Criminal Trident Pack: IPC, CrPC and IEA by Sr. Adv. G.S Shukla and Adv. Raghav Arora
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priti (nothing)     14 May 2013

Nri husband fled away and parents also hiding somewhere

my name is priti.i married to my husband in 2011.since marriage he and his parents used to torture me for dowry but it was my foolishness that i kept my mouth shut.i was living in hope that everything will be settled.He went abroad just after a month and i lived with his parents.his parents kept all types of boundation on me although i m a very shy type, i was not too frndly with every1.then after an year i joined him abroad.after a month only he started torturing me mentally and physically alongwith his brother.he used to threaten me and insult me in front of his friends.finally i got preganant and just after a month he beated me.then i complained his mother and instead of saying anything to her son she created a lot of misunderstandings between us and finally after 10 days we reached india.he said he will cum n take me on a particular date as our tickets were booked but he didnt cum n i got to know he went back without even informing me.finally we lodged complaints against him n his family.FIR is already lodged in february.warrant has been issued but his parents fled away and hiding somewhere in India.its 2 mnths since they had fled away leaving their house.my case cant move further as no appearance from their side in the court.notices are being issued on every date.wat to do.pls help.



Learning

 19 Replies

priti (nothing)     14 May 2013

even these days women used to file false cases against husbands.specially NRI to get money.but in my case its not false.i never demanded for any money and after marriage i was forced to earn by doing a job and till date all money is snatched away by my husband threatening me.i have the proofs of that i never demanded any money from them.

Adv Archana Deshmukh (Practicing Advocate)     14 May 2013

But at least some of their relatives may be knowing where they are.... try to find out a amicable way to resolve the matter out of court if possible.

Legally, if warrants are issued against the accused and if the accused is absconding then, suggest your lawyer for proclamation and attachment of property of the accused as provided in the Cr PC ( but these things will further strain ur relationship with ur inlaws & hubby, so first of all look into all other possibilities for possible reconciliation if you want, before taking any harsh step).

priti (nothing)     14 May 2013

thank u ma'am, as u know relatives of boys side will take their side and girls side will take my side. i m pregnant and being a mother i never wanted my baby to suffer without his father as every1 knows a child needs both mother & father.the situations are worsened thats why i took these actions.no relative will tell the truth.how can i get him back to india.i want him to face me and answer my questions.

priti (nothing)     14 May 2013

if his relatives also know then they will not tell us.they will save them.i tried a lot to solve it on personal level but all in vain.yes warrants are issued but my lawyer is saying we cant get the copy as it is not a very big crime.i want him to get back to India.how to find his parents out?

Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Advocate)     14 May 2013

I agree with Ms Archana. Just like you many  girls are greedy of NRI hubby and ruining their life in streotyped repeated story.

 

If thier relatives know there whereabounts and they do not tell then police knows how to get details from them.

priti (nothing)     15 May 2013

mr.sudhir, when u dont know the reality dont say anything.if i m greedy then i must b having a lot of money with me, but whatever i earned after marriage he took away from me and i have the proofs of it.he dont have that much self respect even that i should atleast give her money back.i dont have a single penny in my account neither his nor mine.can u imagine how m i managing with the baby in my womb? no u cant bcoz u r a man.anyways thank u.

warrior (Personal)     15 May 2013

Dear Priti,

I am pretty sure You and your husband has 100s of misunderstandings, but have you tried to solve anyone of them amicabilly (let me stress you on this...without arguing or shouting????) ask your self?

You have mentioned that Husband took all your money and you are presenting this as a crime but 99% of indian families are traditional families where Husband and wife earn and Husband manages accounts or wife manages accounts which is normal(don't listen to your relatives, they help you now and laugh at you at your back).

You have mentioned you went to abroad if your husband called you to abroad that means  you could have resigned your Job in India and went to abroad to live with him. am I correct?

