Criminal Trident Pack: IPC, CrPC and IEA by Sr. Adv. G.S Shukla and Adv. Raghav Arora
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victim (master)     02 November 2012

Rcr hma sec 9 - please suggest a strategy

My question is how to call wife for RCR proceedings ( i am planning to file very soon). if she goes for 498a or dv or crpc 125 or hma 24 then no issue I am prepared to fight on merits. But if no response of any sort is given by her to the notice then how to proceed. I learned in this foroum only that Ex-parte is not of much use. What are the other ways to call her to court for rcr proceedings. I dont want to give divorce as my marriage is 9 months old only she left my home 5 months back. Every day I am trying to convince them for reconcilation, i involved few common relatives and family friends but all efforts went futile. they are neither clearing their demands to us nor comming for discussions.

Suggest a strategy which will help my case.

thankyou in advance

regards

victim



Learning

 14 Replies

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     02 November 2012

First decide why you want to call wife to Court sightseeing is it for below missing you understatement;

Essence of Family Law in India;

YOU  KNOW  YOUR  WIFE  WELL  ONLY  WHEN  YOU  MEET  HER  IN  COURT' By: A Men's Rights Activist 

On ground level understanding ways is it to restart conjugality or just to showcause persuasive side in S. 125 CrPC (neglect ground)?

Why I hinted above bze your opening second line contradicts first line of your very brief (duality of mind)!

victim (master)     02 November 2012

1) why you want to call wife to Court

Respected sir. as mentioned in my initial post "I dont want to give divorce as my marriage is 9 months old only she left my home 5 months back. Every day I am trying to convince them for reconcilation, i involved few common relatives and family friends but all efforts went futile. they are neither clearing their demands to us nor comming for discussions."

i just want them to stop this hide and seek game and make their intentions clear to me wheather they want to continue or not if yes then their terms for that or if no then their terms and demands for the same. i tried my level best to call them for discussion. i said that i will come if you dont want to come they said no. still i went to their place but they shifted somewhere else and not disclosing their where abouts to me. every time they come up with new allegation against my various family members who might visited our home may be once after marriage. I love my wife want her to live peacefuly and with respect at her matrimonial home. but no cooperation from that side.

2) ‘YOU  KNOW  YOUR  WIFE  WELL  ONLY  WHEN  YOU  MEET  HER  IN  COURT' By: A Men's Rights Activist 

very true i have an idea about that as i had been abused very badly by her on phone many times during these months. then also i want to meet her to give her benifit of doubt that may be she misunderstood something and doing this but without meeting how can this be resolved.

3) On ground level understanding ways is it to restart conjugality or just to showcause persuasive side in S. 125 CrPC (neglect ground)?

surely i want to restart conjugality. but at the same time i cant put my other family member in risk. as allegations made by them are very serious and baseless. they cant be ignored. how long i can wait by fearing bunch of false cases on me from them. if they are of that mentality they will surely do sooner or later. so i thought which is to be faced must be faced sooner than later. i can assure u sir i am not with ill intentions. i want everyone ( me, my wife, my family, my inlaws) to live happily without any pressure and fear.

sir please suggest me some strategy to proceed further. i will be more than happy to give any clearification on this issue. thanks in advance.

regards

victim

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     02 November 2012

Ok, in that case frankly there is no particular strategy for RCR play in given facts filled stage as yours.

Reason being you are trying your level best for conjugality via two parallel approach; Social and Legal, hence, it is the best strategy you need to self evolve upon as and when further developments takes place. Well you and or she cannot (unless extreme facts emerges which I see none) file for divorce!

As far as “binding or compelling” her to come to Court that also in RCR suit matter is concern, what will happen is in due course of time in Family Court is that as usual an Order for reconciliation / mediation reference will be made but if her Lawyer is appearing then s/he can make a “say” as per instructions received from his/her client (i.e. your wife) behalf which you watch otherwise the whole proceeding will eventually end up ex-parte way if she is not vigilant enough to maintain conjugality at all.

Also in expanded “facts” you placed subsequently before the forum, RCR is the alternate best option well chosen by you to pursue marital bonding with a un-willing other spouse.

