Ravinder Kumar (Account Director) 14 May 2011

Wife demands 50% salary, neither coming back nor Divorce

Dear All

Dear All,

I have filed for RCR with the Gurgaon Distt family court in March 2010 and my wife has denied to joined me twice, once in Lok Adalat n once in Mediation center. The judje has now asked me to provide evidence in my next date. I am also paying maitenance to her for my son. It has been openany said by my in-laws, wife, her relatives and her lawyer that whatever possible I do, she will not return back and will not give divorce either and will continue hurting me financially and mentally till the time my son is 18.

I request your suggestions on my following queries,

1. Can they really do what they are threatening to do. I have never done anything wrong to her and loved her the most in my life. But the problem started when she got pregnent and her parents wanting her to do the the delivery at their place. We did not had any issue with that but somehow her parents thought that we may not agree to it so one day her father came (October 2008) and took her stating that she is not feeling well and will send her back in 8-10 days. After 10 days when we called he said he will send after the delivery which was scheduled around 2.5 months later.

During that time we had fight and I even went to the extent of saying to my father in law that he allowed her wife to come back and stay after 15 years of separation but I will not. This thing hurted his ego and now considers me the biggest enemy. My mother in law lived 15 years with her parents after my wife got birth.

2. Me and my family have made countless efforts to purse them to send her back but that person is not ready to hear. Initially my wife agreed to come back in absence of her father but later her father denied to send her back and she did not opposed that. My father in law is a person who does not have any friends, do not goes to functions and do not talk to neighbours. He is in depression since his left him and evenafter she returned back they do not live as husband wife. They live in separate corners of their house in different rooms.

3. I have tried my best to get her back and still wants to. I dont think I will be able to love anyone in my life as much I love her. But, now its almost 3 years since she has left me and not a single time she called me and now she is threatening me too. Iknow want to just get out of this relationship so that I atleast can concentrate on my career without all this tension, othetr I will too go into depression and become a Physic as my father in law.

4. Do I wait for the RCR judjement and than for one more year or do I file for divorce immediately. I have lot of points proving cruelty for that matter. But which way it will be more easy and fast because they do not want me to have divorce.

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7 Replies

Deep (k) 14 May 2011

Did court grant any maintenance, if not continue with whater you are giving. How the RCR is going, wait, let the time go, everything will be all right.......

Further experts will advice you....... where are Ld Menal & Roshani, pls advice in right manner......

1 Like

Self service (None) 14 May 2011

Its Court that decide divorce not your wife. Don't worry continue with RCR and keep collecting evidences of cruelity. Leaving matrimonial home without any reason is also cruelity. Later based on RCR decision/Duration of seperation and evidences of cruelity file for divorce after discussion with lawyer.

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Ravinder Kumar (Account Director) 14 May 2011

I have not recieved any order from High court so am paying as directed by the district family court on time..RCR is getting delayed by one reason or other, now the next date is on July 30 for presenting witnesses...My wife has already denied to come back once in lok adalat and one in Mediation center, but I dont know how it will help me..

My wife is the only child and now her father is getting retired, so now he will have more time to harass me.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner ) 14 May 2011

@ Author

1. See Lok Adalat and Mediation reports either say Compromised OR Failed. Hence what she said before either forum are just matter of servicing the case in trial Court and can't be used as any intricate case value means as for any material facts.

2. Based on your brief there are two options; one get in whatever time RCR in your favour and lead a Romeo life thinking of your love for her and let divine intervention help both of you; second is to convert the RCR into divorce based on your quote that you have collected evidences of cruelty. n all it is just matter of time for which you need to have patience.

3. Concerning your youth and career what you are supposed to do is to have a dual lifestyle one for furthering your career and looking after your health and your left out family and second you now know for sure that she obeys command of her father hence let her father spoil her life unless and until you know 10-0% that she is on your side I could have advised for HC intervention such as protection order for couple with kid from In Laws but since you are not that sure hence this option may be ruled out. Bottom line carry forward with your life and in confidence with your hired ld advocate service as per its own course the only one case in hand.

4. She has come from a highly insecure family and on top during pregnancy and Postpartum depression (PPD), also called postnatal depression, is a form of clinical depression which can affect women and recognising early the signs is a art which many a young couple in nuleus family unknowingly fail to discuss / relaise early on top she was sent back to same insecure family so in all this briefs depicts you are not at fault but the situation (her family history) have made things complicated hence remove your guilt feeling and mild depression stage you are on and off feeling now a days and carry forward with your life as life gives much more than such immature losses meant it to be.

5. BTW both of you are beyond clinical councelign stage as her fathers needs such clinical visits more than her daughter. So how one can bell the cat !

2 Like

Arup (UNEMPLOYED) 15 May 2011

YAA ...

ANOTHER CASE OF METRO MAINTENANCE!

1 Like

Ravinder Kumar (Account Director) 15 May 2011

@Tajobsindia: I thank you for your valuable and motivating advise. You have understood exactlly the way am feeling from the last few months...

Ravinder Kumar (Account Director) 15 May 2011

I understand that my wife is not completely at fault and I do not want her to suffer now or later in life.

Even a divorce will be good for her than this phase, where she is neither able to concentrate on her career nor on upbringing of our son...We both are just fighting for worse and to satisfy her fathers ego..