need advice

mrs

Hi,

I am in love with a married man ..who is trying his best to leave his wife.He has been married to her for 6 years..She has been harrasing him mentally and physically for all these years. She is demanding him 50 lakhs to get out of the marriage..which is so impossible.They have had a temple marriage with a temple marriage certificate.Some lawyer consulted by him said that the certificate does not proove that they are legally married so they cannot apply a divorce on the basis of the temple paper. so it can be mutualy sorted out ..

plz advice me on this. how can he get a dicorce from her ..as she isnot willing to give him divorce unless he pays her 50 LAKHS..How can he start a procedure for separation ?? is it necessary to be done before filing for any divorce procedure.?

 
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Every new girl who want to marry to a married man she thinks that husband's wife is harrasing him mentally and physically for all these years.(I am in love with a married man ---Ye sub filmy hota hai come out from them and know the reality after marriage you will know how love works or not?;()This is a very risky steps ,if you fails then you loose everything.Every girl are not shilpy shetty and every men are not raj kundra.;)

 

Do you have any proofs?any facts? Only you see first sight?( love at first sight)

 

If you marry to this man and after a years if another woman want to marry this husband then what you do?She also think that you have harrrass him a lot.

She is demanding him 50 lakhs to get out of the marriage..which is so impossible.

Kya kare wife? so it means she want to continue the marriage thats why she demand the whopping amount .

Temple marriage or not but marriage regiustration is must  but here the couple are living together for 6 years.

My advise is to better to forget this man and marry to another man.


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Senior Partner

@ Author,

Thanks to bringing to readers knowledge that a Hindu wife is harassing mentally and physically a husband with whom you want to marry provided he has a legal divorce from his first wife.

Some solutions:

1. Ask this man to collect taped and video evidences of "harassment" / torture meted out in the hands of his wife. Preserve them in a sealed CD and along with sufficient collection of such mental cruelties he can very well present a Divorce Petition before Court seeking Divorce on mental cruelties grounds. The temple marriage / un-registered marriage is no gro9unds not to file a Petition for Divorce.


2.
The CD is valid acceptable evidence of such mental cruelties. Given to understand the Court procedure and time it will take sometime to get a Decree of the proceedings. You may wait till then.


3.
He may be asked to pay interim maint. to his wife to run his Divorce case. A wife seeking 50 L from a husband shows the man is of some means (possibly atleast he is a mini lakhpatia) meaning thereby giving maint. to his wife to run the case may not be a major problem here as he is maintaining you too na inspite of being married on the go ! Further provided his wife is not working anywhere then no interim maint is even required to be awarded by Court. If he proves grounds of divorce then he is even not required ot pay her any alimony (that is one time settlement amount to wife).


4.
Once Decree in hand both of you need to wait for 90 days and if no Appeal against the Decree filed by wife then may have a marriage ceremony and register the same and carry forward with this man as your husband.


You as a un-married lady have got certain Constitutional Liberties and no one shall stop you "loving" a single and or a married man and films are films which showcause ordinary life’s in dramatized version and real life is practically different when two people fall in love and no one shall stop on account of one wife mental cruelties inflected upon her husband over a lover’s un-conditional love to this bechara middle mei fasa - Hindu man.

All the best.

 
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propra

You love him and not his money........................don't you?

 

Then just request your lover to  pay off 50 lacs to his wife...and then marry after he gets divorce from his wife.

 

 
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For justice and dignity

Kushan is right.

 

What kind of woman are you? Breaking another woman's home!

 

What is the guarantee your boy friend will remain faithful to you always?

 

Tomorrow he can leave you once another woman crosses his way!

 

See the latest example of Mohd. Azharuddin.He left his wife for Sangeeta Bijlani.Now he had another affair after being married to Sangeeta bijlani for many years...and left her.

