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preeti singh (pamela.arora29@gmail.com)     25 December 2011

Husband wants divorce and wife does nt

hi sir/mam

i have been staying away from my husband  with my younger son since 4yrs nearly .he had been very cruel to me and man handled me so many a times  but i tolerated everything becz of my kids.my elder son is doing job in pune n younger one has finished graduation. my husband is an engg on a high post and in 2015 he will retire from his services.

he has been giving 12k in the beginning but later on he started giving 15k when his salary is 1lac 70k /month.i m staying in a flat which is on joint name with my husband as the 1st owner n he is staying in his own flat for the last 1.5yrs.in all these yrs i have been requesting him to increase the monthly amount but he didnt agree n instead alwayz  insulted me.in feb 2011 .oct 11.n now on 22nd dec i have repeatedly written him letters to increase the money but he has nt done anything in this regard,

now i come to now that he has filed divorce case .

i dont want to let him be free like that . i mean  i dont want to divorce him .i want to make him suffer the way he tortured me mentally n physically 

my question is how i can avoid divorce ..on what pleas it can be dragged .from every angle i want to sue him n want to file cases .plz advice what is to be done so that divorce does not becomes so easy for him.

secondly what i can get as a monthly expenditure and on what basis i can make divorce impossible .he has been showing all his salary very less n invested here n there .

i am sure u will show me the ways through which he can also be captured.

thanx n regards !!

 



Learning

 11 Replies

K.P.Satish Kumar (Advocate)     25 December 2011

Please file a maintenace petition in the court to increase the amount. And also file a petition for restitution of conjugal rights. And in the mean time you should contest the divorce case. otherwise your husband will get an ex-parte divorce.

Visit: https://yourdivorceadvocate.blogspot.com

1 Like

Nadeem Qureshi (Advocate/ nadeemqureshi1@gmail.com)     25 December 2011

Dear Preeti

what are the grounds of his divorce petition?

1 Like

(Guest)
Originally posted by :preeti
"
  he has been giving 12k in the beginning but later on he started giving 15k when his salary is 1lac 70k /month.i m staying in a flat which is on joint name with my husband as the 1st owner n he is staying in his own flat for the last 1.5yrs.in all these yrs i have been requesting him to increase the monthly amount but he didnt agree n instead alwayz  insulted me.in feb 2011 .oct 11.n now on 22nd dec i have repeatedly written him letters to increase the money but he has nt done anything in this regard,

now i come to now that he has filed divorce case .

i dont want to let him be free like that . i mean  i dont want to divorce him .i want to make him suffer the way he tortured me mentally n physically 

my question is how i can avoid divorce ..on what pleas it can be dragged .from every angle i want to sue him n want to file cases .plz advice what is to be done so that divorce does not becomes so easy for him.

secondly what i can get as a monthly expenditure and on what basis i can make divorce impossible .he has been showing all his salary very less n invested here n there .

i am sure u will show me the ways through which he can also be captured.



 
"

Dear Ma'am,
 

your Above Posts shows Grudge & Anger towards your husband, 

Can you Throw Light on Expeses made by him on Education of your Childern ??

Just not Increasing Money you want to Harrass him, That is too at the Old Age, where Both you need Each Other,
The True Essence of Marriage is only when you reach this Age, once your Childeren will Marry and Go their ways, who will look after you and your husband?

Many like yours in Indian society Married women Starts with Sentence that they are the victim of their Husband for Abuse, and Very weapon/Sheild they use is "Chiilderen" agaist any Husband.

My Question is Why you tolerated your husband at very first place when he was harrassing since very Begining?

Secondly Now I Assume your Childern are Well Grown and Capable of Earning,
So you want your Husband life like Hell ?? That's Not fair.. Laws for Protection.

Appriciate your posting "Husband wants Divorce and you dont want"  :)
That's BASIC Woman Nature, they speak in a Way that All faults by their Husbands and not their Own, but The Truth here is you also want Divorce but Want to make his Life Tough, and Looking for sort of Monertary Relief??
If I'm not Wrong? ??


Please have A talk with him, and try to Solve it Amicably. You both have Reached an Age where both will need each other, make him understand, and try to Solve.

May God Bless you Both..
 

1 Like

(Guest)

And As far As Divorce is Concern, He will not get it Without your Consent :)

preeti singh (pamela.arora29@gmail.com)     26 December 2011

hii

thanx for ur advice 

first of all  let me ans ur Qs....being a girl frm a middle class family with values i wz alwz adviced by my family to adjust to whatever the extent may be. the main reason waz his family  who played a major role in our life and till now its going on which is impossible to digest  for any third person.there are some people who remain like this for the whole life and its nt so easy to understand the pain n sufferings which i have undergone for these long yrs n still tolerating.

in ur profession u may be coming in contact with so many a cases so u said me that this is my anger and grudge and about human nature but  the thing is he has made me to suffer a lot on every level ..social.emotional n financial .in order to save his skin he has told evrybody that i have left him whereas the reality is its opp.i have tried a lot to settle the things but all in vain.n now in present circumstances its impossible to settle down  with him as i m scared of my life  and aboveall he has relation with another lady too .