Hence wait and watch development taking place at the Board.


[Last reply]

1 Like

Rahul Kapoor (Legal Enthusiast)     02 November 2012

RCR is a useless remedy

Chetan Joshi (Advisory/Advocacy)     02 November 2012

RCR doesnt workout.....all it does is delay in divorce...

victim (master)     02 November 2012

@I am Altruist

then suggest me a suitable alternative. I learned about few Disadvantages of rcr but tell me what are other alternatives when other party is not at all interested in any sort of discussion about anything. Moreover making baseless and false allegations. Even they are not taking any legal actions against us if we are that wrong. In this forum only i studied in many threads that wife and inlaws filed completely false 498a and dv after 2 years of desertion and in some cases even after divorce. this shows if they want to do such thing they can do it anytime and they will surely do whenever they want to trouble you. irrespectiveof your filing or not filing of rcr. i tried a lot to search for other safe and effective alternatives to save my marriage but failed to find that, if you know any such alternative method please let me know i will be thankful to you for that.

regards

victim.

Rajan Bhasin (Law Student)     03 November 2012

Leave her alone for some time, If She come back OK, Else move on............

Nandha (NIL)     04 November 2012

@victim,

 

I am not a lawyer, i am also a victim like you. My case is also similar to yours. 

 

An unwilling wife is always a trouble in ur life. When a girl & her family did not listen to respected elders, it means they are not bothered about the society. They will for sure go on a revenge mode even if you file RCR.  It seems you dont have a child from your marriage. You are also prepared to face 498A,DV etc., In such case, you can straightaway get into legal battle. 

 

Only when the case comes to the court, any sort of mutual consent settlement will happen.  

 

 

 

 

 

Aneesh Trivedi (Advocate)     04 November 2012

i am fightng the case chance of wining but time,money and peace killing, i won sec 09 , so contest the case if really innocent is better strategy  and after some we start enjoying the case and fignt with more courage on the other hand wife side will go down as we go up just like balance, taraju and left all on destiny whaterver insaf ka taraju decide is good for us, so keep on fighting read the post , of possoble join forum and do home work regularly properly read the citations , judgemtn and you are luck that many learned people say tajobs india, lada ji, sethi sir , saraf sir, prajapati, qureshi ji. last but not least shoney kapur sir all are here to properly guide us, read their post answres they are serving her just like a humnity work, equal to donating lacks of rupees, so keep trust over them here and on god also , relax take nice sleep and enjoy the phases of life and it sure wife will be sufferer if  she win or lose,


(Guest)

RCR is just a colossal waste of time and money.

The compliance of a RCR decree is at the sweet will of the spouse against whom it has been passed. No penal consequences flow out of the violation of a RCR decree.

1 Like

Aneesh Trivedi (Advocate)     05 November 2012

RCR is not a waste of time, if husband/wife not communicating with each other then by using RCR it clear the mentality of other party  if willing ot join then it goes to withdraw if not then wife file counter cases, in that period the mentality of all involved persion get cleared and then person is abel to finilize his actions and able to decide what to do or not?

as RCR is not criminal its winning or loosing does not harm any one , so as i feel if dispute , differences conflict start arising and both parties are not showing any interest in procedding either for divorce or reuinion so at least RCR help to clear the idea it is not time consuming hardly it takes 1year , and it is better get the idea of other party than to suffer in if and buts..........or in making self assumptions..............

1 Like

Nandha (NIL)     06 November 2012

@Aneesh - you are right.

 

When wife has no serious allegations against husband and his family and has left the home because of her personal likes & dislikes, then wife side will not take the legal action at the first instance. They will neither come for discussion despite several efforts of common relatives nor go for legal action. This clearly shows that wife wants divorce but want to justify to the society that only "husband went to the court first" because he wanted divorce.

 

if you have kid then it will be a great joy for her to deprive the love of father, paternal grandparents for the kid. The kid will be her trump card to justify all her wrong doings.

 

When nothing is progressing, either patch up or separation, then RCR is the only way. It brings the real intention of wife to the light. Thereafter, it would be a clear battle. 

