|Originally posted by : tanya singh
||I was in a relationship for 3 years. And we were friends from past 5 years. We love each other unconditionally. We had s*x and had abortion 3 times. He promised to marry me. Afterwards i stopped giving him too attention due to my friends problems and study. And he broke up with me.After using me for 3 years he suddenly started looking for a virgin sati savitri type female to get married, after 3 years he changed his mind, not me, then why should only I suffer alone?
By reading your bit it feels like you had s*x first and then did kasme vaade of doing some more s*x after marriage?
Rape is universally considered to be amongst the most morally and physically reprehensible crimes in society, an assault on the body, mind, privacy and the entire fabric of the victim. Rape is a crime of violence, a denial of s*xual freedom, and a privacy violation.It is often said that a woman who is raped undergoes two crisis- the rape and the subsequent trial. However good the law may be, rape is a difficult crime to prove,given the generally weak investigative framework, and too many technicalities on the basis of which an accused can go free. There are too many steps that must be taken by the police to ensure that there is enough evidence available and more often than not the accused is set free due to lack of evidence and the vulnerable and feeble victim is humiliated and her dignity is shredded by the system which she trusted to give her justice. The societal stigma attached to the crime is such that many a times a crime would go unreported by the victim, in order to escape the repercussions she will be subject to by the society.
Section 375 embodies and defines the conditions under which a man can be convicted of rape read with Section 90 along with judicial decisions provides the basic framework of rape law in India.
In addition to being a crime of violence, rape can also be committed by obtaining consent by undue influence, fraud or cheating. One of the fundamental issue in the offence of rape is consent. Its presence or absence makes s*xual intercourse lawful or unlawful. ‘Consent’ matters because to locate consent with respect to s*xual intercourse is to locate the normative boundary between criminal rape and non-criminal s*x. Consent may be implicit or implied, coerced or misguided, obtained willingly or through deceit. The question of determining Consent can be tricky at times, and the dilemma becomes apparent when it comes to s*xual intercourse on a false promise to marry.
MEANING OF CONSENT-
Section 375 culls out different grounds under which an act of s*xual intercourse with a woman will amount to rape. One of the grounds is “absence of consent” of a woman. Section 90 provides a negative definition of the word ‘Consent’. The sections says that "A consent is not such a consent as it intended by any section of this Code, if the consent is given by a person under fear of injury, or under a misconception of fact, and if the person doing the act knows, or has reason to believe, that the consent was given in consequence of such fear or misconception."
Now 3 yyears you kept sleeping and having s*x with this man, this was consensual.
Consent under this code is not valid if obtained by either misrepresentation or concealment, and implies not only a knowledge of the risk but a judgement in regard to it, a deliberate free act of mind.Consent given under a misconception is invalid if the person to whom the consent is given is aware of its existence, however an honest misconception by both the parties, however, does not invalidate consent.
This was s*x and plain s*x and nothing else. You should have continued that way and avoided these marriage proposals. Or were you having s*x with him so that one day you will make him marry you ?
All these plans fail. Going to court is doing self rape. I am not joking but this is a fact. MeToo Campaign is a well thought marketing gimmick to bring back into limelight those in film line who were almost forgotten or forgotten.
Ultimately your man wanted someone who is sati savitri only and not you. That shows that the mentality of Indian Men is still the same, they can use women and women let men use them as pleasure toy and then want fresh pc for marriage who did not do s*x at all?
Its like if I have wife she should be fresh one, not used one.
You can file criminal breach of trust case on your man. Rape case wont stand, it was just live in relationship and you may claim montly maintenance of 1/3rd of his salary through PWDVA act. But it will be self rape/self torture, filing cases and trying to get justice.
What I suggest is he moved on, you also move on, forget all the old thing and find someone new boy and marry, this time go with intent of marrying and not what you did last time.
Hope you take it in the right way.