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(Guest)

Divorce within 3 months of Marriage

Iam Mahesh Naik Working in  L&T.

I got married on 14 July,2010 and now my family and my wife's family having some dispute. The reason for dispute is my bride was characterless ( she was having affair). So now i want divorce from here.
1)Shall i take divorce from her because now we were completed only 3.5 months of marriage life.
2)We were not having any physical relationship till today.
3) She was in our home only for 10 days after marriage. Now she is living in her father's house.
4) Their father is filed a case against our family ( Dowry case).
100% i want divorce from her. please can you guide or give me suggestion, bcz we are not completing our 1 year of marriage life
 
personal mail id ; maheshanaik@gmail.com
 
Mahesh Naik
SAP Practice
 L&TInfotech | Mumbai, India | Office +91(22) 6640 2495


Learning

 35 Replies

Roshni B.. (For justice and dignity)     03 November 2010

u said her pre marital affair is the main cause of problem...and for that u gave her a big name,ie,characterless.

tell v.honestly that u never had any affair/fling all ur life b4 marriage....

now tell us if she's having the affair after marriage also.if yes,u can get a divorce.if no,u cant get a divorce based on her past life.rather u will be thot of as cruel by the judges if she files a case against u that u call her such names becoz of her past which no more exisis .

u said there's no physical relationship.is it because u hate her as she had an affair?

if the affair is not there post marriage,please act wisely & start living like a married couple.if there's any medical problem in any of u,better meet a s*xologist/counsellor instead of wasting ur time,energy,money in litigation.he'll treat u in a few months in a reasonable fee.you shud focus on problem solving,not on the problem..

also,its v.common nowadays that unmarried people have affairs,flings etc.if the partner is gud after marriage these things dont matter.how are u sure that if u marry another gal,she'll be a pure virgin gal?either u marry an uneducated villager..but in her case also,no guarantee.

 

u said she lives wid her dad now.i guess u sent her bak as she had an affair.again if the affair is no more there,please call her bak after apologies...else u will be charged with throwing her out of marital home.

 

dowry case already filed ...and ur marriage is so new...please ask yourself if u and your family are not guilty of dowry demands...if yes....plz correct yourself else u will be in deep trouble...if it's a false case...either fight it out,or reconcile or mutual...but think of all the suggestions i gave u earlier in all the above paragraphs...its for your own good...

there's a saying "act in haste,repent in leisure".........apply this in your life if you are wrong.

good luck!

2 Like

(Guest)

I donot want her...i need divorce.... or else i will go out of home....

CommonMann (Software Professional)     03 November 2010

@Mahesh

Roshni B is very much correct. But am in the opinion regarding 498a(dowry) case is false. Since now adyas this is very common tool to extort money. Anyways divorce is very tough to get or seems to be impossible in your case, until its mutual. My best suggestion is take some mediator and settle the case. As from ur profile it seems ur are software professional. Dont waste ur time in indian judiciary. Indian Judiciary is a way of earning bread and butter for some mean lawyers and judges. I sent you a friend request thru gtalk. You can add me. WILL DISUCSS ON THAT.

Cheers

Roshni B.. (For justice and dignity)     03 November 2010

@ charanpreet

Thanks

i wud like to add that even if there's no dowry harassment,498A case can still be filed by her as she's already being subjected to cruelty(asked to leave marital home,being called characaterless,deprived of s*x, etc)

 498A is popularly called dowry case.but it can also be filed if there are other forms of cruelty

@mahesh

ok leave.......and get charged with desertion also.

 

Roshni B.. (For justice and dignity)     03 November 2010

@ mahesh

i read your PM to me just now...u alleged that I'm acting too smart with you which i shud not do.

well..my intention was to help you out...and in return i get branded as "oversmart"

if this is how u respond to helpful people,i can undersatnd wot your wife must be going thru..rather she shud ask for divorce and get married to an adult male.right now she's with a kid

my final words to you: .u will get many advisers,but u suffer alone!

good luck!

Anonymous1 (fjslfj;)     03 November 2010

@ Roshni,

 
To be honest, i didnt like the tone and message that you have provided too!!! Pls understand "flirting/talking" to girls/guyz is entirely different from having an "affair". Having an "affair" and hiding that from other person is a clear reflection of a person's charecter. If the "affair" doesnt have any negative intentions, then why in the world should you hide it?? If a husband and openly says, after marriage,  that he had an affair with another girl wouldnt you sympathise for the girl..be honest..

