I am working as an engineer. I got married in Dec 2009. It was a pure arranged marriage.
Our horoscope didn’t match; even then we were ready for marriage.
Before marriage my wife was working in Mumbai. We got engaged in June 2009. She has lot of friends (Boys are more than girls). She is an extrovert person. I have few friends, I am very choosy person. Before marriage we were talking on phone. Most of the time I was hearing new friends name from her. “Aaj uska phone aya tha, aaj usne ye kaha… etc etc.” After few months, I started feeling very insecure. The insecurity was increased day by day. Because of two, three incidents, I stared taking doubt. I had panic attacks. I couldn’t sleep at night. We were started fighting on this matter. I told this about her parents and my elder brother. Her parents said that, they cannot take backward action. They were confused. They said that, problem is in your attitude. My brother told that “you became very possessive about her. She has her personal life. You can not take doubt because of these events. Nobody came to you to say that she is characterless. So don’t think like that.” I tired to stop that kind of thinking. But whenever I tried to think on other matter, my mind came back to that point only. But I wasn’t sure, what I was thinking is true or just my misunderstanding. Between the time we got married. My insecurity increased. After marriage she was always on call. She was receiving sms at mid night also. I started to cross check her mobile. I got few doubtful information. But from that, I wasn’t able to prove anything against her. When I asked her some clarification. She got angry and told this to her parents. They called me and said that they will kill me if I will take doubt in future. Our daughter is an innocent girl. Her brother also called me and said that, he will give “Supari” to someone to kill me if I will repeat this thing.
I kept quiet thinking that I am thinking in wrong direction. Whenever any doubtful incident happens, I was telling my mind that, “it’s normal. You should think in other way. Think positively.” But one day I got roses in her notebook. I asked her, she told that these are from the bouquet which I had given to her before marriage. But the bouquet was also there in wardrobe as it is. I compared the roses, those were different. After this incident, I couldn’t tell my mind to think positively.
I went to psychiatrist. He said that I am not normal person. I have lots of prejudgments. He has done some psychiatry tests on we both. The report was that, I have a decease (I don’t know its name). That’s why I can’t understand her. He talked to us both. I had gone thru treatment for 8-9 months. But he didn’t believed that my wife also needs to change her behavior. He always wanted me to change. But I couldn’t change completely. Meantime, mentally I stared to hate her. Now, I am unable to open my heart couldn’t share anything with her. Uninterested to talk to her. Always trying to avoid her.
Now I am tired of doing adjustment. If I have a mental disorder, I am ready to accept it. I need divorce. I don’t want anything other than that. I am ready to give her my property. I will go to my native place; at least I can take care of my parents.
Is it possible to get divorce based on this mental disorder? What are the documents I need to submit? Do we need to stay apart for 1 year before applying for divorce?
At present my wife doesn’t know that I want divorce. Once I will ask her for that, her parents will definitely take some action. Please help me……