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Md Ibrahim (AM)     03 May 2011

Family problems

Dear Sir,

My Name is Md Ibrahim, working as AM in a reputed bank. Recently I got transferred to Hyderabad. I used to work at Adilabad, as my father expired recently; there is nobody else to look after my mother & sisters, so I got transferred to Hyderabad in December.

My parents solemnized my marriage on Nov 2009, with a girl residing at Adilabad. After marriage she too used to stay along with me at Adilabad. My parents used to stay at Hyderabad due to my sisters education. My in laws deceived me & my parents by providing wrong age of girl, which I came to know on marriage night. I did not disclose this matter in front of my parents. She did not establish physical relation with me, after my repeated counseling to her; she pleaded & said not to reveal anything to my or to their parents. Though I did not got any satisfaction with her in married life still I adjusted with her &wanted to maintain good relation till my death as this marriage was solemnized by my parents. 

One late night in November I received a call from my mother, that my father`s health is serious & I rushed to Hyderabad along with her in a car. After a week my father passed away. I & my mother used to stay in hospital along with my father. Before commencement of my father`s funeral rituals she left my home saying she would like to visit their parents for couple of days without seeking me / my mother`s permission and staying till date. She has been called on several occasions by me & my mother, still she did not turned up. I have sent a letter stating to come back by Register post also, and also stated that if any complaints regarding my behavior can keep in front counsel. After 1 month I started receiving calls from my In laws stating that I & my mother tortured her, never offered food and started threatening to me saying that they will lodge false complaint at Police station against me & my mother and even said they will kill me.

On day I called up my wife & their parents to meet at my residence for reunion. They called up my grandfather to their residence & said that I am impotent & they wanted me to stay away from my mother with my wife & also started threatening him that they will kill him & lodge complaint at WPS Begumpet.

I never had any intention to leave her, now at this situation what shall I do, kindly guide me. I can`t leave my mother & sisters in this position. There is nobody else except me to look after them.  It is my responsibility to take care of my mother & sisters & I have to do their marriages also.

I am scared if I call her where she will lodge complaint against me at Police station.

Kindly guide me.



Learning

 2 Replies


(Guest)

Dates are not adding up.Its not clear if there are medical issues interspersed with marital affairs ? Is there a suspicion of infertility or impotency ? There is a difference between the two. Infertile - not able to make children. Impotent - Unable to have s*xual intercourse. I am not a doctor but you could get this matter addressed separately thro doc to rule out issue at your end or her end. 

What is the chronology of event ? 

Nov 2009 - You got married.

Nov 2009- Father passed away, Wife abandons matrimonial residence without cause ?

......time passes..

.....

Dec 2010-You move to Hyderabad.

May 2011- You are scared of wife filing DV ?? Its not making sense.

Just to rule out medical issues, please get yourself checked for male infertility. If the result is positive, ie you are infertile / not impotent, then use that evidence to approach her and request that she get tested. If she is infertile, you could consult medics for medical management of the issue. 

 

.

.

Md Ibrahim (AM)     04 May 2011

married in november 2009, father`s death in nov 2010


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