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Swapnil Shirodkar (Process Control Engineer)     19 December 2011

Threat from inlaws and wife

Dear Concerned.,

I was just married two months back and now i am abroad as my work requires lot of travelling. After my departure my wife just stayed for 2 days at my house with my parents.. We have a one bedroom Flat and space is a major constraint. My wife wants that she needs the whole bedroom and no one should come there... It all started with the noise of utensil which broke her sleep early in the morning  and the Toilet. Now its taking shape of a full fleged war between two families.. her parents are constantly telling us either resolve the problem/you will see the extreame...

We have not asked for a single paise dowry in fact we bought everything like cupboard/and matress.. Now i fear that their family will file section 498A against me and my aging family who can barely walk.. How do we protect ourself


 15 Replies

kusum gupta (prop.)     19 December 2011

dear sir,

 before they file false complaints you better take steps for precautionary purpose otherwise when time goes you along with your family may not be able to escape arrest.


kusum gupta advocate


1 Like

Swapnil Shirodkar (Process Control Engineer)     19 December 2011

Thank you for ur reply....can u please suggest precautionary measures which we should undertake..... i have already started recording voice conversations....what more i need to do....

1 Like

ravindra (Analyst)     19 December 2011

phon recordings or voice recording.  etc

1 Like

kusum gupta (prop.)     19 December 2011

no these are not the precautionary measures. for taking precautionary measures you have to issue a legal notice to your wife and notice should be prepared in such a way so that it can act as pre defense for you lateron.

kusum gupta advocate

1 Like

Shantanu Wavhal (Worker)     19 December 2011

join SIFF.


may god save this country from Gender biased laws.

1 Like


Whole family in a single bedroom?How can she feel comfortable when your father is also in the bedroom?

Swapnil Shirodkar (Process Control Engineer)     19 December 2011

No... when i was and my wife was in one bedroom.... even when she stayed there... my parents gave her the whole bedroom... and my parents and my bro were sleeping in the living room .... she is not willing to adjust... moreover the cupboard is in the bedroom due to which my dad and Brother has to come to take their clothes.... but she does not like anyone coming in... 

@Ms Kusum.... well at the moment the situation has not reached that point to issue legal notice to my wife.... can u suggest anyother means.. by which we can give petetion to court without even their knowledge.... it just as a means of defence shield


ok.but you should manage to take the cupboard to livingroom or some other place of your flat.If it is not possible tell your mother to take cloths of your father and brother.She is new to your family and needs privacy.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     19 December 2011

Originally posted by :****utpala**
Whole family in a single bedroom?How can she feel comfortable when your father is also in the bedroom?

@ Utpala

1. G
eneration of DIL’s harmoniously lived and grew up becoming Public Servants and or Pilots and or S/w Engineers and or Researchers and or Teachers and or Doctors and or even Mafia Queens from their bare existence post marriage out of 1 bed room space (i.e. 1BHK
)!  That’s short and long life in METROS for millions of dead and alive DIL’s.

2. Before 2006 (i.e. pre DV Act days) all above DIL’s (wives to someone) never felt un-comfortable living in 1 BHK after their marriage till 2006 Diwali celebration nite when NCW gifted DIL’s their best “residence rights in one shot as Law on a clean silver plate as Diwali gift”.



3. When marriage takes place both families finds out / visit living condition of each others as one of the point to check for comfort for their daughter – status compatibility in a marriage – right? Was the authors wife’s side never knew 1 BHK status of groom and or when the groom went overseas to earn GREEN BUCKS they only then suddenly discovered 1 BHK is not suitable living wise for their ladali now their married daughter !


Same was the case of Delhi where presents day’s third generations grew up from Lajpat Nagar, Punjabi Bag, Naroji Nagar and Sriniwas Puri’s 1 BHK’s everywhere and today lots of them are in their retirement age (I mean I am talking of retiring DIL’s from Public services being clerks / stenos in some or the other Govt. Departments from Delhi here as comparative illustration of life in 1 BHK) Even today in and around these localities of Delhi you will still find haphazard mushrooming 1 BHK only and it is post 2006 the maximum DV cases in Delhi are also from these localities. You can check yourself authenticity of my say by self filing RTI Application and what is the main complaint in them –
residence rights protection order for this third neo-generation DIL. Now think in 1 BHK where this DIL will partition the property into and where In-Laws will commit suicide with their third generation tiny – tots i.e. third – forth generation kidoos from joint extended families of theirs!

