i fail to understand how an 80+ lady is affecting ur life..
not just ur wife,ur mum also needs psychiatric help.at this age,they too long for peace and simple food.i think that somewhere down th line,u have not learnt to handle ur mum.so she has become overbearing.take her to a psychiatrist.if he diagnoses her to be having some illness,get her treated for it...
besides my above advice,i wonder why u dont live separately from ur mum if she is so bothersome?
even if this is ur self owned house,u let her live alone here,without naming this property in her name.so no one will snatch ur house even if u live separately.
if this is also not possible,construct a dividing wall so that she cannot access ur area.now please dont say that an 80+lady is so powerful,that she will break the dividing wall also to intrude into ur ife..
all said and dun,i feel u shd not abandon her completely.after all she gave u birth..she got u married.because of her upbringing only,u were able to work...if she had not brot u up well,u wud not had any confidence to work also.
u give her some money monthly for her sustenance,even though u may boycott her.
even if u take recourse to law,people there will wonder why u dint take any action against her,wen she had tried killing ur family....they may think u r cooking up stories about an elderly person to harass her...law may/may not book her as she is too old....
please think with a cool mind and solve ur problems urself.how will u feel if ur son and his wife treat ur psy. wife in the same manner in her old age,if by chance u die before her?will ur soul not cry seeing all this ill-treatment?
see,our problems which seem like a mountains have simple solutions which we never try to seek,because we are always charged wid emotions.
so act wisely and coolly,else u may have to repent later on if u do anything illegal,and all ur retired life will become more torturous than now...