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AryaVrat (Executive)     31 August 2014

Templemarriage, not registered. not living together

I was in a relationship with a girl, I had formally communicated to her before starting relationship that my parents will not agree to marriage and I cannot enter into a relationship. She insisted that in any case She is looking for marriage in her caste, it doesn't matter and she wont cause an issue. She did so for a year, looked some guys, some places her marriage was fixed and broke up. Then she started harassing me to marry. I refused as she has promised me not to harass, she did a lot of blackmailing and offered to commit suicide. Due to fear and good will that a girl life will be gone cos of my actions, even though, I was clear from beginning - I was forced to marry in these conditions to her in a temple marriage. The marriage had some vows but didn't look like typical marriage. Some of the vows like prasada given after marriage wasn't consumed to. All in all it was just for pics that rounds and magalsutra was clicked. There was no one present from my family relatives, friends and only her friends were present. Neither her family or my family were informed of the same. After forcing me on moral grounds to marry even though she was searching for grooms for over an year - the marraige happened and now the scenario is that I am harassed over small things. Like not to talk to female friends, share accounts of my personal id for monitoring, share my phone for checking and when I refuse to do so[I assure you that I am not wrong ]. The marriage wasn't accepeted by her family too as she had intimated that her family wouldn't have an issue but they desserted her. From the day of marriage - we haven't live together and live separately though interact and share a troubled relation where I am constantly harassed. The law has given so much powers to women that She is misusing some of them to harass me and I for the fear of she not committing suicide or doing something wrong to heard my parents or cause them public insult some how have been on the victim side. I have just completed 4 months of misery and understand for applying for a divorce even though marriage is not registered - an year needs to be completed.
1. Since from marriage day itself we are living separately does the duration of asking divorce which should be atleast 1 year of living separately count?
2. If I plan to take divorce by mutual consent[which is a rare case] - what needs to be done and do I have to go to court or lawyers can do it on my behalf since being a non-localite I fear her attitude and also her presently unhappy family?
3. If she doesn't agree to divorce by mutual consent - does my case come under legal divorce clauses. If so what proof needs to be submitted.
4. Isn't harssment too a crime?

Please reply as I am undergoing depression and if this continues will end my life as it's taking toll onmmy life.

I will appreciate any person advising correctly so that in coming months I can take legal route.

NOTE: We are co workers so she creates a ruckus at workspace and i fear loosing my job and loss of respect.



Learning

 4 Replies

Arpit Sharma (Advocate)     31 August 2014

Dear Aryavat

The situation of yours is most common these days and in scene of your marriage you text above that photos, mangalsutar are sufficient proof of your marriage. The only possibility to get ride of the problem to knock the door of court with evidence to proof your point strongly.

 

ans 1. Court look for the reason of living separately

ans 2. Divorce through mutual consent can be done procedural way of law and your presence is mandatory & advocate is mandatory.

ans 3. yes, your case under the legal process of court

ans 4. Yes it is harassment but for proving harassment you should come forward of proof like messages, phone call, forcing you to do marriage in presence of someone etc.

My suggestion as an adv. that you should approach an  Advocate to free from all your problem instead of following the process of your own mind because process of law is entirely different from what you think.

Adv. Arpit Sharma

Contact No. +91-8826383284

place: New Delhi 

Arpit Sharma (Advocate)     31 August 2014

Dear Aryavat

The situation of yours is most common these days and in scene of your marriage you text above that photos, mangalsutar are sufficient proof of your marriage. The only possibility to get ride of the problem to knock the door of court with evidence to proof your point strongly.

 

ans 1. Court look for the reason of living separately

ans 2. Divorce through mutual consent can be done procedural way of law and your presence is mandatory & advocate is mandatory.

ans 3. yes, your case under the legal process of court

ans 4. Yes it is harassment but for proving harassment you should come forward of proof like messages, phone call, forcing you to do marriage in presence of someone etc.

My suggestion as an adv. that you should approach an  Advocate to free from all your problem instead of following the process of your own mind because process of law is entirely different from what you think.

Adv. Arpit Sharma

Contact No. +91-8826383284

place: New Delhi 

Laxmi Kant Joshi (Advocate )     31 August 2014

Aryavrat , photos of marriage , exchange of garland , saptapadi , mangalsutra all these confirms your marriage ,talk to her and get her ready for mcd and apply jointly for mcd in the family court , if she will not ready for mcd then file contested divorce in the family court on the ground of mental cruelty as 1. she had not joined you evenafter one year of marriage, 2. still marriage is not consummated 3. she threaten you to commit suicide 4. not allow you to talk female colleagues etc ....these all comes under mental cruelty, gather the relevant proof and knock the door of the court with the help of your advocate and file the case .

AryaVrat (Executive)     31 August 2014

Thanks Arpit and Laxmi Sir

 

Laxmi Sir OR Anyone from learned friends here- On some of your points, kindly provide direction:-

 

a. we have not completed one year of separation. We married 6 months ago and we have been living separately. She comes at my place once in a while but I didn't want to live with her as the mariage was a forced marriage on basis of emotional blackmail, duress and suicide blackmails. For some reason I mentioned her that we should wait till registartion of marriage and she agreed.

b. If by marriage is consummated - you mean a cohabitation or a physical relation - as i stated that she was already into that with me and looking for grooms for her marriage and assured me that she won't blackmail me later. So I dont know if it applies to me. however after marriage I managed her to admit on her mails, calls, voice recordings that she had done all this.

 

c. Yes regarding the suicide point, I have two or three calls recordings where a month ago she admitted to constatntlydoing this.

 

d. Regarding the fourth point - she fights over checking my cell, bashes my character by liking me with my ex  gf's of 5 or 6 years ago - though i have no contact with them for years and they are married. So i dont give her cell phone cos seeing her nature she would start abusing me for femail colleagues and friends too. I have voice recordings, chats where she has admitted to saying so.

 

e. She has also offered to leave me by december and asked me to take a decision about our future. I can do it now but the point is she is my fellow colleague a senior[also in age by 5 years]. One or two days its fine but she starts the emotional blackmail or abusing after that so I want to aviod it and hire a lawyer once i am out of job from this office. I am putting my papers soon.

 

f. If she agrees for mutual - will it be an idea without going for MCD if we settle this among ourselves by delting all pics mutually and issuing a video that we both have agreed to do so and in future  no one will claim to harass each other. Will that video act as a proof if after hiding a marriafe which is just legal cos of pics and not actally a normal marriage suffice?


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