secondly i didnt want my kids to see this phase of separation so i contd with him under one roof.he waz very ruthless n abusive n violent not towards me but towards the kids also.as a result kids were also suffering  along with. can u imagine he is not in speaking terms with my kids since 10yrs.i sacrificed my whole life for my kids n had a great hope that one day he will realise n everything will be okay but it wz in vain.now he wants my kids to leave me n thus break me on this front becz he knows that  i cant stay without kids so he said me to be separate for 3-4 months but it wz his plan which i cudnt understand at that time.but 3-4 months became yrs .its nt possible to pen down evrything but in short i have tried.i do understand words carry different meanings everytime u go through them so u have concluded from my words which may not have that much impact on u to show how much painful my life is ,may b i m nt so very nice  when it comes to writing.

yes u r rt my kids r grown up n elder1 is married n i m facing problem from my daughter in law also who is slowly diverting my son towards my husband becz of his money n property .she has made it very much clear.i have never used my kids against their father and didnt tell anything instaed about what happened in my life but when they started seeing things themselves ,problems increased.

i tried all efforts to in the beginning but he kept on still abusing n harrassing me n indirectly closing my ways to go back to him.now he has changed his tactic  by saying that he is ready to keep me with him n i am not ready.he is in govt job n i have nt taken any undue advantage of anything .i mean ladies often misuse the rules which are made in their favour but its my bad luck that being so very true n still he is proving me culprit everywhere even in my kid's eyes.what can be more painful for a mother .i am emotionally broken up n the way he has given this 15k ,i had to undergo  haraassment for evrything.

and now if i want that he should also be punished ,what wrong i am doing?i would have forgotten all those yrs of pain if he had nt contd in this period.so if u advice me some ways  so that he dont get divorce ,i willl be so grateful to u.no woman wants to break her house but when nothing happens n everything goed beyond control,what can be done?

kindly try to understand my problem. one of the reason that my elder son's matter .if he had nt tried to take backdoor entry in my son's life ,i wud have settled evrything but now he will make my condition more miserable  n i cant  tolerate to die every inch then.4yrs is long span n he wants to get married to that woman with whom he is having relations since yrs.

most imp thing i have been informed about his divorce case n he has said the date is 12th jan.what does it mean?i know nothing abt any such thing n now my question is if any notice comes ..should i take or delay it.

plz advice me n the ways atleast what should i do to avoid divorce .hope u will try to see the pain through which my life has gone .

thanx n regards 

plz forgive me if u feel bad about my words sometimes it becomes very difficult to convey through words.

 

preeti singh (pamela.arora29@gmail.com)     26 December 2011

hii sir

very sad to say that u have :) on my pain .i really got  hurt  ..just now i saw ur msg.had i  seen it earlier i woould nt have written u anything about myself.how can u do justice when u  dont feel the pain of ur advice seeker.  .ur profession should not make u to see everybody with the same eye n feel.there are every kind of people in t his world and let me tell u i am not like that who will let  anybody suffer without any reason.what a mother undergoes when his husband tries to snatch her kids ,her emotional strength .being oversensitive and emotional person i am under mental agony. i have tolerated enough and its high time now i should not tolerate more.i have a right to live my life n he has made my life a hell so why cant he be punished for his deeds.

i know u will not like the way i have written but hope u will certainly realise that how ur :) can affect the person who is in pain .u should give moral support along with .it matters a lot.

i am sorry becz i know u will feel bad as to who am i to say u everything but if u think with a cool mind abt ur msg ..m sure u will try to understand the depth of my words.

i request u to be kind to people in ur words  so that they are not discouraged by such attitudes just as i felt it today .

 

preeti singh (pamela.arora29@gmail.com)     26 December 2011

hii

i have not received yet  so i dont know.i came to know that my husband has filed divorce case n that the date is 12th jan.

my q is 

should i take  notice  if it comes or i should delay n secondly what does this date means?? n what should i do now??

pl advice

preeti singh (pamela.arora29@gmail.com)     26 December 2011

hii Mr zameer

first of all i am sorry  for my words

actually i am mentally very much disturbed so i misunderstood ur msg.plz forgive me.

Self service (None)     26 December 2011

You won't get any thing other than more problems. You have house and he is giving some money from many years. You may get some maintenance amount other than nothing. In this old age better to spend time on doing good things and in temples instead of courts and lawyers.

What if your son get married and his wife develop same attitude towards you? Do not go with revenge full attitude.


(Guest)

@Preeti

First of All my Apologies if I hurt you, I really didn’t mean that. And Secondly I’m not Lawyer :-) 

I’m 7 Months Newly Married man, I belong to Muslim Family, and My Marriage Lasted for 42days,

My so called wife left me without my consent putting all false allegations in FIR.
So Somehow we are sailing Same Boat..  (This may give you Moral Support that you are not alone)

As far as your case is Concern, you said, your husband is saying he dont want to leave you.. thats good..

Let him say same thing in Court. so Divorce will be Dismissed without doubt.

By Any means you dont take any action,let him do whatever he wants Because laws make more harsh to families and relations and then it makes very difficult to make Even if you want to.
As per your age, you will be Advice for Counselling or Mediation by Court, before hearing for Divorce.
and belive me it takes years for HMA to pass divorce Decree.

He need Strong Ground for Divorce + Valid Reason.

So Relax, let him Initiate divorce.. Dont panic


(Guest)

@Preeti M'am

"i m scared of my life  and aboveall he has relation with another lady too  i have a right to live my life n he has made my life a hell so why cant he be punished for his deeds.."

"plz advice me n the ways atleast what should i do to avoid divorce "

Can you Decide what Exactly you want ??

Rest is upto you.........


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