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Ashish (MANAGER)     11 July 2014

Should i file divorcee..pls advise

Hello experts this is ashish here..my wife left her matrimonial home on 3rd Jan 2014 after which even after mutiple attempts she is not returing back to her matrimonail home. We also have a 15months old child which she has taken along with her.

Her main issue is that she wants me to leave my job and parents and settle seprately at Nagpur which I rejected. After which her mother and brother became extremely abusive and on multiple occassion threatned me and myaged  parents 

Finally I lost my patience and i lodged NC against her mother and her brother at local police station u/s 504, 505, 506 and 507..this was sometime in the month of March 2014

Finally I also sent her RCR notice sometime in mid april through my lawyer and told her to come back but after a month a half she replied to my notice and made baseless and false allegation regarding dowry and domestic violence for which I replied to her notice sometime in mid may telling her that all allegations are baseless and I asked her to striclty prove the allegations.

Friends this is the first time she has made this allegations post my 1st notice which my lawyer clearly said that its an afterthought and false allegations were levelled for first time. Before that she has never made any police complaint and any allegations against me and my parents

Friends my question is I sending the RCR first, my complaints for threats against her family were filed first do I stand a good chance of getting a divorce. is the case heavily in my favor

I my 2nd reply notice I have told her to return within 15 days with baby boy till date she has not returned nor she has replied to my reply notice.

Guys is my case a fit case of divorce, can i go ahead and file petion in court for divorce since I am emotionally and mentally drained bcoz of all these things due to which its also affecting my professional life (lost a promotion due to this issues)

Guys pls advise,

Thanks,

Ashish



Learning

 21 Replies

ADV-JEEVAN PATIL, MUMBAI ( DEEMED/CONVEYANCE OF BUILDING)     11 July 2014

Pl write brief & precise Q. Make it brief. N send

ADV-JEEVAN PATIL, MUMBAI ( DEEMED/CONVEYANCE OF BUILDING)     11 July 2014

Pl write brief & precise Q. Make it brief. N send

IKGoyal Advocate (Legal)     12 July 2014

Pl settle amicably. First of all, file application under S. 9 of Hindu Marriage Act. Restitution of Conjugal Rights. Matrimonial disputes are very sensitive in nature. Be careful in handling a wife. Hope for the Best.

(Guest)
Originally posted by : Ashish

Hello experts this is ashish here..my wife left her matrimonial home on 3rd Jan 2014 after which even after mutiple attempts she is not returing back to her matrimonail home. We also have a 15months old child which she has taken along with her.

Her main issue is that she wants me to leave my job and parents and settle seprately at Nagpur which I rejected. After which her mother and brother became extremely abusive and on multiple occassion threatned me and myaged  parents 

Finally I lost my patience and i lodged NC against her mother and her brother at local police station u/s 504, 505, 506 and 507..this was sometime in the month of March 2014

Finally I also sent her RCR notice sometime in mid april through my lawyer and told her to come back but after a month a half she replied to my notice and made baseless and false allegation regarding dowry and domestic violence for which I replied to her notice sometime in mid may telling her that all allegations are baseless and I asked her to striclty prove the allegations.

Friends this is the first time she has made this allegations post my 1st notice which my lawyer clearly said that its an afterthought and false allegations were levelled for first time. Before that she has never made any police complaint and any allegations against me and my parents

Friends my question is I sending the RCR first, my complaints for threats against her family were filed first do I stand a good chance of getting a divorce. is the case heavily in my favor

I my 2nd reply notice I have told her to return within 15 days with baby boy till date she has not returned nor she has replied to my reply notice.

Guys is my case a fit case of divorce, can i go ahead and file petion in court for divorce since I am emotionally and mentally drained bcoz of all these things due to which its also affecting my professional life (lost a promotion due to this issues)

Guys pls advise,

Thanks,

Ashish

Two options:

1.  Take her back, accept her the way she is.

2.  Forget her, forget the kid, file for divorce.


As I told you above, start taking responsibility for your actions, and once you take any decision, stick to it, come what may.


All the best.

Adv.Vandana Vaidya (Advocate & Regd. Patent Attorney)     12 July 2014

Well, since you have initiated the action first, both criminal as well as civil, surely it will have an positive effect. However, that will not reduce the litigation process or time to settle the matter. Court gives ample time and chance for the other party to submit his version and to conduct his case too. You have done a blunder by filing a criminal complaint against her parents, now, there is hardly any chance of reconciliation. Advice you to file a petition for custody of your son, with this there are ample chances that your wife’s will come forward for an amicable settlement.

Suneet Gupta (www.vashiadvocates.com)     12 July 2014

Please take the suggestion of IK Goyal ji. File a petition for Restitution of Conjugal Rights under Sec 9 of the Hindu Marriage Act. If your wife refuses then you can file for Divorce citing desertion as the cause.

However, it is better to solve the issues amicably rather than through courts. Talk to her calmly and tell her the possible future course of action - either she can come back and stay amicably with you or both of you can get divorce by mutual consent.