I hope u also get the same treatment as sangeeta bijlani in your life.

even if u get married to him...u will be treated as a second grade wife everywhere.

more so because u were responsible for his break up...people always respect the first wife,if she was innocent.If you go to any social function with him,especially in  a traditional one like marriage,after seeing ur face they will murmur amongst themselves"oh she is the lady with whom he had an affair before breaking his marriage".(i have personally seen such cases).this is not USA where people are very nice to someone who entered his life after breaking his marriage.

i personally know of one family where the wife left her husband for someone else who was richer than her husband.now whereever the new husband goes alongwith her,people dont even talk to him.they have been married since 2000.but till now people have no respect.he is ignored by all.they did not even invite him to their homes after they were newly married.

now this girl is having problems with him too and regretting why she married him in the first place...because he too is not doing so well in his business...while her ex is presently doing v.well in his practice as a lawyer(he is a lawyer by profession)

dont follow tajob india's advice.

he cant use a taped conversation everywhere.it is not always relied upon.trust me!

he says u have the right to freedom to love sum1...u may love him in ur heart.but be practical also.why dont u meet singles and choose sum1 as ur life partner?

even if u marry him,later on he may find faults in u and compare u with his 1st wife

 

now coming back to the present..

his wife will file a 498A or other cases against him,and it will take many years in court.

 

by then u will become buddhi and this man may not like to marry a buddhi also.so he will either go after his 1st wife again or someone else who is younger after ditching you.as such he is unfaithful.

and tum haath malti rah jaana(rather this is wot u deserve)


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Senior Partner

@ Roshni

Can you rebut me as legal reliance, when you say and I quote you 

"dont follow tajob india's advice.
he cant use a taped conversation everywhere. it is not always relied upon. trust me!"


If you cannot bring on board any rebuttals on this evidentry subject then it is not nice to advise as above !


However I will wait from you what legal documents you are relying upon when already 6 HC's judgments as well as 2 SC Case laws are there under Family law (Divorce / Maint. / Alimony) which have relied upon taped / SMS conversation and granted Husband divorce till date to the best of my legal practice read with knowledge which I shared with this lady.....


And how writers can ignore when this lady is saying a truth that “his wife is harassing him mentally and physically” – so it seems you all writers want this lady to sit and meditate for this man now in his life and this husband is leading a blissful life kya with all those harassment metted out by his wife on him......…c’mn writers.....……perhaps it is rightly said ‘Women’s worst enemy is another women” like your coloured post as advise to this lady devour of any legal merits.


And way shall this wife file 498a as you are saying does the brief presented by this lady smell of ingredients of "any mental cruelties of husband on demand of dowry upon his wife?"……… no na then when simply because he is fed up with all these harassment he is planning to file a divorce kar ke puncha isney …..kya baat hai…… tabhi mai kahata ku kabhi kabhi ki Roshni tumhse mei confuse rahta hun jaab sey forum mei ayi hon jo ki kahati kya hon eik post mei aur dusarey post mei kutch aur pura 360 degree turn ………..chalo janey don apas mei ladai kar key kya karma mainey apsey thek hai apaki advise bhi

Ta ra ram pum pum....... 

 
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For justice and dignity

@ Tajobs

 

just as kushan said....any girl wanting to separate her lover from his wife will say wife is being cruel.

 

even some men lie to their lovers that my wife is being cruel,to get rid of her.

 

tajobs...aapse thori mai insaaniyat expect kar sakti hu kya?

 

u may be from a democratic country...where everyone has constitutional rights.but does it mean we misuse our rights to take away sum1's legal rights?

u talk a lot abt females misusing laws and all

 

but here u r teaching this selfish girl divya to misuse her constitutional rights..

if that be so,i see no harm if women misuse laws...

let innocent people go to jail...if u let an innocent wife suffer at the hands of cruel husbands and their cruel lovers

this woman divya is utterly selfish and may be lying to separate a couple...and u r telling her ways to fulfill her selfish needs?is it right on ur part?

 

ur one wrong advice can ruin someone's life...because we dont know wot situation the wife,her kids or her parents may be into!

please yry to understand...u r also a father of a daughter

 

if she demands 50 lakhs,how are u sure divya is telling truth?