 

Also, Mahesh has just mentioned that his wife stayed with him only for 10 days and she is now with her father. But you have alreday made multiple assumptions..... that he has sent her back to her father's place......that there are medical problems and adivising him to approach a s*xologist who will treat him in few months....asking him if he and his parents are guilty of dowry demands... You have also mentioned that divorece case is field...Why are u making such unwated assumptions???

 

Worst part, are your statements "its v.common nowadays that unmarried people have affairs,flings etc.if the partner is gud after marriage these things dont matter.how are u sure that if u marry another gal,she'll be a pure virgin gal?either u marry an uneducated villager..but in her case also,no guarantee"..... by these statements are you acknowledging that girls cannot be believed?? i take an hypothetical example ..will you agree to marry a  person who had relationship with multiple girls before marriage and just says that he wouldnt continue that relatsionship after marriage??...remember..marriage doesnt necessarily change one's character..way of life etc...when women ask for husband's to be Rama then they should first be like Sita...

 

If people ask for advise, just give advise..dont include your imaginations, assumptions etc etc into it..

Anonymous1 (fjslfj;)     03 November 2010

@ Roshni,

 
To be honest, i didnt like the tone and message that you have provided too!!! Pls understand "flirting/talking" to girls/guyz is entirely different from having an "affair". Having an "affair" and hiding that from other person is a clear reflection of a person's charecter. If the "affair" doesnt have any negative intentions, then why in the world should you hide it?? If a husband and openly says, after marriage,  that he had an affair with another girl wouldnt you sympathise for the girl..be honest..

 

Also, Mahesh has just mentioned that his wife stayed with him only for 10 days and she is now with her father. But you have alreday made multiple assumptions..... that he has sent her back to her father's place......that there are medical problems and adivising him to approach a s*xologist who will treat him in few months....asking him if he and his parents are guilty of dowry demands... Y...Why are u making such unwated assumptions???

 

Worst part, are your statements "its v.common nowadays that unmarried people have affairs,flings etc.if the partner is gud after marriage these things dont matter.how are u sure that if u marry another gal,she'll be a pure virgin gal?either u marry an uneducated villager..but in her case also,no guarantee"..... by these statements are you acknowledging that girls cannot be believed?? i take an hypothetical example ..will you agree to marry a  person who had relationship with multiple girls before marriage and just says that he wouldnt continue that relatsionship after marriage??...remember..marriage doesnt necessarily change one's character..way of life etc...when women ask for husband's to be Rama then they should first be like Sita...

 

If people ask for advise, just give advise..dont include your imaginations, assumptions etc etc into it..
 

Ranadip Garai (Student)     03 November 2010

According to the general rule you can not file petition for divorce before the one year of your marriage .But in case of exceptional hardship you may file petition for divorce with reasonable causes.IF you can satisfy hon'ble court that you are facing exceptional hardship then your petition  may be grant.

498aFighter (Analyst)     03 November 2010

Hi Mahesh,

 

Instead I will advise you for application for anullment for marriage on ground of 'Concealment of Fact(hiding fact which might have stopped the marriage if told before marriage)'.

 

But in this case you have to prove that she lied to you befor marriage and hidden her affair, which might be difficult. So you have to be smart and collect proof of that. You can talk to her over phone and made her confess (any how, emotional black mail, cry or what ever)that she hide her affair befor marriage.

 

It also had one advantage over divorce- you don't have to pay amy maintenance or alomony as in case of divorce if you will anullment.

 

Thanks!!

Roshni B.. (For justice and dignity)     03 November 2010

@ anonymous

Having an "affair" and hiding that from other person is a clear reflection of a person's charecter.

i clearly said that if the affair was after marriage,he can apply for a divorce.so how do u feel i am biased towards him?.if it's b4 marriage,i advised him that this is common nowadays.if unmarried people start telling their prospective partners abt. their affairs they shall never get married...i dont know wot bugged u both so much...

 

If a husband and openly says, after marriage,  that he had an affair with another girl wouldnt you sympathise for the girl..be honest..

the question of sympathy for a married man/woman arises only when his spouse's affair is continuing post marriage.

 

Also, Mahesh has just mentioned that his wife stayed with him only for 10 days and she is now with her father. But you have alreday made multiple assumptions..... that he has sent her back to her father's place.


this is wot any1 wud infer after reading his story,because he said that the cause of dispute is her past affair.i dont understand why u r overreacting to my statement.

