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justice awaited (officer)     20 April 2012

Written deposition on child custody

dear members and experts

           i and my husband filed mutual divorce petition on out of court settlement that he wont return the dowry amount and my earnings which he kept forcefully( the amount runs into lakhs) and that i can keep child 4 year old son with me. i am planning to go to uk where my brother resides. after knowing this he withdrew his consent from mutual divorce. i have following queries

1. if i go for contested divorce how much time does it consume? i have heard it is around 2 years. it might drag more bcoz he wants to drag the case so that i cannot move abroad.

2. he is asking me to give in written that if i move abroad or if i remarry the child's custody will be tranferred to him. what if i write it now take a divorce and move abroad after informing court that nobody can control my life after divorce and it is illegal to barr somebody to move abroad and remarry.

 i have lost everything 10 years of my life , my earnings and mental peace . and now he wants child also. i do not want to file a contested divorce because it will reflect on my son because that would create a tense atmosphere in my home.

kindly help me in this regard. thanx. 


 4 Replies

Adv.R.P.Chugh (Advocate/Legal Consultant (     20 April 2012

Dear Querist,


Nothing that you decide as regards the custody of the child would take a back seat. The first and foremost consideration is that the welfare of the child is of paramount consideration. There are no rights/strict formulae when the custody matters are concerned, the orders can always be varied. In a similar case such yours in Vikram Vohra v. Shalini Bhalla (2010)  In this particular case the Husband and wife decided on divorce, that wife is to have custody Husband only visitation rights, now the wife got a great career opportunity in Australia, the husband moved for custody on the ground that :-

i) Wife going back on her word;

ii) His visitation rights would be defeated as he won't be able to go to Australia;

The SC held that a woman cannot be asked to choose between her child and career, and held she was entitled to take child along, notwithstanding the earlier agreement. 

Hope this helps you, Feel free to talk!

1 Like

justice awaited (officer)     20 April 2012

thank you sir for your early reply. i want to reconfirm that my husband is asking to deposit the above two conditions in written. so should i give a written undertaking now and then move ahead with my plans.


threeleafe (awaited)     20 April 2012

Sorry GP

You will have to first realise that child belongs to both and is not your property.


You sense of pain is comming from your skewed sense of ownership.


Husband has equal right to oppose divorce - think about the loss he has gone through in last ten years from this relationship,  If you come out of your current mode of "Only my pain matters"  you guys can sit across table and develop a solution

justice awaited (officer)     20 April 2012

dear threeleafe,

           i agree with you and i would not like to barr my kid from meeting with his father. because i am answerable to my kid once he grows up. if i do not let him meet now my kid might suspect me in future that i might have been at fault that is why i did not let him meet his far as you say that my husband has lost 10  years in this relationship i dont agree with you. he has earned a lot kept a huge amount of dowry in cash and my earnings for 3 years. never told me about where he kept his and my earning.i tried to tell him to come to marital counsellar but he said he is perfect dosent need any counselling i am at fault. i tried to save the relationshp for 2 years but he did not realize now he wants to oppose divorce not because he wants to stay with me but because he does not want my career to grow and that i cannot be happy after remarrying. he dosent plan to remarry be he has some s*xual dysfunction which he realizes very well but does want to accept. so he trying to drag the case.

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