Please also try to understand why she wants to leave your parents and whether she is believes that she is facing any mental harassment  from their side. Many a time small avoidable misunderstandings with the in-laws can lead to broken homes and harm the children.

Just as you have a responsibility towards your parents, you have a responsibility towards your child who you brought into this world voluntarily and who is totally dependent on you. Let not the past negatively impact the development of the future.

Vishal Kashyap (Self Employed)     13 July 2014

Whatever you do just keep in mind you have already initiated criminal proceedings. Courts are always in favour of women whatever the case be in matrimonial dispute. File section 9. Let her defend or counter. Thn decide. Take help of social or other relatives who can play role of a good mediator. You will get nothing if you file divorse at this stage. Most important is kid. He is innocent n needs both. But situation matters. Still first priority reunion.

Dr Vipan B Kumar (Advocate)     13 July 2014

wait for a year................then you can file for divorce................

Ashish (MANAGER)     13 July 2014

Thanks experts for all the advice but unfortunately this lady which means my wife is not willing to listen to me, Just yesterday night I tried speaking to her again and told her very clearly lets not fight and see the good will and welfare of our child..on which she has put certain conditions

1) I need to withdraw all the allegations against her and her family which I have made in my notice

2) I have to give her in writing for which she is saying that contents will be decided by her lawyer as per her she will not give me any written assurance

experts do you feel that its worth, first of all she left the matrimonial home on her own will without any reason and then I kept calling her like a fool now that criminal procedding are iniated she and her mother have completely lost the plot

friends if i give her in writing and if she does anything wrong in future it will be complete devestation, she wants to have the remote control in her hand

Friends this lady just married me bcoz she wanted to acquire my property, sometimes i do feel that her parents against her wish have pressurised her to marry me and bear a child so that she can acquire the wealth and extract monthly maintenance whereas on the other hand she can keep enjoying and live life as she wants.

Guys pls advise now that reconcillation is not possible despite making repeated attempts fortunately I have recorded the last conversation..can this be a fit case for divorcce and getting the custody of my child.Pls advise

Thanks,

Ashish

Suneet Gupta (www.vashiadvocates.com)     13 July 2014

Dear Ashish,

As per your last post, reconciliation is not feasible. Therefore the best option is to file a petition for Restitution of Conjugal Rights. If she refuses, then you can easily convert it into a Divorce Petition. Keep all evidence, e.g. telephone recordings safely and produce them before the court.

Thanks,
Suneet

gautam (not disclosed)     13 July 2014

when cases are filed, then the relationship is never the same as before.

One has to think 10 times before involving law,

Now what if she accepts RCR and enters your life to comply with the law, will you be able to accept her and are you ready to accept and continue the relationship, if yes then follow the route, the only advantage with this route is if she refuses you will easily get divorce without paying huge alimony

but if she comes and starts creating further problems in your life, then your life will be spoilt.

Sandeep Naik (Advocate)     13 July 2014

Among the above advocates , the advice given by the Hon'ble Adv. Suneet Goyal is the best. It is human psychology that once the suspicion is created (in ur case, it is from both side ) it will be continue for the remote period unless some satisfactory solution is there. 

Unfortunately, the above advocates as well as myself have not seen the other side. We are giving our suggestions on the basis of ur statements. U have created unnecessary doubt that ur wife has married for the sake of ur wealth. No woman will ever want to destroy her marital life after the delivery of child. Had it been so , u must have sensed her greed even before she became pregnant. There must have been some disputes between ur parents and her. Assuming that ur parents were right, having become father, u should be more balanced person. 

Anyway, lot of waters have  been flown  and u have gone much ahead , it will be difficult for ur ego to stop or come back from the situation. Divorce is not the solution . You will be spoiling the life of three people along with the curse of the parents and the relatives of both of u. Let the sand settle down. there is no harm in accepting the conditions. Afterall, it is not Indo-Pak  treaty. Ur wife will forgive u looking the future of ur child. Very difficult but not impossible . Best Luck. 

Adv. Sandeep Naik (Mob : 99 670 56980 )

Bombay High Court

Ashish (MANAGER)     13 July 2014

Thanks experts.. the advice given by you all was very helpful. On the basis of advise given by Sandeep Naik and Suneet Gupta I will file petition for Reinstution of Conjugal Right and ask her to come back since bcoz if i file divorce I am not going to get it since most of our laws are biased against men. I have to prove to judge that I am willing to continue the matrimonial ties but deep in my heart I really hate this lady and I am sure even she thinks the same for me. 

I am also very much sure that she is not going to come back to her matrimonial home since she doesn't have any face left after making all the false allegations against  me and my family. But still have to prove to judge. 

Experts just one last advise if i file Reinstution of conjugal rights petition in how much time i expect to get the resolution? And suppose if she is willing to come back can I get a written assurance from her that in future she will not file any false allegations against me and my family. what should i do to protect my and my parents interest..your advise will surely help in planning my further course of action.

thanks for your advise

wishes and regards,

ashish kelkar

gautam (not disclosed)     13 July 2014

wish you all the best ashish


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