare a ground for argument and result in quarrels. She always use unparliamentarily words for my mother  and my sisters also who have already married and living in their laws. Her brothers also kept her side and met my Commanding Officer with a complaint of assaulting her.  Fed up from her day to day threatening I had given her two three slaps few days back.  Now she become more violent and also bitten on my hand with her teeth.  She was also adulterous before marriage, which I came to after marriage, even then I ignored what had happened in past. But she never respect me or any member of my family. What should I do now, Please save me , otherwise I will do something wrong….

Please advice me :-

 

If I leave her to her parental home, is there any law that she can arrest my whole family on the basis of false allegation.

 

I have made my mind for taking divorce from her.  How should I initiate the case against her.



Learning

 10 Replies

Sarvesh Kumar Sharma Advocate (Advocacy)     03 October 2013

It's your life you are free to do every thing but first look the life of kids ; what mistake they done? Never take wrong path which is harm to you and your kids and your family!

Sarvesh Kumar Sharma Advocate (Advocacy)     03 October 2013

1. As you told that she can falsely allegate your family then if you can prove it false case itself not made out!

Sarvesh Kumar Sharma Advocate (Advocacy)     03 October 2013

2. Before filing divorce file an application before district legal services authority to rectify the problem!

Samir N (General Queries) (Business)     03 October 2013

Congratulations! She hit you, you hit her back! Thats good otherwise she would have continuously beaten you...

Now, do not be afraid of cases, etc. Let her file as many cases as she wants. Do NOT initiate divorce in a rush no matter how many STUPID advocates advise you to do so. Instead, plan and strategise and work towards it. If she has been beating you, keep documenting the beating. Go to a doctor for her bites, for example, and get a doctor's certificate. Somehow, try to have her leave you. Then try hard to get her back (I mean pretend to do so). Do not file RCR because she appears to be the type of person who would  join you. So, instead keep sending notices, like certified letters, asking her to come back... how much you love her, etc. Keep the drama going for two years and then BANG! File for divorce based upon desertion, mental cruelty, etc.  Of course, if she wants divorce too, then that would be the best option. But I doubt that is the case here.


If you file divorce now, you would be a fool. You will certainly not get it and worse, she will be very cautious of your tactics and make life hell for you. This is my first and last post in this thread. GOOD LUCK!



T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate (Advocate)     03 October 2013

Better take her to a counseling session with some prudent family counselors, see if she can be made alright or drop her at her parents' house for a while and let the gap be around six months upwards, you will find some changes, finally even after your best efforts she is not responding to your marital obligations as dutiful wife, you may seek the help of court accordingly.

A.VIVEK ADVOCATE (ADVOCATE)     03 October 2013

before done anything please mind your child 

 report the problems to your wife side gentleman 

  if you are not satisfied or your wife not corrected/changed  herself

 best go for  divorce   

Anand (CEO)     03 October 2013

Listen to @Vivek and @Kalasevan and if not work, @Samir. Go direct @Samir if @Vivek advice already tried.

Kishore Malhotra (Govt Job)     04 October 2013

Sir, we are equally woried about the kids, but wt can be done when she has no sense.

Kishore Malhotra (Govt Job)     04 October 2013

Sir thanks for your advice.....I am very much worried about my kids....that's why I kept her with me at my duty station....Last month I myself left her to her parental home and the kids were left with me.  She at her home made allegation that me and my family member, who staying away from me, snatched the children when she was leaving.  During her stay about a month, she never even given a phone call to know about her children.   Thereafter, her brother alongwith some other neighbours, reported to my commanding officer and left her with me.  They also threatn me to be ready to face the consequences. I accepted her..she became more violent after that...and threaten daily that she would put me and my family member in jail soon.   I am alone here......I could not even perform my duties perfectly due to this tension....Please advice me correctly....I can not tolerate anymore.....I want to get rid of this type of life partner...

Anand (CEO)     04 October 2013

U decide all over. so plan 4 divorce but with proofs of problems and wait til proof ready. Not go quick. 


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