 

even if it is true,how are u sure the wife is a cheat only becoz she demands this much?she may be forced to because of adequate damage done to her physically,mentally etc by her husband and this mean lady divya?

so without knowing whole situation, why do u advise women like divya different ways to break another woman's home whose story we dont know till now.

wen u advise a needy wife or husband i never say anyth. even if i may differ with u on a few points.

 

but here a selfish person is asking for ways to break a relationship,in which u r helping her...so here i am forced to speak up..


i talked of 498A because if a wife is being tortured for a divorce she may as well file it...

according to me we shud refrain from legally advising people here who seek advice for breaking a relationship...remember wot goes around comes around.

u r very fond of anand richa's meditations...i dont exepect a person into spirituality to be giving such advices...u must have also read and heard umpteen no. of times that wot goes around comes around...

divya will pay for her misdeeds,but y do u want to misuse ur legal knowledge into giving selfish advices to people...if u use it to help a genuinely needy person then only ur education and knowledge are worth of appreciation

i dont know about ur family structure...only that u r divorced

 

imagine if ur own sister or daughter was in place of this poor wife,and ur bro in law's or son in law's lover came here to seek advice,wud u advice her the same after knowing who she is?

put a hand on ur heart and answer me?

else...mujhe bhi jhagra nahi karna..u may choose to ignore..but if u reply i repeat my question in the above sentence..

 
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Senior Partner

@ Roshni gurudevi ji


Law is very clear and in law there is no place for sentiments and emotions. If we all agree to this then one may read further;


1. As a forum writer one should give legal advise based on presented brief not mixing this brief with some other brief and a writer should not act like THE Judge and not go into who is telling truth or lie as for exactly that purpose Court of Law is there in this Land. This I learnt from Archana and Suchitra they both are wonderful to the point writers till the women brigade including you overran this forum since past few months and turned it into a personal khap (said it in lighter spirits) and I can place materials of what way you all start writing then where you all take twist and then where the turns comes in same post so let us leave all these away from a brief such as this ladies enquiry. She is adult and knew all these before entering into a married men’s relationship and society is explicit in it and nothing new this lady is going to do and Indian society is today evolved to the point where medieval mindset are not required - one side you talk of empowerment and another side you want to be chained to sacredness, had it been so rosy today all these female laws were not required can you counter this argument at the end of the Board?.


2. If you want to convey a advise to someone in a legal forum convince with too the point Law in hand not with personal remarks as you are making to me then going to my child (if I have a child and if so then whose gender even you do not know BTW) then all these two were not enough then you crawled to my mother and my sister forgetting I am not at all a divorcee here and I have brothers too probably without knowing if one is alive or even not! Who is making a backdoor entry into my family and why ji…..Tell me great gurudevi ji is in Law when you plead (make a submission) do you talk if you married or divorcee then to first second and third generation before the Bench then come to your plaint arguments kya? If yes then your long paras on me are nice rebuttals minus what exactly I asked to you which you did not reply at all (tape recording / email printouts / sms admissible family law mei hai ki nahi yeh batao - dundho dundho citations aab) instead of going to my wife my daughter my sister or to my mother arey ruko ji aur bhi bahut female relatives hai meri joint family mei mere ghar mei madam………aab sabko lapetna hai kya issi post mei, kamal hai ji……...


3. However, if you want a reply to your direct que. to me I need not have to go American way to put my hand on my heart the way American's do, I will speak from my mouth which is what Indians do and it is going to be - YES - I stand by my advise which is too the point to a que. asked by a author read that again it has all the ingredients said in short way wherein I warned about long legal case - I also gave hint of spoiling someone’s life and finally talked of best evidence which is applicable to get out of a abusive relationship and why should I favor a wife if she is abusive given to understand from this brief? Do you expect all briefs in this LCI to be on Oath Affidavit paper kya to pass your or mine litmus test then only we will reply and who are we two to bound a new author for that.....we take things in public forums on face value not on personal judgmental value….


