Criminal Trident Pack: IPC, CrPC and IEA by Sr. Adv. G.S Shukla and Adv. Raghav Arora
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sudherson (DESIGN)     24 October 2014

Need help - mentally abused by her father and her brother

Hi Friends,

I got married this year on may 5th 2014. since 6th may onwards iam and my family facing problems from her parents and her brother. They called by phone and speaking wrong world to me and my family. i with my wife only 10 days.now i am not living with my wife.She is at her fathers relative place. She want to live with me or she doesnt want to give divorce to me .I would like to know when can i apply for divorce and what would happen if my wife refuses to give me divorce.



Learning

 10 Replies

Adv. Chandrasekhar (Advocate)     24 October 2014

One year after the marriage you can file divorce petition.  If there is no wrong on her part, you will not get divorce.  Father-in-law and Brother-in-law's bad behaviour is not a ground for divorce.  If you are offended by their action, consult a local advocate and file appropriate cases against them.  As your wife is innocent, you cannot get away from her. If you want her back  and her father and brother forcefully kept her in their home, then file Restitution of Conjugal Rights case, so that she can come back to you.

1 Like

Prasad (Systems Engineer)     24 October 2014

Hi Sudherson,

You may be the 1001th man who might be going through the same painful experience today right now in India.

You are not alone and such cunning woman and family are on the rise.

They think that all men are bad.

Hence they want to behave rudely from day one, with the help of gender biased laws and police.

They want to enslave you by creating fear in you and separating you from your parents.

Try to stay calm and get ready to handle this situation in the right way.

Here is my suggestion based on my personal and experience of many others in this forum.

This is the psychological mental game that the girl and her family is playing on you.

Your wife is not innocent here. She is party to what her father and brother are doing.

If your wife is innocent, she can easily advise her brother and father to stay out of her peaceful life with you.

Start recording the conversations and create proof for the atrocity and cruelty of your father-in-law and brother-in-law.

Then go boldly and give a complaint in local police station along with the proof.

Many folks with good heart in this forum want every marriage to be saved.

So, please try your best, give time and chance to your wife and her family for them to realize the need to save the marriage.

But if you have totally lost all faith in your wife, file a police complaint on her behaviour along with proof. Record conversations with her to show them as proof. Then file a case for judicial separation. Then give chance for your wife to demonstrate love and the trust on you.

If she does not come through, at the end of one year of marriage, try to file for mutual consent divorce. Else, file contested divorce.

In any case, do not become an emotional fool and take hurried actions. We, men, many times fall into this emotional trap.

Be wise and handle your wife and family with sensible reasoning and courage.

Do not let them take easy just because the blind gender biased law is in favour of them.

1 Like

sudherrrrr (design)     24 October 2014

Dear All

Now i am working as a Engineer in Cen. Gov company. My wife is working as software engineer. And also my wife is not innocent.

Her father working as a Police officer in Tamil Nadu. Her brother working as a engineer in pvt company.

Only me and my family member are innocent. we think all human being are good-----our mistake only selected this Police family

 

She want to live with me. For that she went to local Police station with help of her father instead of speaking to my parents. Now me and my family member dont like that action. i want to file contested divorce after one year.

1)    Before doing divorce what are thing i have to take care?

2)    Some friends are telling to me that if you divorce "your life going waste"--is right or wrong?

 

Mr. Prasad -------your right. they idea only separating me from my parents

 


 

Prasad (Systems Engineer)     25 October 2014

Hi Sudhaerson,

Even a normal citizen is harassing his son in law using police.

If your father-in-law is police, he can do more harassment.

As mentioned in my earlier reply, buy a good smart phone and install voice recorder in that phone.

Attend all calls from your father-in-law, brother-in-law and wife.

Record all the calls.

This will give you proof for the atrocity and cruelty of your father-in-law and brother-in-law.

Then go boldly and give a complaint in local police station along with the proof.

 

File a police complaint on your wife behaviour, separately, along with proof.

Record conversations with her to show them as proof.

Then file a case for judicial separation.

 

At the end of one year of marriage, file contested divorce.

 

In any case, do not become an emotional fool and take hurried actions.

We, men, many times fall into this emotional trap.

Be wise and handle your wife and family with sensible reasoning and courage.

Do not let them take easy just because the blind gender biased law is in favour of them.

SuperHero (Manager)     25 October 2014

Hello,

Prasad mentioned a good idea. It is the best thing to do in your life. Even if there is local panchayat do a video recording.

When you are recording or they ridicule you don't get emotional and use unparliamentary words.

A word once said can't be taken back. Period.

Because nobody will believe you, what you are talking about. Talks and Words change faster.

Talk to an eminent lawyer.. Go through this forum and many people, lawyers have spent there valuable time and given there advice.

Before marriage - if you would have sensed some red flags then please post it here. So that the future guys will be little cautious.

Red flag meaning - you could see or sense or feel she is not fit for you.

By this time you could easily sense what is going in your life.

There will be many people advising you but be cautious...

From Tajjobs

"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win" By: Mahatma Gandhi

 


Essence of Family Law in India;

"YOU  KNOW  YOUR  WIFE  WELL  ONLY  WHEN  YOU  MEET  HER  IN  COURT"  

Have Patience, Tolerance and most of all HOPE....Pray to God.