Home work : Writdown all the accusations you are making and write down all the efforst you and your family have put in to restore the marriage on a paper(s) without showing partiality. read the same written papers and remove all false accusations you have written and then read the true accusations( you and entir world know that accusations written in 498a case FIR are false). then ask yourself what you want ?

1) Get rid of the husband and his family and continue like this with Kid.

2) Restore and save this marriage.

OPTION 2: If you want to restore the marriage then filing 498A, DV, Mc 125 ...etc does not get your husband back. they will distroy your existing family and never do justice. Cases are for threattenning husband and his family but they does not restore family.

You have mentioned that your baby needs mother and father, if you said this from bottom of your heart you will not approach POLICE or courts.....understand this Police need money from you and your husband ...they don't care if your family get spoiled. Its you and Your parents should have thought of this before approaching police.

You have a desire to bring your husband back from abroad this is just to take revange on him, if I am not wrong that is not possible. Stop evil thinking because of someone's advice/misguidance and save your marriage.

You have not mentioned howmuch dowry your husband is demanding ? are you from a rich family , why is your husband demanding money if you don't have money ?

You have not mentioned that you LOVE love your husband, do you Love your husband??

I am not criticizing you but I want to save your family, don't save your marriage because you are going to have a kid but if you Love your husband then save your arriage. let me repeate COURT CASES DO NOT SAVE MARRIAGE THEY DISTROY MARRIAGE.

rest all your decission....

-Warrior

warrior (Personal)     15 May 2013

priti (nothing)     16 May 2013

sir if misunderstandings are there, u r right we should talk n solve but what if he changes his number.it means he isnt ready to tok.jab aap kisi ki baato me aa jaye it means apka pyar vishwas se zada bada galatfahmi ka rishta hai apke beech.aise rishte se kya milega?if i wud have not loved him and if i wud have any greed of money, i wud have aborted this child and taken money from my husband and after divorce i wud have married to sum rich man again.but i didnt do anything.i m still carrying the baby in my womb with a hope may b he will cum back.they r demanding for a car and 5lakhs.may b he is not that greedy but his mother is for sure.and i know its all happened bcoz of his mother.from day 1 he cleared me tht for him his mother cums first then father then brother and at last me.i m not saying ki i need to b the first.yaha pe koi race nahi ho rahi.but as he belives and loves his mother blindly he should have sum responsibility 2wards me and his cuming child.but he dont have that.if wud have loved me for a single second he wud have never abandoned me in india.jitni bhi misunderstandings hai mai bolti rah gayo i have not done or said it he said u r lying my mother told me all this.then going from india he called up my colleagues there(abroad) and said if embassy calls u tell them that girl was characterless, not gud, blah blah.if he wud have asked for money it wont b a crime but threatening and taking money is very different,and he did that.he always insulted me in front of his friends.kamre se tak bahar nikali gayi hu mai inke frnds k samne.dhakke deke.we r not very rich but by Gods grace my brother is earning gud by his job.i resigned just b4 a mnth of my marriage.then while he was abroad i was forced to work in his hometwn wherei stayed with his parents.i did everything just lyk a maid and with the job, still his mother was not happy.i want to restore my marriage as i dont want my child to b without a father otherwise i will give it to my sister.I have suffered a lot and i cannot face my childs biggest Question where is my father?wen i was left abandoned without a single penny with only the tortures of him & his family.unable to reach him with the baby in my womb, i was having no option left of taking help from police.and after leaving me in India his parents approached to everyone spreading the rumour that girl is characterless.how can i keep an affair in India sitting abroad without having a single minute even to spend on me, how wud me or sum1 can manage an affair.and my question is after police complaints court notices atleast u shud tok to me, but no.they always said we are ladkawalas and u being a girl and ladkiwala side should always bow on our feet.now tell me if i m agirl i need to bow, my family need to bow.jis desh me hum rahte hai wo bhi bharat MATA hai.jin deviyo ko hum pujtey hai wo bhi aurat hai.my allegations in FIR is not at all wrong sir.he left me he beated me he snatched everything my phone my belongings jewellary salary.he insulted me tortured me, why? do u marry a girl to torture her use her & throw her?pls answer me.

warrior (Personal)     16 May 2013

Dear Priti,


I can totally understanding your situation.

