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vipin yadav (none)     11 September 2010

wife give threats of 498 and demands cash and half property

hi dis is vipin yadav frm delhi, married in jan 2005 with a girl from faridabad,haryana. she has fertility probs and i fed up of changing doctors from last 4 years.she got frustrated and started abusing me n my family.i askd her parents to come and make things fine but they too abused and threatened me n my family which results now i want divorce. but when i askd her for divorce ,she n her family askd for much more then enough cash and half of my property. she called police too.now me and my family live in another place on rent and she living in my home alone from last 5 months.time by time she calls me n threats like she will commit suicide if i file any case of divorce against her.help me.....



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 34 Replies

N.K.Assumi (Advocate)     11 September 2010

498a  has become a a good way of making money for the Indian wives. Need to look afreash at this provisions:in fact it is a blot in our stautes and criminal jurisprudence.

Adv Archana Deshmukh (Practicing Advocate)     11 September 2010

Why don't you think of adopting a child instead, if the baby is the root of all the frustration as it appears from your post. Talk to your wife and try to resolve the issue amicably.

4 Like

Arup (UNEMPLOYED)     11 September 2010

what you want, continue the marriage or divorce?

proceed accordingly.

1 Like

Democratic Indian (n/a)     11 September 2010

I agree with opinion of Adv. Archana. Marriage should be considered more of an emotional bond than a contract to create babies. Divorce for fertility problems is a very selfish reason. In this age mordern age there are so many treatments available. I personally know of a case where a lady was not able to concieve for 7 years, but was able to concieve with proper medical treatment. Adoption is also a good option. There are so many orphan children adopt one and help change his/her life.

I also know of a case where husband was sterile due to excessive alcohol consumption and was blaming his wife for not concieving. When the parents of the girl confronted him and forced him to get medically examined, the fact came out in medical report.

4 Like

(Guest)

i totally agree with democratic indian and adv archana

she's suicidal becoz she's afraid of losing u....plz be more humane in ur approach..

 

there are many couples i know who did not have children all thru their life..still they live happily forever...and if u r so keen on having a baby,plz adopt one

 

there's no guarantee that if u marry another woman who bears a child,she will be a good wife...wot if she treats u with cruelty later?u will then regret ur remarriage

...


(Guest)

Oh...

So here passing threats, calling police without an issue  is being justified, ..... My goodness!!!!!!!

 

Democratic Indian (n/a)     11 September 2010

@Avinash

The point to be noted is that still she has not filed 498A, even though she is fully and completely justifed in filing 498A under such circumstances of mental creulty by husband who is threatening divorce just because of percieved incurable sterility, it shows she wants to save her marriage. Note the language of her husband, he says he is "i fed up of changing doctors" Which clearly shows his motive and he does not want to take responsibility. His intention is "changing wife"

What else is wanted from her and her parents in this situation of threats by her husband and his family? Fall at their feet and beg?

Please note:

1) Taking help of police is no crime.

2) Telling a person that help of law will be taken is also no threat or crime. All people are supposed to take help of law to get relief.

3 Like

(Guest)

Well .......nfertility is a ground of divorce So talking legally he is right in saying that he may seek divorce.

 

It is not mental cruelty

Adv Archana Deshmukh (Practicing Advocate)     11 September 2010

Will you please quote the provision of law under which infertility is a ground for divorce. I would like to know the Act, its relevant section, if you please...

1 Like

(Guest)

I may be wrong, but my impression is,  under hindu marraige act if one is able to prove that  they are not able to procreate, it is ground of divorce. Please let me know if it is otherwise

 

And since when talking of divorce became ground of creulty? It is cruelty to call police for the false reason, throw parents out of home and pass threats, and saying that they will implicated in wrong 498A cases.

Adv Archana Deshmukh (Practicing Advocate)     11 September 2010

Please remove this wrong impression because, wife / husband unable to procreate is no ground for divorce under Hindu Marriage Act or under any other law. So, even if one proves infertility of the spouse in the court of law, divorce shall never be granted for this reason.

3 Like

Self service (None)     11 September 2010

Avinash,

Having kids is your right. You have to take all steps to became father. As long as your wife is cooperative for medical treatments you can not say it as cruelity or non cooperation. In case wife is not cooperative in medical treatment or ignore treatment is cruelity. You need to gather all medical records to prove above cause. Just she is not fertile can not be reason for divorce.

All other things she is doing is creulity against you: 1. Calling police /false complaints and insult in presence of others, unreasonable money demands and property issues.

If you want to divorce file divorce and I think thats the option you left now becuase once things reach out of home (police etc) you can not sleep any time with such partner.

Do one thing behave good with wife, give her expenses etc and keep collecting evidences of her threats/demands etc. Also consult good lawyer and file for divorce that will help you in court later if she files false complaints.

Take decision properly do not work under threats. better to take stress for few years then whole life.

1 Like

vipin yadav (none)     11 September 2010

dear sir/madam....y u guys argueing on dis matter widout me??

its only me who knows evrything....one saying adopt child...another saying be human....okkk

1. no child is never a prob frm my side...i said fed up of changing doctrs because she forced me to change doctors evry six mnths treatmnt which end up by saying "is doctor k baska nahi hai...doosra dhundti hu" by her. already my 5 lacs gone just for her sake n her stupidity too.she even did Tona-totka for dis ,which i tolrated for her belief. i never complaint her for her infertility probs...i can live widout no child forevr...but i want her to be calm n peaceful wid me...but nooo....she fights n abuse me all d time ....even she abused like a guy...ma-behen kinda words. now i want divorce because things are out of control now...i belong to very decent family...i never abuse or even slap her though she has done evrything which she could. how can i still live with her?? may be sum of u can still live but i cant. i am hurt inside...kind of depressed.

2. sum1 says be human.....ok wot more i can do now???

she has done evrything wrong with me and my family....though she is living in my home and we r living on rent...and u better know how difficult for a medium family to shift suddenly and arrange evrything. in parents last meeting...she n her family abused me n my family...from my side...no one even replied for dat...they blame evrything like i am loose character ,hav so many galfrnds etc etc....i could do the same but i didnt...she is habitual of tobacco....i tolrated dat too....wot more u guys want frm me as a human???

i asked her family member to come for complainting my probs....but after that meeting.....i cant live wid her anymore....infact " Mera shadi ka aisa experience raha hai k ab to dar lagta hai har aurat se"....n she says "vipin u look handsome and young n u will get new girl but i cant get any new man now...so mera kuch ho nahi sakta isliye tera main kuch hone nahi dungi".....

i have no plans for remarriage....i will not marry again ever....wanna stay alone...i requested her dat if u dont wanna give divorce den its ok....but plz leave me alone....she laughed and refused by saying "tujhe barbaad ker k hi jaungi"......i am depressed....having treatment from a psychaterist....coz i cant sleep .....dont know wot else to say now.....

Adv Archana Deshmukh (Practicing Advocate)     11 September 2010

Any member will advice you only on the basis of the facts supplied by you mr vipin. And the above advices were also based on what appears from your own post. You better continue with your treatement and keep yourself normal. I think your wife also need some treatement. You can file for divorce on the ground of cruelty. But beware as your wife have threatened you 'tujhe barbaad ker k hi jaungi' then, if she files criminal complaints against you like s.498a, dv etc that will land you in further trouble, and you be prepared to face them all.


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