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Aaditya   27 March 2016

Can i propose my wife that i dont want child due 2 hr tortur

Dear friends,

Please suggest me leagly,

I am a middle class family person.My father is about to retire,my mother's health is not well before and still.I have a younger brother who is studying.

One year ago my marriage was done.I had put all my family situation infront of my wife before marrige.

But she has started threatening me my fammilly after marriage and her parents gives her support.They force me to leave my family.

During one of year of my  marriage life she has stayed with me only three to four months.She tortures my mother and even me also and threaten me for false case.

I have given her 1 year to understand but she is not ready.

she and her parents tried to insulte me n my familly infront of my neighbourhood but My neighbourhood have support me.But she has threaten me that she will impluse cases at my neighbourhood also.

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She has used very cheap words for me and my parents she has told me impotant and denied when asked by parents.

But to torture me she says every time that my extra marital affaire is going on and my family torture her even she has called police against my parents and told them my parents torture her, but my neighbours had control all the matters.

Even I have cctv recording of one month that no any violence is done even my familly members does not enter her room.She dont know the cctv.I have put a FIR also against her family member.

But no action is taken.

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Now she and her familly knows that my neighbourhood supports me So she is enforcing me to live saperate.

I have fratuctued in my hand but she left me in this situation and now when I am being ok then she enforce me to live separate,But I told her that I did not send her so I did not come to back her, If she wants then she can come herself.

She and her parents says that I am responsible only against my wife and my father is there for my mother.But what will happen after my father retirement.He always have given me every support for my study.Now when I am able to do somthing for parents then I am enforcing by false case.

My father can manage in one point of view but what will happen for my mother.

Why these things are not considerable by law.

She can blams my character and I can not say her truth due to law.It is partiale law.

I have told her that my parents is everything for me and I could left everything even my job n my life for my parents.

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Please suggest

What should I do Is there no law against these type of cruleity ?

I want divorce her I got so mantlly tortured.

Regards,

Aaditya



Learning

 11 Replies

SAINATH DEVALLA (LEGAL CONSULTANT)     27 March 2016

When U put before her UR entire family situation before marriage,has she agreed to it?If so her behaviour after marriage is unwarranted.In most of the cases the over involvement of elders of both the sides escalates the differences between the husband and the wife.It is the husband and the wife that have to resolve whatever comes accross in their marital life, which is hardly one year.

My assessment is that she is not in favour of a joint family and wants to have a family of her own.Don't think of divorce at this stage.I sympathise with the harrassement of UR inlaws.

Both of U sit together and try to resolve everything or through counselling and mediation.

If U fail in that too,then think of a legal separation.

 

 

SAINATH DEVALLA (LEGAL CONSULTANT)     27 March 2016

The title of UR query has no significance to the other contents

dr g balakrishnan (advocate/counsel supreme court)     27 March 2016

i can't say it is cruelty; when you feel that when you accepted to marry you need to have visualized  the problems of today's marriages, besides yr private and persinal problems, you could have postponed yr marriage if you were prudent, ad you position in yr case here; solution is she needs to be away from yr parents, if so you need to move out but you could support yr parents by mutually requesting yr wife to do  jon if educated or run some private chikd care so that she could make some money; every woman wants child like she needed husband that you need to realize so too yr parents - besides yr brother can dosome part work to help you to rightly support him too; today one income never meet both ends in all kinds of families sir, reconstruct yr thought and you can easily solve. regards.

saravanan s (legal advisor)     27 March 2016

Create records for whatever threatenings, false allegations she makes over you.this will be of help when she files false cases over you anytime.also make an nc in the police station to protect u when she files fslse case.from her behaviour it is clear that she doesn't want you to stay with your parents.take a seperate accommodation near your parents house and see whether she changes.if not the above said things will be of use to you.

Aaditya   27 March 2016

Dear Friend,

Thanx to reply me.

I have told all my familliy situation infront of her and her parents before marriage fix.They told our daugther will handle all familly.At that time they need our yes only for marriage and planned that after marriage I have to follow as she tells.

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I have tired lot.One Panchayat has been done also.

Panchayat said that girl should stay with me at my home.But within a month she has called police against my parents in absence of mine at a small query with me.

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Her parents tried to insult me my parents.They told why you do not spaerate from your parents.

I have also tried to take home near by my location but she has refused this proposal and told me that she will stay not nearby my location whereas her brother which is already saperated due to her mother behaviour,he is staying in same home.Then why I need to took another home from there I would be unable to lookafter my parents and job easly.

She wants that there should be no touch of my parents.

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Anyway I do not have child and dont want in futrue because that I can not saperate from my parents and can not destroy a my being child life due to misbehaviour of my wife.Because she has already told me that she will hire someone to lookafter child.

