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gaurav (executive)     27 January 2011

What should I do..?

 

Hi...

After My father sad demise on 27.02.10, my life left my house without informing me on 27.05.10 with the help of his lawyer bro. in the absence of mine.My wife has a tendency to shout loudly on me & my elder family members. even she shouting on my mother during the my father sad demise process of 13 days... she is pregnent  2.5 months.she is under influence of her brother & mother. she is BSC(bio), B.Ed, MA ( eng), M Phil ( eng.), MBA ( HR) but she has react, act only her brother thoughts. Her family members interference in my married life is too much. If her family told her leave your husband she can leave me anytime....? I was Married In June 2009.My wife left my house on 27.05.10 because of she is shouting on my mother & ignoring & not providing food to me from last 6 days  because of little argument has happend in between me & wife  6 days back. while on shouting my mother , I also throw few bad words on her. due to this incident, she want to leave my house  at night, this thing will creat argument inbetween us. During argument, she told me that i want to abort this child & want to leave that house. so due to this statement . I lost my control & slept her& she creat scene for this  thing. Her family members at that time very abusive to me & my family members.result of that incident , from last 8 months she is silent & not attampt a single call to me. when i intend to call her her mother & brother not allow me to talk with her & insult me & all my family members. in the mean while , I have got  a baby -boy. my brother in law inform me. when I reached to see my child, they insult me a lot in hospital & not allow to talk my wife. when i explain to them whole thing on 04.10.10. Even understanding everything that - it is little misunderstanding. they want to dominate my family because they knows that no elder in my family, I am whole & sole incharge of family.. they are used to threatning me & my mother will impose on u false cases.... Everytime when i used to reconcile  with my wife her brother not allowed me to talk my wife . when i asked him to send her he always told me that just ask your mother, jija's mausa & other relative to say sorry in front of my sister & then take her back......I love my wife a lot  but i also love my my mother because she needs me a lot at this time . In this painfull time she never ever try to speak with me at all from last 8 months...What should I do..? 

They close all gates of communication inbetween me & my wife . they want to dominate my family so that they are silent since last 8 months....... due to this incident I lost my job as well 4 months back.... Even they are not allowed  to see my child as well . even they are not sending picture of my child.... My child has harmonical disorder. due to this he has to face 2 surgeries at the time of 6 months &  completion of 2 years... I am silent because i  can't allow my wife to live my life with her to loose my dignity, self respect & my parents respect....

What should I do..... Is there any law who help me on this matter...... My wife is following his lawyer brother instructions......Pls. advise to copeup with this situation.....

 



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 22 Replies


(Guest)

 

@gaurav

AS you said,'.I love my wife a lot  but i also love my my mother because she needs me a lot at this time ."

Better to choose one as you have no option .

Better to live separately with your wife.buy house near your mother resides or hire a house.

First try to reconciliation and live with her.

 

NOW As you said,"Even understanding everything that - it is little misunderstanding. they want to dominate my family because they knows that no elder in my family, I am whole & sole incharge of family.. they are used to threatning me & my mother will impose on u false cases.... Everytime when i used to reconcile  with my wife her brother not allowed me to talk my wife . when i asked him to send her he always told me that just ask your mother, jija's mausa & other relative to say sorry in front of my sister & then take her back......I love my wife a lot  but i also love my my mother because she needs me a lot at this time . In this painfull time she never ever try to speak with me at all from last 8 months...What should I do..? "

If this things is happens too much( A REAL ONE AND YOU DONT HAVE ANY OPTION LEFT) then no solution .

Better to file for divorce but for sake for your BABY TRY  step.

And tell me is your wife listen your voice and what your qualification ?


gaurav (executive)     27 January 2011

 

hanks Mr. Vyas

she don't have problem specifically with my mother. she is very image contious lady. Anybody who point out her mistakes is enemy for her.. at heart she is not bad person. but when 2 person were bound with others with knot of marriage. we have to adjust according to situations... As we both are new to this relation , we have to adapt each other plus or minuses...& support each other in good & bad situation. but she is not ready to adjust in life. After having of all degree's , she has not ability to to do things to her own... she is having under influence of her brother & mother. what they told her she react accordingly... & her brother & mother reacting like a animals. they are giving me pain to keep my wife & child away & silent. they are doing nothing but to threaten me & my family or to keep silent.I am also MBA - Finance. My wife knows that I lost my father last year - in this painful moment she left me alone , even she knows i loose my job because of her family politics. she has no soft corner at all. she is following his lawyer brothers instruction. & they are doing dirty family politics. she told me that she has no concern for me .. wether I Alive Or not.....? I almost bag infornt of her every family members.... but they are very cruel, shameful person.....First of all, I am not in favor of divorce at all...... her parents interference is too much our life . their interference will not create understanding in between me   & my wife........

gaurav (executive)     28 January 2011

Thanks Avnish Ji

Thanks for valuable link..but these are the procedures for taking divorce on the groud of cruelty... I want to know  the legal rights/ procedure of married husbands to reconcile with his wife when her parents do not allow to see his wife, talk with wife in person & not allow to see his newly born child...

Is there any law exsist in india where married husband having right to speak/ chat/ discuss/ meet freely..

Is there any law exsist in India who stop married woman's parent  to interfere in her daughter's married life & stoping  her husband to meet with his wife.....

In my case--- My wife's cusion's brother is a well known lawyer... her family is following his instructions.. & doing all dirty things....& taking silence in between me & My wife....

