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Guilty of 498a

Page no : 3

Adv k . mahesh (advocate)     23 April 2013

from all this i can explain that fault is at your end and blaming your wife , your father, mother how is it that they made you suffer

if your father has not shown you the right path in studies you cannot justify yourself what you should do and blame your father and coming to this forum and blaming your father as he did everything 

will you answer me one question who told you to beat a women if you are not a grown up how your hand has raised to beat a women (who came to you and stand behind you and told you are a papas son) on this you had fractured her right hand now your fear is being established at this forum 

blaming your father for everything wrong and telling that you had a psycological problem and you want to go back to your wife on fear of taking 498a 

every words you had established in this query is not justifieble and even if you go back to repent you marrige again i dont think you will be ......

1 Like

Alex (QS)     24 April 2013

randomethic.thank you. i know am at fault. but right now my request to even get psychological help is not being allowed. i am not able to stand up to my dad. i just dont know how to do it.

k mahesh thank you too for sparing your time. i beat my wife because i was told that is the way to bring a wife under control. i think i exceeded it. my brother used to beat his wife too. i assumed that was the way to do it.

nothing i said or did is right, i know now that i am reading lots of cases here and i realise that my world is different.

aakash i may have issues i may have reached out for help. you have no right to abuse me. thanks.

randomethic (Professional)     24 April 2013

Alex, one can always get inventive.

For eg. if you have friends, go out with them. Will your dad still come along?

If you have a job, open a new bank account in your name alone. 

Or, if you get an allowance, don't spend it all, use that to open an account in your name and start putting money in it.

Think, there is always a way.

NC (BM)     24 April 2013

Believe me I have tears in my eyes and a big time anger in heart for you. I avoid writing anything in anger so I am avoiding any hard words for your future life.

You have so much fear of your father, but not of god. Did you ever think that your father is not going to be there in your life for lifelong and some day or the other you have to start taking decisions for your life. Why not from now on?

On the other hand, your wife is simply a superb lady and you do not deserve her.

K.K.Ganguly (Advocate)     24 April 2013

1 Please do a favour to her Alex by not disturbing her any more,

2. She has suffered enough. No more please,

3. She deserves a decent life where your entry should not be allowed,

4. When she has not filed any complaint u/s 498A so far which she should have filed long back to teach you & your family a very good lesson or two, I do not think that she will dirty her mind by doing it now when she has got rid of you legally.

Krishnamohan (Consultatnt)     24 April 2013

Dear Alex,

You do not want to hurt your father, but you are also feeling sad that you left your wife on his words. Finally you are the person to decide for your self. People seem to use you for their needs. 

If you want to live life, Treat people around you the way you want to be treated your self. You cannot please all. You have to decide whom you want to live with. If you think your father has exploited you, you need to take a decision accordingly. As written by someone above, you have to take decisions in to your way, but not to hurt others. If you think that your wife was good  you should get her back. If you think you cannot make her happy again do not go for another marriage too.

Regarding the psychological counseling , they can help you as long as you are open to live different from now. They can remove the hurt feelings from you and reduce your burden. Human beings do comitt mistakes, but when they repeat, we are not human. If you are repenting for the past, change the way and communicate with the people involved to get the damage minimized if not completely reverse it. If you feel repentent, you need not feel low and remain like that. You need to get back to action in proper way gradually if not suddenly. The psychological counseling helps removing the guilt in you. If you always feel guilty and low, you cannot make the things go in right path in future. Finally only you can help your self and god supports you in your good intentions. 

 

Afterall, if you are repenting for the past deeds you have to go differently from now. Your father has done what "he felt" good for you- some of them helped you and some of them hurt you and your wife. If you cannot talk to or write to him directly about how you want to go ahead, you can use some close friends or trusted mediators. If he scolds you, and you cannot keep away from him, just keep silent. You need not argue with him or fight back. He will realize the things gradually that you want to go in a different way. Remaining silent with some dominating people will help. 