Could you please tell me few good things about your husband since the marriage till date. Tell me like when you are not fighting what he used to tell you ? Ex : he likes you or he loves you ...or he takes you to Cinima or a resturent...something like that.

He buys you icecream because you like it or he purchases nice dress because you like them etc....

I asked you to write few things about your husband on a paper which you didn't do coz you thought you are matured enough and you don't need silly home work. let me request you again to do that before you reply again.

Let me give you an illustration how we human think: Last week I had travelled from place X to Place Y which took 9 hours in a car and I was tired after driving 9 hours, after reaching the destination I was asked how was the journey and told them it was 'OK' but I had encountered atlease 4 "speed breakers" out of which 1 was very big one etc....I hate speed breakers...

So, the other person started assuming that the journey was unplesent and I could have been tired and so he made arrangements for me to take sound rest.

If you notice I have told my friend "truth" but at the sametime I misguided him, let me tell you how...!!!

I had travelled 9 hours in a smooth highway without any bunps but I had to slow down my car 4 times where I had seen speed breakers. When my friend asked me how was the journey I remembered only 4 speed breakers but not the smooth highway with attractive trees and greenaries around and wonderaful farms beside to the road. We human think the way our minds drive us.

I am not arguing with you nor asking you to do what you don't like, I want you to think what you have been telling others (parents and brother...etc) is appropriate. You may be telling the truth but is that the only truth existed between you and your husband?

When you are telling about 4 speed breakers to your father you also have to examin yourself make sure you are telling about 9 hours of awesome journey as well?

Reality : if your husband is abroad why  does he need 5 lakhs ...which could be peanuts for him. or why does he need a car in abroad ???

Conclusion : You are new to courts and police station. I'v seen many people who lost wives and husbands because of this police/courts.

       Act of revange is out of anger but it does not solve the problem. Even if you make your husband get arrested and send him to Jail you can't have sweet husband back and a loving father to your kid.

      Hasty decissions are not going to fetch peaceful life, you are spoiling your life and your Kid's life and also your parents peace for up coming 7 years( which is the normal 498A settelling period).

Observation : You seem to be aggrassive and tit for tat girl, please calm down and think coolly. I know you have loads of LOVE inside you, please poure out that on your husband and see what he will do in return.

 

God Bless You.

    

 

 

 

 

priti (nothing)     16 May 2013

respected sir, i dont know u r a lawyer or not? firstly i am not aggressive neither i m tit for tat type, if i wud have been that, i wud have committed suicide to take revenge from him bcoz in that case he is surely to b in jail.but i dont want to give any punishment to my child who is not even aware wat is happening in this outside world.i m not wanting him to b in india for getting arrested or take any revnge.i m a very simple and homely type grl.i just want him to cum to india,face me,look into my eyes and just answer a few questions to me.thats all.no money no revenge nothing.after answering my question he will ask me to get out of his life i will do that without even asking him any further question.if he will ask for divorce i will do that also for him.as u know abroad its only english movies and i dont lyk any of them, he do take me forcefully without even knowing my choice.restraunts ofcourse yes bcoz of eating nonveg as nonveg is not allowed to cook at home.restraunts food everything of his choice.yes dresses too but all of his choice.if ever i asked that i want this or that,he said ok but never got it.after few days wen he feels that he should get it for me he does.but never of my choice.2yrs of marriage he never asked me to cum n sit with him n spend sum gud moments with me.never.and me always cooking my best reading over the internet new recepis for him so that i can make him happy.getting new clothes for him,thinking may b he lyk it.getting gifts for him on special occassions to make him feel happy.as u asked me to write sum gud things about him but those 2yrs i never felt anything which really made me feel happy.i dont even remember that wen did he say i love u for the last tym.jab ek ladki ki shadi hoti hai wo apne partner k liye bhot sapne dekhti hai even parents of the girl want her to b happy with her husband, aur jab wo sapne toot jate hai poori duniya khatam ho jati hai sir.he took 4 lakhs from me and bought a shop for hisfather on his name.why? why did he snatch the money from me and by now he is well known that i have to bear my child alone all expenses,shouldnt he responsible to transfer that amount to me so that i can bear my child's expenses and have my delivery.is my parents responsible for the birth of this child.i already poured loads of love to him and his family and have seen wat i got in return.ek ladki jiski shadi khatam ho jati hai wo har din mar mar k jiti hai lyk me.i nver stopped crying for a single day.thanx.