I want to know wether this silence in between me & my wife going against me in future or against my wife...

Can she impose false allegation on me or my family after keeping a silence of 1 years on me & my family....

What type of streitergy they are following.. I am not understanding. Legally..... after closing any type of negotiation/ reconcilation...............

 

Please advice.....

Gaurav

gaurav (executive)     28 January 2011

 

Thanks Avnish Ji

Thanks for valuable link..but these are the procedures for taking divorce on the groud of cruelty... I want to know  the legal rights/ procedure of married husbands to reconcile with his wife when her parents do not allow to see his wife, talk with wife in person & not allow to see his newly born child...

Is there any law exsist in india where married husband having right to speak/ chat/ discuss/ meet freely..

Is there any law exsist in India who stop married woman's parent  to interfere in her daughter's married life & stoping  her husband to meet with his wife.....

In my case--- My wife's cusion's brother is a well known lawyer... her family is following his instructions.. & doing all dirty things....& taking silence in between me & My wife....

I want to know wether this silence in between me & my wife going against me in future or against my wife...

Can she impose false allegation on me or my family after keeping a silence of 1 years on me & my family....

What type of streitergy they are following.. I am not understanding. Legally..... after closing any type of negotiation/ reconcilation...............

 

Please advice.....

Gaurav

Avnish Kaur (Consultant)     28 January 2011

now there are two ways:

1.try reconciliation by Filing RCR , but here there is a risk of false cases against you .

2. File divorce on ground of cruelty, here also u risk false cases but with less lethal effects.
if u file divorce , then court will definitely give u chances to talk to each other at least thrice before deciding on the case.

my advice will be to file divorce taking into view all the situation, but try reconciliation in court after u file divorce, and if still you two cannot settle to live together , part peacefully.

gaurav (executive)     28 January 2011

Avnish ji

What is the  difference in RCR & divorce case..?

gaurav (executive)     29 January 2011

is there anybody who want to give advice on my matter.... pls. seriously need this..?

jesicakalra (Lawyer)     31 January 2011

MUtual understanding is best option for you..

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(Guest)

@ GAURAV :-

1) If you want to continue your marriage with your wife :-

1) RCR means Restitution of conjugal rights, that means this law try to help & save the marriage . If your wife has deserted you, you can certainly file RCR and can ask for counselling & mediation. And you can put your points that you want to be with your wife and your baby, and want to lead a happy life.  Moreover if you file RCR their will be less risk of false cases like 498 etc. But you will file a divorce case under cruelty then the chances are more that you face false cases like 498 etc. Because that will be an outcome of anger & revenge, whereas RCR can irritate your wife but at the same time it can help you. And even if your files 498 it can be considered as a thoughful plan. 

2) If you want to end your marriage :-

2) If you want to end your marriage then do it mutually with peace rather then inflicting false alligations.

After reading your post , i think you want to continue your marriage with you wife. If so then RCR will be good. 

2 Like

(Guest)

@ Gaurav

One thing more if you file a divorce case and think that during mediation & counselling you reconcile then just forget it, once you file a divorce case after that 0.1 chances will be their for reconciliation.

You want to save your marriage , and you are not ready for divorce. You just want to reduce or stop the interference of your inlaws, then certainly RCR can help you.  Is this situation if you are not willing to part away from your wife, then i won't ask you to file for divorce .  You can give it a try for your baby.

All the best Mr Gaurav.

2 Like

gaurav (executive)     06 February 2011

Thanks Ms. Komal

I am 100% agreed with you..  I am not in a favor of to file divorce at all because adaptability accordig situation is must.. but my problem is that my wife is totally out of picture. she is under influence of her family. two person in her family are totally stop/end every way of communication. her brother( who is lawyer) & her mother. They also want to reconcile but they want to hurt me, force me & my family member to  beg in front of her family, they want total dominance on over my family & family matter so that their sister/ daughter will take a charge of my family. that's way they are silent at all... they are punishing me / hurt me & my family to stay silent ... they are happy to keep her daughter to their home with my baby.. they know that , I required emotional support of my wife & recently born child... & my wife is totaly silent to react against her family..... after having lot's of digree's she is not applying her own mind....... Even my wife also not want a sepration... but she is following her family guildlines. she don't have curtsy to do her own.. not even speak... So I want to know about any law or legal plateform to use against my In laws to take my wife back & counceling her to understand about our married life & child'd future.......How Can I do.. .?

Gaurav


(Guest)

@ Gaurav

You need to make a proper legal draft, stating your points, that you love your wife and baby, want them back. You and your family will love to take care of them with due respect & regards. You don't want any seperation or divorce. You want your wife to join you soon with baby and lead a happy & respectful life. Send this leagl draft to your inlaws address through registry post, and also submit this to the nearest police station.  File a formal complaint against your inlaws that they are not allwing to meet your wife & baby and contact her,  

You can take help from the police station, and ask them to call your inlaws at police station for a decent dicussion & counselling.

And if you want to do it in personal level then you will have to go and talk to your inlaws . Have a discussion on their demands, be cool try & understand their intension.  Look gaurav certain compromises are required when such cases arises. So don't be too rigid.  Be cool and try and understand what is their intension, if you are hessitant to mention here all the details and their intension then you can give you mail id will contact you and try to help you to resolve things.

All the best

2 Like

gaurav (executive)     06 February 2011

My mail id is zindgi123in@gmail.com... R U practicing advocate...yes , i want to discuss my case....pls. advice


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