honey (manager) 27 June 2010

Divorce-Wife not agreeing

Hi,

I have been married for over 3.5 years now. there have been a lot of compatibility issues with my wife since we got married.There has been a lot of involvement from her family as well. When things were not working out, She left for USA for a year (After a years of marraige). She came back after that, but things continue to be the same. She tried committing suicide once.HOwever, things were brought under control. We have visited doctors i.e. family consultants, undergone a few tests etc. At the end of teh sessions, doctors have said that we both are too different people and will be very difficult to continue. My health also took a bad trun and I was under weekly injecctions for 3 months.

I have requested my wife to seperate , and asked her for divorce by mutual consent. However she does not agree and se has been staying in our house. She and her family are threatning us for harrasment and dowry charges which are not true. Infact we never asked her to leave our house. I keep going to diffeernt countries because of my work for very short durations. I filed a police complaint about false charges and warned them of the suicide tactics mywife is using. The police visited our house and asked her if we have harrased her / she has any problems. if she has any problems they asked her to leave the house and go to her parents house. However she denied of any problems.she has said to me that she wouldnt give divorce andwould go to other country. She says she does not want the mark of divorce.

I now wish to file for divorce. How can i do so under hindu marraige act? This is getting too much for us to bear and i do not wish to continue. I want to move on with my life without the daily tension.

please help.

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6 Replies

(Guest)

Some thoughts

It seems from this brief that basically her "physical presence" brings in differences of temparament in-between the couple. Otherwise the way you have expressed your briefs it does not sounds that there may be any other major issues when she or you are out of country means not face to face company.

Solutions:

1. Financially secure her and politely split residence and still lead a "married life". Means offer her to be put in a equal status nuleus residence close by to present matrimonial home and assure her of regular visit to each others homes. The hiccup assumed here is resistence by her and her family on account of "society" so tell them to give solution to daily brikerings ! Sometime in relationship by providing exptended "space" to couples brings in closeness who knows. It is worth a try since she does not want "divorcee" status symbol and you are pressurising her for divorce wherein she is not giving into her "social" in-securities.

In above sugestion friendship and trust plays a very important role and see if this works otherwise when a husband asks for divorce it is impossible to get one unless some extra ordinary 'evidences" are in place or wait for new propsoed Marriage Law (Amendment) Bill 2010 become an Act.

All the best

Rgds.

(Guest)

solution 2 :-))))))

“Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation .” - Kahlil Gibran

Amen...............

Devajyoti Barman (Advocate) 27 June 2010

For expeditious and smooth divorce you have to file a suit for mutual divorce. If that does not happen then you have the option of filing the suit for divorce on the ground of mental cruelty and desertion whci may be contested by your wife in which eventuality it will take some time to get to the final judgement.

honey (manager) 27 June 2010

Re Arun: thanks for the replies. After so many years of trying, I do not wish to continue this relationship further for the sake of society.I want to get out of this relationship and get back to normal life and start again. Eventually, I like any other common person would want tosettle down with someone I can share my life in a much better way,

Re Devajyoti : Thanks for the reply. Is there any timelimit for such cases or are they indefinite?

Would court have the power (Afer presenting various proof's from councelling etc) to compel us to live togehter?

(Guest)

1. It is not that easy to get out of a relationship till Mariage (Amendment) Bill 2010 becomes an Act and most of us here have not even read the draft Bill which is before Legislature wing of Parliament and it is just a speculative thoughtthat many a couples just like your situation can sigh a breadther if it pops out practically. But then there are too many kisses between cup and lips as wise people say so wait till then and try to accommodate incompatibility till then.

2. Oh, when you say "help of a common person" in your reply you mean bartering? Indirectly you want a common person to marry HER and in turn you escape and start leading a normal life ! Is this what you mean if so then who wants to become a scapgoat (raise yoru hands here) start thinking inwards !

3. Sh. Barman's advise is quite practical. Straight forward (contested I mean here) divorce suits average shelf life is 25 to 35 months (and you never know if any hiccups she or her family may throw into it) . A MCD shelf life with all Agreement in place is 6 months to 18 months. Think now how to bell a cat ! There are excellent memebers in LCI database whose services you may take to proceed further on any of the above chance.

Rgds.