 

I also understand that after filing RCR, if your wife makes false allegations, we can withdraw RCR and file divorce straightaway. Correct me if i am wrong!

 

 

 

 

Aneesh Trivedi (Advocate)     06 November 2012

Originally posted by : Nandha


This clearly shows that wife wants divorce

no wife not want divorce her parents forcing her they poisioning her she is in dilema and she is stoping her parents to go for any legal action , here she have some love for husband. she want to kneel down husband she wants husb will come to her house and knee down , and pray then she go to husb house.

but want to justify to the society that only "husband went to the court first" because he wanted divorce.

 she never want to go to court or police if she then she directly went no one can stop her, i am taking abt those who have normal dispute difference with husb and not those ladies who have extra affair or want to get rid of husband immediately.she is silent means she is in confusion what to do?

if you have kid then it will be a great joy for her to deprive the love of father, paternal grandparents for the kid. The kid will be her trump card to justify all her wrong doings.

she is using kid as weapon against me here mind game started between us, who suffer more pain and not show it on face will win, and irritate other,

wife know she is deprivng kid from father love but she is cultured she calculate all paap punya etc so this is more torutures for her as she is hindu lady and devotee to god,

by using kid missile she dont want to kill me but by that she want to bow infront of her, as early as i bow matter get solved and we are happy.

nothing goes in bowing down to save marriage and family but one can saacrifeice ego, proud but not self respect to save marriage and family after all i love her and kid,

 When nothing is progressing, either patch up or separation, then RCR is the only way. It brings the real intention of wife to the light. Thereafter, it would be a clear battle. 

 if is use ful if file early , later after a gap of two or one and half year no need to patch up better to go for divorce, as during this gap love affection sympathy all wipeout and anger, revence, jealousy , fear come in mind to both side. so better to go for divorce after long gap if reunion is also there then that intimacy just as after marriage is not remains between them.

I also understand that after filing RCR, if your wife makes false allegations, we can withdraw RCR and file divorce straightaway. Correct me if i am wrong!
no never withdraw RCR if once file just win it then only it is useful as it clearly show that husb intention is to cohabit with her.
 

 

victim (master)     09 November 2012

Discussed with three lawyers. First lawyer said he wil surely manage ex-parte decree in span of 6 months only i need to pay bit extra than regular. ( i know thats not that easy and moreover my innervoice stops me for doing such things.) Second lawyer said after RCR hma sec 9 risk of false 498a and Dv increases and he asked me to be prepared for such cases even before she receives summons.( i dont know how wil she manage that). And to avoid or minimise effect of any such cases after filing rcr he adviced me or rather tried to convince me to file a strong criminal cases of theft and deception against her under pretext that she left home without my consent and w/o giving me info about her plans and took away all costly jewellery and my insurance policies and other documents. he further said that we will tell that cost of valuables was around 10 lacs.( my doubt which he was not able to clear that how will he justify filing rcr and calling a criminal chor wife back. moreover our whole family jewellery wont cost that much and how will i proof that i possess that much of valuables. one more thing she took the jewellery which was given to her by my mom as she has to attend some wedding there but that cost  70 thousand but for that reason i cant call her thief and file a false criminal case just to avoid or minimise risk of false 498a and dv.) Now third lawyer said that only one option is left that is filing filing rcr. for sure risk is there but if intentions are pure and hands are clean then proper justice is assured in courts. But then also its a tedious exercise and i need to rethink about this. After hearing everything he commented that as my wife was previously working and her whole salary was spent on her family and after marriage they are missing that thing and that family wants to dominate me and controll me and my finances thats why they are creating such scenes and constantly trying to feed things against my mom and dad. In nutshell that family is interested in money of their daughter and if possible then my money also and if i file RCR there are possibilities that they may claim maintenence under crpc 125 or hma 24. to trouble me and my family financially. then i asked him can i give information to all higher authorities of police and state that this all is happening and i am not complaining but just informinig you all, for that he said yes i can try that option as well.

kindly guide me to which authorities i should inform. how to draft such letters/applications. will emails to them work or i need to submit in person and in that case will they acknowledge the submission when required.

please guide me if this is possible.

thanks in advance

regards

victim


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