 

kindly read my statements and tell me wherever i said "HE HAS MEDICAL PROBLEMS FOR WHICH HE SHUD SHOW HIMSELF TO A SEXOLOGIST.he had said that both of them have no phy. relations.so i advised both of them to meet a s*xologist together and if ANYONE of them has a problem he can take treatment..s*xolgists give marital counselling also even when there's no medical problem.i hope u know this.but u reacted without reading properly what i wrote.

 

.asking him if he and his parents are guilty of dowry demands... Y...Why are u making such unwated assumptions???

i am not assuming.just cautioning for his own good...becoz he said she filed dowry case.so i asked him if he's sure before plunging into litigation.


Worst part, are your statements "its v.common nowadays that unmarried people have affairs,flings etc.if the partner is gud after marriage these things dont matter.how are u sure that if u marry another gal,she'll be a pure virgin gal?either u marry an uneducated villager..but in her case also,no guarantee".....

 

okay do u want me to say that nowadays all unmarried men and women are bramachaaris and celibates?fine.... i shall speak a lie if it pleases u who lives in a fantasy world.please check the stats urself to know how common premarital s*x is,even in women...and only a psychic/enlightened person can read a person's face b4 marriage to knw. if he's virgin or not...

 

i take an hypothetical example ..will you agree to marry a  person who had relationship with multiple girls before marriage and just says that he wouldnt continue that relatsionship after marriage??...remember..marriage doesnt necessarily change one's character..way of life etc...when women ask for husband's to be Rama then they should first be like Sita...

 

the author said his wife had AN AFFAIR, ie, 1 AFFAIR before marriage...if he had said she had MULTIPLE AFFAIRS,i wud not have advised him so much...i dont knw where u read the word "multiple" in his query...

finally 1 suggestion to you anonymous jee:

please use reading glasses before fighting with any1 as u read wrongly everyth...if you use them already,kindly get an eyecheckup done

 

PS: it s v.irritating that certain members who seem to have personal grudges due to differing viewpoints overreact without reading and understanding wot i am saying.and this is how they come in forums to fight to take out their hatred.i am not bothered if they like my views or not,and i will never bother also...but i cant go on justifying everything...which i may not do each time for every silly reply henceforth.

for example:  the other day,when there was a discussion in a thread that parents luk for well off and physically able boys for their daughters which is only natural on their part,i got such replies(that seemed like lectures)in which the content of the write up suggested that the writers  think i have grudges against children who study in govt. schools,against handicapped people as prospective grooms,and against poor men also as prospective grooms.whereas i was just discussing the minset of parents in arranged marriages.i did not reply to these posts as i cant go on convincing a person if he's judgemental about me and has a fixed mindset  about my nature.....so i ignored it although it pissed me off.

2 Like

hedevil hydraheaded (non professional )     03 November 2010

@Roshani

If you were pissed off, how does it matter? 

Mature people argue in a calm and well thought out manner, you seem to be in a hurry to somehow argue your half baked personal beliefs. 

Your replies would have pissed off poor and disabled persons certainly. 

And what about your long long long replies, all the time blaming in laws and harping on bank accounts of the would be groom. 

Roshni B.. (For justice and dignity)     03 November 2010

@ above

 u have always have so many ugly & name calling arguments wid members with differing views.......so wot abt u?are u calm/compsed?abt me,i dont call names here...

if my knowledge or thots are half baked,tell me ur own knowledgeable contribution in family forums.even one,besides these arguments...

u said it doesnt matter if i get pissed off.no issues...same way if u or sum1 else fails to understand wot i am implying,he starts fighting/lecturing all of which shows he's also pissed off?isnt he?

you commenting upon me right now also shows u r pissed off...arent u? o'wise y wud u bother?

so before u point 1 finger at me,dont forget the remaining 3 are pointed at you only..

abt me i am sure of wot i write...dont need ur or any1's approval..

good night!

Avnish Kaur (Consultant)     03 November 2010

watever it may be. just decide that u are sure u want to laeve her.

ok sure. u want to leave her.

no annulment or divorce possible based on these facts.

yes , you can file for divorce on basis of cruelty by filing false 498a.

contact an expert honest cunning lawyer, and u got the divorce.


(Guest)

 

Mahesh Naik,

 

Roshni B and Avnish Kaur gave advise for you.

first give more info as roshni asked for .(you only said ,I donot want her...i need divorce.... or else i will go out of home....)

If not then follow the advise that Avnish Kaur had said.




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