 

Adv k . mahesh (advocate)     25 October 2014

first what gone wrong is not mentioned int he query and expecting answer 

1. why they are talking to you on phone and mentally abusing you what they expect from you

2. why your wife left you within 10 days of marriage what steps you have taken to bring her back

3. may be 4 months passed have you initiated any steps to being her back like went personally, involved any elder of their relative to bring her back or what they want have you checked 

4. without solving the problem directly you want to complain in the police station 

in my view at this time you cannot go to court and also what complain you will give at police station so first try to talk to your wife who wants to stay with you and also if your talks are not fruitfull then involve any your or their family elder to resolve the issue as said above if it is not solved then gather all the proofs or evidences and first meet your place local lawyer and discuss about this issue

normally before one year you cannot file contested divorce petition or Mutual consent divorce only annulment petition of marriage as null and void decree from marriage you can file if no physical relation as occurred even that has to be proved 

sudherrrrr (design)     26 October 2014

1. why they are talking to you on phone and mentally abusing you what they expect from you

     Her Father called me on 04.06.2014and asking when u taking my daughter with you. i said that call to my parents to find good day to shift new house. immediately he started telling wrong words. and also he said that i will put you in jail with some false case and  i will spoil you and your family life.

      Her brother called to my father and mother on July month. telling too much wrong  world and also he told to my parents that we are not good family. After 2 days i called him and used angry wrong words. and i asked y u spoke wrong world to my parents. He told that "i used wrong world your parents because you like your parents and asking suggestion"   

Please Note :- I want my parents to take me and my wife to start new life with good date.

2. why your wife left you within 10 days of marriage what steps you have taken to bring her back

     My marriage is may 5th 2014 and i say with her upto may 14th at tamil nadu and i went alone to my working office at Gujarat. After that i booked train ticket on 7th June for my wife, my father, my mother and myself from tamil nadu to gujarat. (3A class).

     Before i start from gujarat. her father called me and telling wrong words. immediately i cancel my train ticket. and inform to my wife y ur father speak like that. so i will come and take you with me.

Please Note:- This is not first time. on 6th may 2014 also her father speak wrong world to my parents at my home.

3. may be 4 months passed have you initiated any steps to being her back like went personally, involved any elder of their relative to bring her back or what they want have you checked 

when ever she call me. i always tell y ur father and brother using wrong word to me and my family. we need apologies from your father and brother. then only i will take you. But she always said to me you dnt worry about my father and brother u take me. How can i take her

4. without solving the problem directly you want to complain in the police station 

Please note her father is police employee in tamil nadu. Her relation are also lawyers in tamil nadu. She always use to tell this words " My family has Police and lawyers"

we can not give any complain to police station. Her father only called to my local police station. This inspector friend of her father . Five days before for speaking this local inspector called my parents to police station in front of my wife, her father and her mother. This local inspector told to my parents forgive every thing take her to your son.

Still me and my family stand " without give any apologies to us we no need this family.

I thing after apologies also this people make problem in future. So what are protection i have to take?

and always family problem me and my parents cannt go police station and court . so i  am planning  to give contested divorce -    

ANAMIKA VICHARE (LAWYER)     27 October 2014

You must file  Divorce Petitin n on the ground of cruelty if you are Hindu n marriage under HMA...u/s.13[1][ia] if one year has passed after marriage.  You nedd not seek consent from yr wife as the Court would grant youdivorce.   but you should have strong pleadings.   Yr wife is earning, she won't get maintenance etc you do not hv chld.  so yr matter is easy

1 Like

sudherrrrr (design)     07 September 2015

Hi friends,

1) i got marriage 5.05.2014.

2) Me and my wife stay together (10 days && 22 days in gujarat). Now we separated 6 month back

3) Now i am working in PSU company in gujarat &&& She working in IT company in chennai

4) And last month she send advocate letter. In that she given dowry and DV against my self and my parents (All are not true). she given total 50 points. and Final point she want divorce with 50 Lakh otherwise she will file 498a case and DV case on me and my parents. (total 8 pages)

5) I send reply by my advocate this all points are false. i stated that i will not give divorce and money. i stated that i want live with her. and i given my points also ( total 12 pages)

my query is

a) next step what they will do?

b) what i did right or not?

c) once they will file 498a & DV. Police will arrest me and my parents? because i am gov employee.

I walk alone (Asst Manager)     07 September 2015

Hi Sudherson Sir.

I'm sorry to say, your statement sounds quite inconsistant to me. considering that you've not taken any dowry, how come, on the very next day of your marriage, your FIL becomes such furious to utter any bad words to you?

One place you say that you booked and cancelled the tickets and then again you say your wife stayed with you for 22 days in Gujrat, pls clear the air..

Pls do not mistake me, just out of curiosity, are you sure that in between no dowry was given by them? (Otherwise its little hard for me to believe)

Have you guys (your family & her family) have sat togther to understand where is this mis-match?

Pls understand, every action has a re-action, hence, if you in-laws have acted such strangely, then obviously there must have been anything which you forgot to mention here in first place.

to answer your query

a) Next as your FIL is in police, expect a sour harrasment from them very soon. they will file a complaint in Local PC and CAW and thru which they will harras you.

b) In papers you're right, but, as previously mentioned by Adv Mahesh, you should have gone to every possible door to take her back, which you didnt do bcz of fear.

c) To resist the arrest pls take help of the lawer you're consulting now, and get the AB for yourself and your parents. dont apply for normal bail, go for AB.


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