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Anjuru Chandra Sekhar (Advocate )     15 May 2012

In support of bombay hc comments on sita

Was watching Barkha’s Buck stops “there” regarding Bombay HC judgment that women should be like Goddess Sita.  So many views came up in the discussion, and I found there some people have no idea of how to analyse the characters of mythology.  There need to understand the modes of nature to analyse the characters of mythology, then they will realize that the characters of mythology are still relevant for us. 

We all feel nice and comfortable being with a humble person and get repelled by a haughty, egoistic person.  At the end of the day, all the struggle and conflicts that we experience with others is because they lack humility.  Humility is a character to be practiced and achieved through thorough understanding of self and also perhaps through karma yoga which involves sacrifice. 

How to make others like us, is as relevant today, as it was during Treta yuga.  So we have to understand this analysis from the perspective of modes of nature which provides a framework to have an understanding about our behavior and also our perceptions and thought patterns.   I will just touch 2, 3 issues not more than that to explain.  Issues means, issues between a married couple, ie., husband and wife and how a Satvic wife reacts and how a wife under Rajas and Tamas reacts.

 

Issue

Woman under the influence of Satva

Woman under influence of Rajas + Tamas

Going to Andaman and Nicobar Islands from Mumbai when husband gets transfer.   Husband gives information and asks whether she is willing -

Wherever you are there I am.

(Perception of this woman by women under Rajas and Tamas – Weak in character and assertiveness)

I have got my own work to do in Mumbai, I can’t over there.  Husband pleads, please come for the sake of children.  Wife says, they can be anywhere either with you or with them, my career is more important for me.

 

Career

Can adjust with husband accordingly and if needed joins a small job.

(Perception by Rajasic and Tamasic woman of this woman: Don't have individuality of her own, one should have the ability to assert oneself, just because one is woman does not mean, she lose her individuality for the sake of husband).

I have got my own image in society and reputation as a professional in the world of professionals, I cannot sacrifice my image for the sake of accompanying you to Andaman, I don’t get opportunities there that commensurate my talent.  Husband pleads, “money is not a problem for us, I am also earning, do some small job there”.  Wife replies, “why should I?  I have got my own image and individuality, if I do small job, people will not identify me as I am they will identify me as your wife.  I cannot accept that, because I have got my own individuality.”.

Husband likes Eating Brinjals Wife doesn’t.  Husband says, I like Brinjals.

That is OK.  I do not like brinjals very much, but if you like I will also try to like it. 

(perception by Rajasic and Tamasic woman :  Naukraani hai no character of her own)

I don’t like brinjals (should express her assertiveness), I like lady fingers only.  My dad brings ladyfingers at least twice or thrice a week for me.

Husband likes character called Sita. 

I do not have any idea about her, tell me what she all about, I want to know.  (Interest in things that husband likes, she wants to be part of his world)

Don’t bore me yaar! (she has a world of her own, and her own choices, don't care what husband likes)

Husband gets promotion, but he has to go to Delhi from Mumbai.  He says I don’t want promotion, I want to remain here only.  In the present position I get more time to spend with you.

No problem.  Children need both of us.  Whatever we get from this position is sufficient.  I agree with you.  (no greed)

 

Don’t be mad I say, you won’t get this opportunity time and again.  I can remain and children can remain but job growth doesn’t remain.  Go for it at any cost.  I don’t mind living without you. (greedy)

 



Learning

 1 Replies

Anjuru Chandra Sekhar (Advocate )     15 May 2012

Understanding life through religion this way provides a solution to many married couples in conflict with each other and moving towards separation....


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