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She is not working, does not want to live with parents and wants some one caretaker for my being child then on this basis could I put leagal contract or proposal that I dont want child untill her behaviour is not OK ?.

As her parents has insulted me infront of my neighbourhood So that I have already told her and her parents that this time I did not send her So I will not come to get her back.She has to come back by herself if wants after this I will try to take another home as I have frature in my hand and not able to search another home.

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I want also to reject all her gifted goods by her parents at the time of marriage to her parents because her parents and she has  isulted me many time due to this and her mother also told me many time that she will pull all the things back.

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They have also threathen me for court and falsly told infront of my neighbour that they have spent 15 lack at my marriage where as It is totaly wrong proof is : Purchased Electronics goods receipt which near about 90000 Rs.

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Could I reject all gifted goods to her parents leaglay ?

 

Please suggest.

Aaditya   27 March 2016

Samir N (General Queries) (Business)     28 March 2016

Assuming that your one-sided statements are true (I am sure that she will have her side too)... you are entitled to divorce. False police complaints against you, your parents, etc. can be used by you to prove cruelty against you by her. 

Either way... once there are police complaints and criminal cases filed, the marriage is over. So, just file for divorce and put an end to the torture... 

Born Fighter (xxx)     28 March 2016

Looks like a potential DV and 498a is on the way !

 

Your wife wants to control you thats the problem. There is no respect for you and your family. She wants ALL and wants to give NOTHING in return.

 

If you want to save the marriage YOU HAVE TO LEAVE YOUR PARENTS place .........please realize that as thats the MAJOR demand of ur wife.

 

You have already given her an option to stay in seperate accomodation  nearby ur parents residence, which is the best solution as a Husband /Son, since she is not accepting the same then what else is left.......

 

You can pack ur bags and stay with ur wife OR take an accomodation at a place of wife's choice OR nearby ur wife's parents house (this is what she wants).

 

You can do the above and continue being in a abusive relationship. U do not want a child for sometime due to this chaos is a logical decision as future is unclear. 

 

As a last try and if u can afford stay with ur wife at a place of her choice for a year and see if situation improves, if it does then slowly she will understand that u need ur parents also & things can change for better......However be prepared to still stay in an accomodation minus ur parents. Also if u do so it willl take less than 3 months for u to realize what she is upto. (also keep gathering evidences of cruelty if it continues ) ..........then u can either stay or quit the relationship !

 

Aaditya   01 April 2016

Dear Friends,

Now my wife has filled a complaint in crime against women cell against me and my parents.

What should be the next step by me?I think now she has shown that she is not intrested in the relationship.

 

 

Aaditya   03 April 2016

Dear Friends,

Thanx for your advice,

Should it be right to propose her directly for settlement.Because every talk she did recorded and still recording. Then how to propose for settlement.

Aaditya   11 April 2016

Hello,

I have attended first counselling by CAW cell.But They did not listen my any talk.They asked from wife's side.Even lady SI (Counsler)has instructed my wife to go gor court instead of doing marriage counselling.

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As per our last dispute my wife had written a letter to police station incharge in presence of two police men and her 8-10 relatives including her parents and brother, that she went from my house to her parents by herself with her parents without any pressure.She has all her jwellary in her parents house and will return when I will do arrangements for separate accomodation.

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During this I was suffering with right hand shoulder fracture and after a month bed rest I had to join my office to save my job.Office is providing up - down cab facility and provided me the support for office work.Even still I am not able to put  my hand freely in up side.

---I was not able to keep my wife back so I have told her "If you want to come then you may and I will arrange separate accomodation when I will be able.

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But against this she has filed complaint in CAW cell.She is threatening that I am not comming to take her back even I am attending my office.

She is saying that during last disputes she had write a letter to police in under pressure even her parents and her all relatives ,two police men and my neighbourhood was present.How could refuse it and CAW counseller is ignoring this letter.Which is singen by her and received by police station.

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She has threaten me That I was tried to kill her during my hoonymoon.She has threaten me that I and my familly had bitten her.She has threaten me that her parents had spent 15 lakh including 4 lakh cash.

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Thease are totally false and CAW cell is ignoring my facts even my fracture.

And in counselling still she(wife) has written  a letter to SI(CAW Cell counsler) that she wants live with me but saperate from my parents.If she wants live with then why she has threaten my parents and younger innocent brother.

Whenever I put my facts infront of counseller my wife put so many allegation on me to misguide her(Counseller)

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What I should do.

Thease time I am going on notice period and after two months I will not have my JOB still I looking for another.

Should I put this situation infront of Counseller.But she has applied so many false and bad allegation on me and my parents She and her parents did always to insult me and indirectly proposed me to live as my wife wants.

No any men could do this what should I do.

Thanks


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