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Parental intrusion ruining couples' marital life: Delhi high


Parental intrusion ruining couples' marital life: Delhi high court


NEW DELHI: The interference of parents in the married life of their daughters has become a major cause for playing havoc with the lives of young couples post marriage, the Delhi high court has said.


Expressing concern over rift between couples due to parents' persistent interference in their daughter's married life, Justice Kailash Gambhir upheld a lower court's decree of divorce to a man on the ground of his in-laws' frequent interference in his marital life.


Justice Gambhir said parents should draw a line to let their daughters lead happy married lives.


"All parents guide, teach and discipline their daughters and are concerned about their welfare after marriage but it is imperative for parents to draw a line as the prime concern should be that their daughter is happily settled in a new atmosphere at the husband's place," he said.


But, it should not mean day-to-day monitoring of the affairs taking place at the matrimonial home of the daughter, he said.


Parents should not become uninvited judges of problems of their daughter, become an obstacle in the daughter's married life, plant thoughts in her mind and gain control over her and promote disharmony in her family life, the judge said.


"They are expected to advise, support and believe in their upbringing maintaining a discreet silence about the affairs of the matrimonial relationship," the court said.


"The present case is an unfortunate example where the parents of the appellant, instead of putting out the fire have fuelled and fanned it," the court said, dismissing an appeal filed by the wife challenging the lower court's order granting the man decree of divorce.


According to the husband, the difference with his wife started a few months after their marriage in 1990 due to frequent interference of his in-laws.


He alleged that he was even hit publicly by his father-in law two years after his marriage.


Seeking decree of divorce, he had approached the court, which allowed his plea on the grounds of cruelty by his wife due to continuous interference by his in-laws.


So, Unwanted intrusion  into their children's married life create a lot of problems leading to divorce.





 15 Replies

Roshni B.. (For justice and dignity)     20 February 2011

This may be more true in metros.


However if you travel  across the length and breadth of India,you'll discover that daughter's parents are usually more docile and submissive.


They spend so much money on her marriage that they always take many precautions post marriage,so that marriage doesn't break.Because it means their financial loss also,as most dowry articles/streedhan/marriage expenses are not returned owing to lack of proofs.



yes...after marriage no body, may be they are wife's parentas or husbands parents  should interfere in their children' life unless they are asked to do so.

Rahul (VC)     20 February 2011

Can someone help with a copy of this judgement or citation of relevant sections

Rahul (VC)     20 February 2011

Also, could the husband in this case have taken any legal action against his in laws for over interference in his married life as being the primary cause of disharmony?

randomethic (Professional)     21 February 2011

What about the husband's parents who can also equally cause the marriage to break down by undue interference?

3 Like

Roshni B.. (For justice and dignity)     21 February 2011

Strangely there are no such news where role of husband's parents have been highlighted in breaking of a marriages,even though it's the a common problem mostly in India.

One set of family interefered in daughter's life,and this became news!!!




husbands parents think, it is their right!

1 Like

randomethic (Professional)     21 February 2011

Why is our society designed to take away and replace everything a woman knows before she gets married but no such rules apply to men? Why do I have a feeling that it was a man that made these decisions!

Ohh, and I don't think the husbands mind their parents interfering in their married life...would they file a case against their own parents if they were the cause of the marriage breaking up?

2 Like

randomethic (Professional)     21 February 2011

Why is our society designed to take away and replace everything a woman knows before she gets married but no such rules apply to men? Why do I have a feeling that it was a man that made these decisions!

Ohh, and I don't think the husbands mind their parents interfering in their married life...would they file a case against their own parents if they were the cause of the marriage breaking up?

1 Like


Dear Randothemic,


Gone are the days when a "man" wanted to "rule a woman".


Nowadays,the husband's mums make them dance to their tunes,which husbands do willingly,cowardly,unwillingly or whatever you call.


As they fear being branded as a "joru ka gulam" by their mums which hurts their egos,they are happier if called a "mamas's boy".That's not so degrading.


These women even make father inlaws dance to their tunes.The present generation of father inlaws whose sons were born in 70s or 80s don't harass their wives,which they must have done in their youth when their Goddess mums were alive.After a few years,when their mums died and only wife survives,they start dancing to their tunes,and become a non-supportive FIL to their present generation bahus.

If you read all threads in family forum,you will hardly come across any thread where a girl complains that her father inlaw bullies her while her mum inlaw is too afraid of father inlaw,to revolt against him....It doesn't happen any more,as it did in India 50 or 100 yrs. back.

Today's married men learn ways to toture their wives from their mums;not dads

It's their mums and other women in the family who will take more interest in dowry than the menfolk,it's the females who taunt the bahu if she can't conceive,thereby turning the son against the wife,even if he is willing to adopt a child.

It's their mums who are more possessive about the sons than their dads,which makes them torture the bahus in jealousy.Lucky are those women whose mother inlaws were not alive during their marriage  :)

Dealing with a dad-in-law is much easier,if he has no other females to poison his mind.


Father inlaws usually harass the daughter inlaw when provoked by their wives.Else they are usually busy in other activities like newspaper and TV if they have retired,else in their offices.

It's high time we accept that nowadays,women are each others' biggest enemies;not the men anymore,unless provked by the females to harass their wives or bahu.

randomethic (Professional)     21 February 2011

That is partly true and partly not so, Meenal.


My FIL has been nasty to my MIL and so now, I can clearly see the pati wanting to follow in his footsteps. Also, MIL has played a nice role (like you mention above) by accepting all of FILs behavior towards her so now pati thinks it is ok to behave the way he does because it is the wife's duty to accept it, just like his mother did. Ofcourse, all our problems arise because MIL thinks I am nothing more than a child bearing machine and pati thinks I am nothing more than a puppet he has the right to control and abuse.


Why he did not marry his mother, I do not know. Honestly, I feel at times that man really have a HUGE mommy complex in our country. They want the wife to be exactly like mommy but (with all due respect to their mothers) still be given their physical rights to the wife.


Wives are a mommy replacement. One thing they forget ofcourse, is that their wife will treat her/their children the way that mommy treated them....but the pati can only get ma style pyaar from his own mother...Why try to eradicate the wives' parents from her life when they cannot do without mommy for even a second? More importantly, why ask a woman to do away with the people who have brought her up with the same love and care that the guy's parents do...(the people who have also grown old by the way - I find it most amusing when the guys on this board refer to their own parents as being old and invalid or incapable of taking care of themseleves but do not even consider for a moment that the same is applicable to the wife's parents as well) when clearly, guys themselves are utterly incapable of doing so and are often as they exhibit, distraught and consider it cruel on the wife's part if she asks that the guy also not have as close a relationship with his parents as he now wants to deny her.

1 Like

Sanket Sharma (AM)     21 February 2011

In India there are many cases, where girls family has broken their own daughers family life for tiny issue by missusing laws, money, influence and using police. Guys family is not less then that. IT IS TOURTURE TO A HUSBAND, He cant leave either parents and wife, I feel it is a biggest problem most of the men facing in India, end of the day one beautifull young family will closes the show

Sunil Patil (Engg)     05 September 2012

Hello everyone,


Can someone kindly give a copy of this judgement?




thanks legal advise for such an informative article ........it looks like lots of legal terrorist women felt offended by this which is cool :)  ....... and a piece of advise of such women > itna mat jalo ki apna hi ghar phoonk do ..just try being genuine , it works !

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