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Prakash   13 October 2015

Harrasment by wife

I have got married in the first week of June, 2015. The marriage was a christian marriage and it took place in Andhra Pradesh. On the first night itself my wife asked me two months of time for s*x and i agreed for that as there was no hurry and i thought whats the hurry as she is with me for entire life. I did not disclose this to anyone in family at that moment. After marriage and all rituals and reception (i.e, approx10 days) we returned to our home. I used to stay alone at my work place in Uttar Pradesh before marriage and after marriage i brought my wife to Uttar Pradesh.

The life was normal for a week or so and then my wife started requesting me to send her to her parents as her father is not well. But i somehow kept postponing the same. Just a day before completing one month to our marriage, My wife called me in office and asked me to rush home. When i reached home i found to my surprise that my wife was locking the door and my father in law with three other men outside my house. They handed over the keys and left the place. I was in shock and i messaged my wife expressing my feeling. She replied that as her father came suddenly and she already wanted to go, so she went. 

I was very angry at that time and i dint care to answer my wife's calls and messages for 2-3 days. And after that there were no calls and messages. 

After a month i emailed her regarding the issue and my wife replied with an allegation on me that i am impotent.

My wife and her parents also spread the message that i am impotent to all my relatives and known people in AP. I got my testerone test and semen anlysis test done at a reputed hospital in delhi and the results were normal.

 Around one and half months after she left she lodged a complaint in police cell in AP againt me and my family members for demand of dowry, physically beating her and also that i am impotent. On the basis of complaint i was called for family councelling in AP. I attended the same, where my wife complained only that i am impotent. But during counselling my wife and their relatiives opted for mutual divorce and a demand of 75 Lakhs from me.I am very sure that i am not impotent and opting for mutual divorce will be like accepting that i am impotent.Till now the FIR has not been registered. 

Please advice me on this case.  If i let the FIR to be registered on the basis of her complaint then it would be a 498A case, How should i prevent myself from getting arrested and how should i proceed further in this case.


 8 Replies

I walk alone (Asst Manager)     13 October 2015

Same incidents like mine.

Sorry to hear brother.

Hire a competent lawyer & get AB for you and your parents ASAP. It was always about money bro. It is better to move out of that wedlock when the question comes to potency/impotency, cuz there are no-more respect left in that marriage. No more understanding, no more love & sorry to tell you a truth, it may be that your wife married to you out of family pressure & she might have thought of being with someone else. You are not the dream man for her. So what else is kept in that marriage.

If you can negotiate with something lesser amount, (suitable of your capacity), use & pls get rid of her with MCD. else, let her prove your impotency. for which she will take the help of court and ask for another round of medical test at the local govt hospital. You've already gone thru the tests, so you know what you're. Hence need not to worry.

About the 498A, once the bail is granted, arrest can be avoided. Then, let the police complete its investigation and file the chargesheet, and let the case begin. I'm sure, there also you will be able to prove your innosence & once the same is proved, you can file a divorce on the grounds of cruelty (Basis : Alleging Impotent, Harrasment & Filing false 498A) & desertation.

Interim maintaince could be awared to her. Do not worry, if money is only the motive, then any which ways you have to pay. No other options(unfortunately) probably 20-30% of your net monthly take home. After that maintaince may be awared (after divorce) till she re-marries..

1 Like

Naveen Kumar   14 October 2015

Don't pay your hard earned penny. Fight the case prove them wrong.

Naveen Kumar   14 October 2015

Don't pay your hard earned penny. Fight the case prove them wrong.

Prasad (Systems Engineer)     14 October 2015

Prakash... do not waste time anymore.


She does not deserve to be your wife and you do not need to prove that you are potent.


Just take time, negotiate, pay money and get rid of her. Nobody looks into why divorce was given.


Just get divorce from her. Do not waste time.


If she was genuine woman she sould have handled this issue differently.


She is only money minded. She may be a woman who does not like to have s*x with a man.


Whatever be the reason.

Don't waste time. Just get out of the marriage with her by paying money to cure this marital cancer in your life.


SuperHero (Manager)     14 October 2015

Sorry Bro....May God give you strength and courage to handle the situation.

kunal   15 October 2015

Dear Prakash,


Sad to hear brother but no need to worry. Please follow


1) They will file the FIR for sure. 


2) Pay some money to ACP  before FIR  to remove the name of your parents and relatives apart from you.


3) Apply for AB, cost you Rs. 20-25k. Lawyer will ask you to pay Rs. 50k for notice bail and AB. Negotiate the amount. 


4) Sit Relax..


5) Case will go to court & court will send your case to mediation, again try to settle the case by negoting the amount under your financial grip. .Make sure when you go to Mediation centre , carry a hidden camera with you, Talk to your Wife alone and then talk to your FIL alone. Ask the questions from them about false allegations by using your Emotional weopon. Record all this and make sure they reveal the truth. 


1 Like

SuperHero (Manager)     15 October 2015

@ Prakash - Now what you need is Courage and Bravery. Please don't get dejected or degraded.

There are have been many Men and his families who has gone through similiar situation and was humiliated in Public and Private.

Kill the Fear or The Fear will Kill You.

Gather all the Courage you have, there are many stories in LCI and also in Internet. Go through them, collect evidences, make sure you understand the Law. How Law works and how things work.

Now you should be alert and never loose confidence. Also you should give words of courage to your Parents.

Also if you have are Frustrated/Stressed and Fed up for any reason, don't show it on others, especially your Family and Friends and just write in a paper or Learn some relaxation techniques, how to handle stress.

And This Too Shall Pass. For any Queries keep post it in LCI.

Also What Max can they do, Send you to Jail, You will come out by bail and you can fight the case. But as per Supreme Court Police can't arrest without any evidences.

Just drag the case and everything will come down. Time will teach a big lesson.

If you have sufficient funds(a reasonable amount) and they agree for MCD, better get rid of her. You will buy Mental Peace and Safety for your Family. 

Wishing You Good Luck.

1 Like

SuperHero (Manager)     15 October 2015

Actually you should file for Annulument not even MCD.

1 Like

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