warrior (Personal)     16 May 2013

Dear Priti,

 

I am sorry for what you are going through. All I we can do in this forum is to guide you to right direction to restore your marriage. Please understand one thing clearly COURTS does not restore your family but they break marriage evenmore.

I have given examples of "Movie/Resturents/few loving words" thats an example and you can make up many such events. I like that you are still answering to me whom you don't even know. So, here is a truth of life : every incidend between wife and husband has 3 dimensions 1) Wife version of story which she tells according to her understanding and experience 2) Husband version of story which he tells according to his understanding and experienc. 3) this is most important of all "TRUTH" truth of the incident.

Please read the example I have given you in my previous reply about 9 hours travel and understand that we humans understand what we want from a sitution but we dont want to understand what we dont pay attention in a situation, we are human beings and this is what we do.

Regarding the questions what you want to ask I would say this is a bate you are throwing to attract your husband to come to you, how do you really expect him to come to you is he fool ?

You have filed a criminal case against husband and there is a warrant issued on him and he and his family running away from house because of police arrest fear and you want him to come to you for answering your questions? Please think practically.....one thing I like in you though you are still open for a dialog... wait for your husband to get back to you and think about criminal cases you have put on him...

cases does not solve problems but ruin your life, our ego can be controlled and we can make our lives happy married life. Don't put your lives into court's hands.

I see your problem is just beginning in courts, once you get into courts you can't stop it.

Vengeance does not cure your issue neither courts, only Love and affection can. Decide what you want.

God Bless You.

 

 

v.n.muralidharan (tax consultant)     19 May 2013

The first thing you should do is to avoid discussing such intimate personal problems in a public forum like this.It is not going to help you in any way.If you want a reconciliation take the help of sympathetic relatives or friends. If a want a legal solution go to a good lawyer.Pl avoid discussions in public forums.I am giving this advice as a senior citizen in his seventies and also as a legal expert.

V N MURALIDHARAN

Reformist !!! (Other)     21 May 2013

I am skeptical about this query posted. At one place she is saying that her husband is not the one who demanded money and husbands mother is the one who is instigating.

I have a question here, when u both were living abroad, then there is no question of boys mother asking for money or car ??? You should not have lodged FIR against ur husband, if he is not at fault. 

C the relations are based only on trust. As u said, u tried reconciliation between u too before u went to police. Thats good, but all relations are based on trust and which is once broken cant be made OK afterwards. I see this could be the reason why reconciliation failed. I am not blaming you or him. I am just sayin that you said he did not demanded anything then u shud not have roped him in FIR......and shud have tried talking to him. In real world, u must be aware of the fact that in ur house also finances are headed by the male member of the family. Thats actually ur perception that he took away ur money, ur salary but as per him he was heading the expenses/finances of the house. Yes, u shud not be denied for ur Istridhan but managing home is part of ur job and finances is part of his job. All depends how u perceives the things actually.

Anyways, i wud still urge to settle the matter amicably. There is no law who can bring him back to India. Its better if u ask them to come around the table and settle ur differences , either part ur ways or live together. But i can see he will not take u back after this FIR and he must be looking for parting his ways.

 

 


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