@ Utpala, why do you say today i.e. post 2006 era 'wife feels un-comfortable seeing Father In Laws picking cloths in bedroom' when that is the only sustenance option of living out of a 1BHK flat for the entire family i sthere + were most wives married before 2006 blind not to realize life in METROS or were they straight away transported from some or the other villages not to know what 1 BHK living is all about in double digit inflation and high interest rates regime means?

I mean here if wife needs exclusive privacy in 1BHK all for herself for that she should have asked her parents to gift her 1+ BHK all for herself to live comfortably the day husband left overseas instead of threatening groom / in laws to fix the issue now that he is in a overseas country earning for a better living / may be saving for future per se dreaming for purchasing larger flat space once he returns – a Santro / Honda – or a bungalow at Juhu Tara Road – every half yearly holidays to wife to Singapore to play rummi there etc. etc.  

Let us check what is the status in terms of space ownership back home of this wife first? Does her father own 6 BHK penthouse to complain today of 1 BHK which his daughter is married into after all due diligences done by him which normally majority of middle class families do before marriage – right or wrong?



The problem here is that of overnight becoming rich and nothing else more so of a third generation wife as she is the one complaining here and for raising complaint knowing about her pre-marriage living condition status is important and if her father had same status standing as 1 BHK then she should not now complain and if her father did not have same status then why the marriage took place afterall and no one in her family knew before her marriage how much problem she is going to face for the one and only bed room in a 1BHK!!!


It will not be wonder if her demands are not fulfilled on press of a ISD Tel. call to her husband the father in law will be behind bars on rape charges that is end of all generations rise and fall living out of a 1 BHK yet we hardly hear media news of FIL raping DIL from Mumbai’s 72% chawls and or 1 BHK skyscrapers is it not surprising for feminist that for DV Act was made and now Maharashtra Assembly is debating to pass
“50% residence / property rights to DIL Bill, 2010” this Assembly season courtesy lobbying by Mazlis and Lawyers Collective and you feminists groups ………………..



Are you aware that in Mumbai several trial Court ADJ’s / Magistrates still live in 1 BHK with their DIL’s ! Even 1 ASJ of Delhi still lives in 1 BHK with his DIL so are 4 ADJ’s in Delhi living out of 1 BHK with DIL’s is stats. As per last count.



It feels sad to know you are quite away from realities of urban living in today’s times in the name of giving privacy to DIL’s and mind it lots of these fathers of similar kind of author’s too have grown up daughters where family’s cupboard are in their daughter’s room and till date no daughter raised such complaints as if for her there  never are any privacy issues – then why divide the same gender now with a flick of status change (daughter then - now a DIL) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

2 Like

Swapnil Shirodkar (Process Control Engineer)     19 December 2011



I really appreciate your comments and for your understanding. First of all the Girls father was a bigshot and she and her mother were thrown out when the girl was a few months old as the father dint want  a girl child. She lived in a 2 bedroom flat and one room is put for lease for PGs. The girls Family did come to our house to see the i bedroom flat and they just stopped short of saying a NO and anticipated that the girl will adjust. Now the girl is finding it difficult to adjust and i am under severe pressure... They are threating to make my familis life miserable by using their high level contacts and out us behind bars. one of their relatives is a Major Genral in the army... i fear for my mamma and dad... Please suggest me some measure!!!!!!!! ... PLease..... I am in dire straits... I hope me and my family wont end up finishing our Lives

kusum gupta (prop.)     20 December 2011

yes you can submit in court but mind it lateron there will be a summon to your wife and others to whommever you make parties.however this may act as some defense in case lateron she implement her threat on you and your family


kusum gupta

Swapnil Shirodkar (Process Control Engineer)     20 December 2011

But we want to do it just to protect.... and without having the court to Summon my IL's .. Its just a Notificatio.... till now he situation has not gone to that extent 


I dont know whether it is possible,


You can make a complaint in the local PS..NOT AND FIR..that you are being threatened by your inlaws..they are threatening that they will file 498A, 406 etc etc..and we are living in great fear..


If you do case they file a complaint later..police will not take things will always be at an advantage..


You can also mention that the reason is a 1BHK flat..and noting else..and she is not able to adjust in the 1BHK falt..and ask the PS to put a seal and keep an original copy with you...


You wife and her inlaws will not even know about this...


If someting goes wrong in can use the same immediately to get Anticipatory bail..


Experts please advise.



Prabhu ( )     20 December 2011

Hi Experts,

     In my case I applied for AB with the details of the issues we faced and mentioned the threat from in-laws.

     AB closed as there is no FIR, does this helps me if they file any case and court consider that i already faced threat from in-laws.




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