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san   16 April 2016

My husband asking divorce...

Hi, My husband and their family members has avoided me, because of i gave birth for GIRL child and they expecting more dowry too from my side. He tourcher me when baby born, he fight and try to beat my mother on 7th day of my delivery & while i go center,he push me. My C-section stitch has released, till 1.6 years, he and his parents not talking and coming to see me and baby. I talk with them, with keeping all relatives,women trust, their family members, gave police station complaint, etc. but no use, he is sailing in same boat. He asking mutual divorce to do remarry. When baby born 4 months, he applied for remarriage in Tamilmatrimony(i having his ID too). This much of days he not give a single amount.Financially im in very abd situatuion to handle day-today expense, by keeping 1.6 years baby. My final point is, i not interested to give divorce, because he tourcher me and spoiled me and my baby's life and planning to do second marriage. can you please help me to give your suggestion.As well as can u please tel me about, how to get a maintanence from my husband? and how many days it will take to approve, if i file the same in court.


 17 Replies


Religion for personal law required please give details 

Cr. P.C. 125 for maintaince it applicable to all

But you please state religion of all parties involved so better ans. can be given 

LegalFighter (test)     17 April 2016

Queriest, please answer the following questions? 1.are you educated? 2.did u have work experience? 3.do you have any evidence of ur husband or ur in laws torture? 4.do you love your husband much?


My final point is, i not interested to give divorce, because he tourcher me and spoiled me and my baby's life and planning to do second marriage.

If he tortured you and spolied your life, why you want to be his wife? Why not divorce him and find a better partner for rest of your life? There is no point of staying married simply to be a thorn for him. Thorn will hurt you and your baby also. Either find a way to get back together as a family or get rid of the marriage and create a new life free from baggage. 

You have right to get maintenance for your child. First send him a letter and ask him to pay for baby's needs. Tell him that he is required by law to pay.

If he ignores then talk to a lawyer and go to court for maintenance. Depending on various circumstances it can take 1 year or more to get maintenance order.

Going to court as first option will make him more adamant and then you will have to spend more energy, time and money to get the same maintenance. 




Ravi (Consultant)     17 April 2016

You say you have no money and at the same time you say he demand Dowry. for sure you are saying that coz some how you want to get Maintenance from him filling false Dowry case.

You reported to Police also and they have not done anything means you are at fault and you were trying to mis use law

For sure this marriage will not work. you may be harassed him and his family now after Girl Child(thinking she will look after you when you are old) you want easy way out with money.

if you do not want husband, why you want his money. Give his Girl Child to him and move on without any money from him.

For sure you will not do that.

KS Johal   17 April 2016

You need to decide if you want to stay with your husband or not. If you decide to stay then you need to find out a way in which you can reconcile all your previous issues and move on in life. In this case you may need to put up with some issues that he or his parents will continue to do so. On the other hand if you decide that you do not want to stay with your husband anymore due to the torture that you are receiving from him and his family, then you need to see a good advocate to take you out of this mess. Remember if you are being tortured by him and his family and you have tried all possibilities in order to reconcile and it has not worked, then my suggestion is that you move on. If you are considering not taking divorce but staying with him and at the same time you are seeking maintenance that may not be possible through the court. If you are seeking separation or divorce from your husband then you must go for maintenance. The court will decide on the level of maintenance that you receive which will be based on your personal circumstances. KS Johal

A walk alone (-)     17 April 2016

If you dnt want to give divorce dnt give. Let him file contested divorce. If he married again without divorce you can file case on him he may send to jail. For maintenance you can file crpc 125.

san   18 April 2016

Hi tamilinian,

1. Yes, i'm educated, Completed MCA.

2. I having 3 years of work experience before marriage. After marriage and still now i having a 2.8 years of career gap having.

3. Yes, i having all evidence.

4. I having an angry on him, by he avoid me and my baby by hearing their parents words. But still i love him.


Thanks in advance.

Please help me to provide your suggestions.


san   18 April 2016

Hi Ravi,

Sorry, i cant able to give my baby at any time.

For her only i not interested to think about divorce and another marriage life.

I having fear, her dad itself not interest to take care. How other guy comes and take care of my child. My child should not hurt by any one. she wants to be happy. That only my needs.


But now at 1.5 years itself, my child, family members, all worrying by seeing of my trouble and worries. Really i dont know what to do. I plan to ask maintenance only to disturb him, by the way of , he need to think to take care of wife and child

san   18 April 2016


Small imformation,

My husband not inform while he travel to Denmark for short term onsite. After return also he not make call. After 15 days of he return, i make call to him yesterday. He and his dad talking too much of bad words and they telling soon you will get divorce.

His dad telling that, i keeping a s*x with my dad and my brother kept my mom. Talking more rubish words.

Really i dont no, where it going to ends. In their family, nobody ready to think about my child future. Once my baby using mobile while playing, she send msg by pressing unmeaning message, For that my husband sending a message.. "Dont disturb me".. If i call, he not picking . for that also he sending a message "Dont disturb me again and again".


Whether there having any chance to change in counselling??

Or again he take we both and left in road, to fake court also ?? Because he did same in police station.(In station, he inform henceforth he take care me and baby, took to his parents house(Gobicheitpalyam). Keep one day, their parents fight too much. so left we both in road(Coimbatore) and went)


san   18 April 2016

Hi, I having one more main doubt. Whether there having any chance that to get my baby from me. Because, Myself happy by keeping that baby. Whether my husband try to get my baby? Whether there having any rights and law to give baby for him? Please let me know some details regarding this.

A walk alone (-)     18 April 2016

For maintenance you can file case crpc125. File rcr you can also file residential permission under DV.Go your husband home. Because it is your matrimonial house you are his wife if he dnt allow you to enter his house you can file DV. Remember one think just record all in video or audio when he not allowing you or do anything wrong with you. Save all SMS video all will help you in future.

san   20 April 2016


My husband is not in his native. He is in chennai at now, where he staying i dont know. their parents also taking very badly by comparing me with my father itself. I cant able to goto his house too at now. My husband send a message (If anybody come to my house i will beat in slipper) and his dad talk wrongly.

I consult with one lawyers and file a case to come and live with me. But i dont know, whether its work out in counselling or not. Moreover their parents also allow him or not, I doesnt know. Really i fully hurt more because of this issue. These situations spoiled my baby life also. Shall i know, how many counselling will give??

Did u have any idea, what are things may happen in and after counselling. Whether their any chance to rejoin or i need to change my mind?? He is very strong in to get divorce from me. Whether he having rights to get my baby? At any situation i cant able to give my baby at any time with anybody. I asking maintenance only to make him rejoin only by giving trouble financially. Not in money-mind. Without his money i take care of me and my baby this 1.6 years, still i can able to tacle. But he and his parents need to answer for my and baby life.

Please give me good suggestion.


Relationships are built by feelings of love and respect. Hoping that giving trouble by filing cases will build such feelings is utter stupidity. Nobody feels love for partner who creates troubles. Without reviving tender and softer feelings there is no chance of reunion. Don't live in illusions. By adding fuel to war it only becomes bigger, there is no end to the war and there is no winner. 

san   25 April 2016

Then what is the use of maintaining a law for reunion and counselling? To reduce and forgive all mistakes and live together by forgetting all pains and sorrows only know.

All doing mistake, but accepting mistakes and reforming by thinking of kids life is not an illusion, i think so. If he not change, and his parents not accept his change means. Then Its GOD decision, If law not punish them means also, GOD will punish them definitely at one day.

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