If you have good intentions, you can always go in the direction you want and things will help you gradually. You may not succeed in all aspects immedaitely, but you will see the difference and that will help you to proceed further. If you want to go ahead, you need clarity. In this type of situations, clarity cannot be expected for distant future. 

With my experience, I can say, you have to convey your apologies to your wife and in-laws immediately and whole heartedly. That will bring some peace to you and then you will start seeing the things with more clarity.  Dont be afraid of the cases and punishments. If you are supposed to get them you cannot stop them by not conveying your apologies. The punishment given by our inner self ( conscience) is the hardest we can get compared to any external person or court's punishment. 

Look ahead with good intentions, things will be okay and I wish you all the best !

Krishnamohan

Victim of Domestic Voilence (Service)     25 April 2013

Hello Mango, Do you have a copy of the judgement or the citation of the case when "Wife can file domestic violence case as well but that would not be effective as per one of the high court ruling which says that - a complaint under the DV Act against the husband of a woman can only be entertained when there are living together in a shared household at the time of filing of the complaint". I am stuck in a similar case where wife filed DV case after 8 months. Please advice.

Mango (Consultant)     26 April 2013

Victim of Domestic Voilence an @ Judgement attached. Incase, you want to download it directly from Bombay High Court site, judgement link is as follows -

 

https://bombayhighcourt.nic.in/generatenew.php?path=./data/criminal/2013/&fname=APL16011070313.pdf&smflag=N

 

My understanding is that your wife should be out of relationship for atleast 1 year before this judgement can be used. Have you got the wedding gift too i.e. 498a? Any more surprises i.e 406, 34?

 

Mango


 


Attached File : 92067348 apl16011070313.pdf downloaded: 40 times

Alex (QS)     16 May 2013

dear all. who helped me

right now i just want to update me that my wife has refused any kind of talk with me i tried through the counsellor. she said she is done with me.

she is waiting for the court order.

i have one question. our MCD is issued for order in a few weeks. it has been getting posponed as the judge was not available. now can one party withdraw a case that has been issued for order?

Thanks

Alex (QS)     16 May 2013

dear all. who helped me

right now i just want to update me that my wife has refused any kind of talk with me i tried through the counsellor. she said she is done with me.

she is waiting for the court order.

i have one question. our MCD is issued for order in a few weeks. it has been getting posponed as the judge was not available. now can one party withdraw a case that has been issued for order?

Thanks


(Guest)
Originally posted by : Alex

dear all. who helped me

right now i just want to update me that my wife has refused any kind of talk with me i tried through the counsellor. she said she is done with me.

she is waiting for the court order.

i have one question. our MCD is issued for order in a few weeks. it has been getting posponed as the judge was not available. now can one party withdraw a case that has been issued for order?

Thanks

 

If you have applied for divorce via MCD, then you will get it after the judge comes to the seat, now its vacation.  So wait coolly for some time


If you are worried abut divorce decree, same will be issued by the court after the order of divorce has been passed.

Alex (QS)     16 May 2013

helping hand - thanks for the prompt reply. i do realise that the judge will return soon and issue the order but is there a chance for me withdraw from this MCD that has been issued for order?

When i asked the counsellor he said that there is no more scope for argument and its gone for order


Thanks


(Guest)
Originally posted by : Alex

helping hand - thanks for the prompt reply. i do realise that the judge will return soon and issue the order but is there a chance for me withdraw from this MCD that has been issued for order?

When i asked the counsellor he said that there is no more scope for argument and its gone for order


Thanks


Correct me if I am wrong here.


Either you are nuts or this case has driven you nuts.


When you are just waiting for the divorce order to be passed, why the hell do you want to beat around the bush again and invite some more troubles for yourself?


You have gone via MCD, now you will get divorce that's all.


Just stay put.


(Guest)

Your wife has moved on-Leave her alone.

You caused enough stress now don`t cause more stress by withdrawing from Mutual Divorce.

She has enough ground to put you and oyur family in prison because of you breaking her hand.

Alex (QS)     16 May 2013

i wanted to know if i can stop my wife from walking away from me. she let me free and didnt punish me. but i want a chance. is there any legal way to stop an MCD


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