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Philip (senior Executive)     21 November 2012

To get rid off my wife who deserted me last year

Hallo All,
 
First of all thanks a lot for giving me an opportunity to contact you to bring this case in this forum..
 
Below I am furnishing my problem, could you please give me suggestion if you have time?
 
I am from a Bangalore based Telugu Christian family working as a Sr. Ex (contractual basis) in an MNC with a take home salary of RS. 32000/. We have a 3 stotried house in Bangalore constructed by my father in the name of my mother. We are very middle class family.
 
8 years back I got married to a Computer Engineer girl of Vizag through one of my cousins according to Chrstian Marriage Act in a Church in presence of all our relatives.
 
But from the very beginning she was influenced by her parents and used to act as per their instruction. She was a frequent visitor of Vizag and used to be there for 7/8 months in a year. After my father's death 5 years ago they became more adament. From their different conversation it was clear that her family wants to settle down in Bangalore in our house. Even after the birth of my son her frequnt visit to Vizag did not change. Our married life was going on in a sweet-sour way somehow. She was working in BIOCON here but never contributed any money to the family or even for our son.
 
On 28th Nov '11 when I was in the office and my mother being suffering from knee pain was sleeping she left our home (keeping the fron door open)with our son packing all hers and the baby's stuffs. When I came to know from my mother over fon her fon was switched off and in the meantime our home was theft and we lost some valuable items including gold ornaments. For next two days I could not tress her out and then on 30th Nov. my father in law informed me that she has reached Vizag.
 
This time our telerance level got over and by the help of a lawyer we send her a notice asking reason for leaving the house without any intimation as well as insecured. The reply notice came by blaming us torturing her and also with a false dowry allegation. We have replied the notice and offered her to come back stating that I shall take a separate house.
 
But she has never turned up. in this last eleven months sometimes she calls up and ask to talk to my son. Last sunday she called up and started talking nonsence by doubting me being with some other woman. I lost my temper and shouted at her. then her father called up and said "it seems my daughter is no more interested to stay with you. You give her a part of your property and she will give you divorce". I have shouted at him also.
 
They are quite influntial family and deputed police at my home in the midnite to look for me. But I was out of station and they have harrased my 65yrs old mother.
 
Now, on 12th Nov '12 she has come back to our house saying sorry. But I have no more soft corner for her. the last one year I had a horrible life and now have more or less settled. I feel irritated by seeing her. If I allow her to live in my house and I go and stay separate somewhere peacefully, is that an offence? Can she again bring any harrassment case against me? I want to get rid from her.
 
I want to divorce her.
In this situation I am biassed what to do and also no more interested to stay with her. I want to start a new life. But am ready to share the responsibility of our son.
 
Please advise me what to do.
 
Thanks a lot in advance,
 
with warm personal regards,
 
Philip
9739269888
 


Learning

 9 Replies

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     21 November 2012

1. Any Police report filed for that theft whose incidence you are mentioning here first of all?
2. See post Notice read with post sour-sweet yes or no hide and seek if she is staying with you then options for divorce gets limited. I don’t mean here that you cannot take divorce but you have to collect evidences of mental cruelties now and living under same roof divorce as per grounds available can be opted and it is not necessary that such Christian marriage Act couple needs to live separately to file for divorce !
3. As far as living separate is concerned you may tell her in-directly with some justification why you want to take her out of the mother’s property and live separately. It is tricky call which you need to devise ways to means yourself.

Also other than eye on mother's name property if she is not complaining much in daily life and is working lady then pull the so called dead marriage without touching Courts with bar of living under same roof which is slightly tricky to remove her from at this stage all of a sudden. This way you can live under same roof without talking terms yet take care of the son and need not have to spend another long decade in litigations unless she agrees for MCD as per your personal laws. 

vijay (M)     21 November 2012

@ Tajobs

 

if she is staying with you then options for divorce gets limited.

 

Does that mean if she is not staying with the husband, divorce would be easier ??

Philip (senior Executive)     21 November 2012

Dear Sir,

 

Thank you very much for your answers.

1. We have filed a complain that she left the home without intimation.

2. For last one year I have got mental torture by the legal notoce, by cops coming home, by curiosity of neighbours and relatives, etc. I have not even 0.1% interested to stay with her any more. I am fine alone.

3. When I see her I feel irritated and like to hit her but control myself. I cant live with her under the same roof.

4. Can I go out of my house and stay separate somewhere else? Because if I ask her to go back it will be an offence.

5. I can take financial care of my son. He is only 4 years.

6. Why to pull a dead marriage whole life? I can divorce her and mary again and have a normal life.

Now I dont feel like returning home after office, I come very early to office to avoid her. My mother & sister  is also not happy of her return.

Philip (senior Executive)     21 November 2012

I am now forced to stay with her under the same roof without any verbal/physical relation.

Since most of the laws are for ladies so I have to stay without my will. My life has become miserable for last 10days and I feel like commiting suicide.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     21 November 2012

@ Vijay

[He he……] not necessarily re-read the reply in conjecture and it all boils down reading his brief that he has as per me currently have limited grounds other than if bolt out of sky makes her agree to end marriage in cordiality.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     21 November 2012

@ Philip,

1.
Then hire an advocate via reference as per your personal law and discuss these issues and remedy thereof suggested and do the needful as reviving 'dead marriages' itself is cruelty.

2. For other questions it is my view as not advisable in present format of matrimonial laws to create self evidences of desertions etc. whose details (more) in person you will come to know once you locally consult as in Chamber with an Advocate.

[Last reply]

 

ANAMIKA VICHARE (LAWYER)     25 November 2012

One can file divorce petn even fi the partes are under one roof without cohabitation, cohabitation means staying together having physical relations

anamika_vichare@rediffmail.com

rajiv_lodha (zz)     25 November 2012

But getting such contested divorce as explained the situaltion above is next to impossible.

Kennedy Ron (Palyer)     29 November 2013

Knee pain really becomes severe if not cured in time. I was also having Patellar Tendonitis. I went to doctor they suggested me few yoga and stretching exercises, that really worked. These non surgical treatments are everlasting as well

 


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