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sita (Software engineer)     07 October 2011

Please help me get out of my problem with marriage

I am married for 3 years ,under unusual circustances, my husband told me that he would die if i dont marry him , as we were friends by common friends and donot want some one dying because me and believing his words of love , i have convinced my parents and got married , my husband is a jain and i am an hindu.Though i didnot want to get married because of his words of death i had married him , from the day of the marriage there is no love , he has left his job, and mortgaged all my jewels of worth of 20 laks and took all my savings from my job, infact he kept my bank debit card with him , i was just like a money machine , even after all this , i just asked for some care and love, he never cares for me, situation is such that even if i touch him in sleep , he will wake me up and shout at me , i was scared even to sleep.some how i have taken courage and changed my job to mumbai, i am here for the last 9 months . 


Our marriage took as per jain customs , and we have not registered the marriage , Now i am planning to go to Australia permanently on job , and i wish restart my life.


Please let me know if i can go away and start my life if i find a good person to share my life without taking divorce in india . my marriage took place in bangalore , i came to know that marriage registration is compulsary in karnataka , please let me know if my marriage can be called invalid as we did not register it , 2. can this marriage be annuled .please guide me on this  and how to come over this problem.

Can my marriage be called void as marriage registration is made compulsory as per karnataka high court,my marriage is not registered until now though the marriage is performed formally as per jain marriage.can i assume that marriage is void, in such a case i don need to go for the painful procedure of divorce , please Help


 21 Replies

Sanjeev (Lawyer)     08 October 2011

Non registration of marriage dont make it void. In case you have decided to stay away from him ask him to agree for a mutual consent divorce or if he dont agrees than you will have to file a divorce petition but the second option is time consuming.

It would not be appropriate to start a new life (means marrying again in Australia) without seeking divorce in India.

sita (Software engineer)     08 October 2011

He is not ready to give divorce mutually.more over i am preasurised by his emaill,sms and phone calls . 



adv. rajeev ( rajoo ) (practicing advocate)     08 October 2011

In fact you have no grounds to go for divorce. He is not readey for consent divorce. Just you do one thing you try to convince her once again, if there is any change it is well and good, if there is no change in him then you decide to go abroad. Dont think about anything.




Since you were married as per Jain custom - Hindu marriage act will apply. As per Hindu Marriage act - status of wife and husband is same - there is nothing like your income or his income - irrespective of who is earning -  other party has a right in that through maintenance - so forget your thought  that  you were used as money machine -- if society accepts this interpretation -- 90% women will fall in that bucket.

As some of the  advocate friends has advised above - their are certain grounds of divorce - including mutual consent, cruelty, adultery etc.  Please see which of the ground you get get divorce on

Nadeem Qureshi (Advocate/     08 October 2011

Dear Sita

If you think that you can not live with him and you willing to restart your life with someone then dont waste time and file a divorce petition under Hindu Marriage Act and if he is agree then you can file a Mutual Consant divorce.

feel free to call me on 9953809956 or write me on

sita (Software engineer)     08 October 2011

Is it like a woman has no right to live peacefully, i am dying everyday from the torcher of his sms and calls, if the law doesnt have any grounds for me to be free , then its waste of living in search of a better and peaceful, life . some men only marry and destroy womens life for the money, women can only go  down to death in my circumstances .

I have told spoke to him about my problem , many a times , he just say go with someone,is this marriage all about , first of all why shud i goo thru all this painful period because of a mans attitude , if i have not taken the consent of the law or the courts ,then why shud i take consent of the court to get apart , why cant the divorce laws easy, leave it on the people whos taking pain. Current laws of divorce only making a womens go thru pain and agony of time.


adv. rajeev ( rajoo )

With due respect sir , if i have no grounds for divorce , women like are left to die like this .if our laws are like this , then i believe i shud not bother about all these , i have not taken permission to marry , in that case why shud i take permission of  the court.i will move away to Australia and will my life in peace .


Thanks for all the advice.........hope indian laws will change for better ....

Aishwarya (Teacher)     08 October 2011

Dont be depressed , collect all ur confidence and regain ur spirit to live..if there be any chance then do try to give it a second thought as there is no major problem as far as ive read ur story..

If not then u can take the help of elders of his family and ur family for settling the issues peacefully

Anjuru Chandra Sekhar (Advocate )     08 October 2011

Don't be depressed.  In India law does not show solutions to people but lawyers will.  If you discuss in this forum you would not get the right solution.  Directly approach any good lawyer in "family laws" he will show you easy solution.





It anobody, feminists are responsible for your plight. Ask them to advocate  no fault divorce. Write to women and child welfare misnistry.


babu (Supervisor)     08 October 2011

hi dont feel god is great

sita is really old school... nowadays we hear cases of 498a dowry harassment and dv cases... pull up your sox... all his rat race will be behind bars if he is guilty... dont do any adultery which will work against you... you can collect back each penny of yours...

sita (Software engineer)     08 October 2011

I am not worried about money , i just need freedom , freedom to live for myself.

SSng Aulakh (Senior Ship Master)     09 October 2011

You keep collecting /preserving evidences,  SMS and e-mails exchanged. Truth will always prevail. Do not worry. Advise and intervention of elders will  take you out of  this mess.

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