Painfully may I ask did your in-laws had any insaniyat upon you (this I am not supposed to ask directly not only to you or even to any authors / writers here but since you are requesting me to show insaniyat I asked). We Advocates are not here for an ideal husband and or an ideal wife situations nor legal advise within parameters of Family Law is meant for that in Legal forums for that social networking forums are there otherwise things would have been different today in society whose vowing you are casting upon me.


However, did you not like Anand Richa n uff oh I also listen to Shakira so there goes for a toss spirituality theory vowing on me, I am as spiritually corrupt as any other ordinary Indian is so nothing wrong and right in it for your records for next time quoting.........yaad dila dena mujhe fir se kissi aur post mei kya kaha tha aaz yaha......


[BTW, Aab mai batau apko kyu bura laga meri blunt legal advise !
Answer simple hai aap aaz bhi khoz rahi hai uss under ki shanti ko jo apko personal life mei nahi mili - apki various postings mei nazar ata hai who confused under wala dard] aap gender neutral posting nahi karati hai jaab mauka mila aap bhi lapet leti hai madam ji...aab dundho saab apani post mei kiss post ka re. de raha hun yaha  


Anyhow it is upto this lady what she want out of her life and or from her this married man's life who is in a abusive relationship now that she has both sides of views from various writers let her pick and choose what is good for her.  


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LAWYER-ADVOCATE

WITH REFERENCE TO YOUR DETAILS ABOUT THE MARRIAGE WITH MARRIED MAN. IT IS VERY RISKY FOR YOU. AS IN CASE COMPLAINT IS FILED BY FIRST WIFE UNDER SECTION 494 OF INDIAN PENAL CODE YO BOTH MAY BE ARRESTED AND IT WILL BE A SERIOUS ISSUE.

IT IS ADVISIBLE TO WAIT AND UNLESS LEGALY BOTH ARE SEPERATED ,NO ONE SHOULD INTERFERE IN MARRIED LIFE OF ANOTHER COUPLE. AS YOU ARE A LADY AND HENCE YOU SHOULD NOT RUIN THE MARRIED LIFE OF ANOTHER INNOCENT LADY.KINDLY NOTE THAT INDIAN LAW PROTECTS EVERY MARRIED WOMAN BY WAY OF MAINTAINENCE AND SEPERATE RESIDENCE IN CASE OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ,HENCE DO NOT TAKE ANY RISKY STEPS.

AS THE PERSON WHO IS READY TO LEAVE HIS  LEGALY MARRIED WIFE WHO STAYED WITH HIM FOR SIX LONG YEARS, AND YOU WANT TO MARRY THAT PERSON, THEN THERE ARE CHANCES THAT EVEN IF YOU MARRY HIM AFTER GETING HIM DIVORCED FROM FIRST WIFE, THE SAID CRIMINAL MINDED PERSON MAY LEAVE YOU FOR ANOTHER BETTER GIRL THAN YOU. SO BE CARE FUL AS THE PERSON WHO STAYS IN GLASS HOUSE SHOULD NOT THROW  STONES AT ANOTHER PERSONS HOUSE AS THEY MAY GET SIMILAR RESPONSE IN FUTURE .AS EVERY ACTION HAS EQUAL AND OPPOSITE REACTION. GOOD LUCK.


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For justice and dignity

@ Tajobs

 

I am not in a mood to argue.Even Nandkumar Jee above is saying the same thing that I said.

 

No good lawyer with a heart will suggest this mean woman various techniques to break someone's home.

there may be citations where recordings wud have been used to show cruelty.but in another thread where the use of "vulgar language as ground for divorce" was discussed,prabhakar jee had very clearly said,by posting its judgement that mere recordings wont do....there have to be many instances of cruelty over a long period of time.after all,any1 in anger can say 100 things,if provoked.that doesnt make him a habitual abuser.

Lastly,before ending this argument,I will clarify that I did not "drag" your family members like daughter and sister,as per your perception.i am not interested in making scapegoats out of innocent people who are in no way related to the matter in question.

I simply asked u,if u were into same situation where the rights of ur sister or daughter were involved,what wud ur stand have been?

 

And i did not take your mother's name at all...i dont know where u read it!

Bye..

 
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