HELLO EVERYBODY !!
I AM REALLY REALLY HOPING TO GET SOME ADVICE HERE. I'VE BEEN TOSSED AND TURNED AROUND FROM EVERY PILLAR TO POST. I REALLY HOPE PEOPLE IN THIS FORUM CAN HELP !!
LONG STORY SHORT -
I FEAR A 498A, DV AND ALL POSSIBLE CASES TO BE PUT ON ME AND MY FAMILY. THE MARRIAGE IS JUST 3 months ols and i', suffering tons of mental trauma ...
pasted below is my story...
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I KNOW IT IS LONG BUT WOULD APPRECIATE IF THE MEMBERS COULD READ ...
Like most of the men today I submitted to the desire of my parents to get married to girl from a respectable Christian family and wished, hoped and dreamt of a life like every other happily married couple would have (a husband in my case). To ensure there is compatibility between the two of us, I have spoken to XXXX for almost a month before marriage and advised her of everything that I am. Right from my financial status to my habits, my belongings, my assets and the reason why I would want to get married to her. The primary reason has always been “Her understanding heart”. Considering the work I do, I have also clearly mentioned to her that I smoke and catch up for a peg or two during weekends just to ease out my pressures at work. Till date I have never spoken abusive or hit or denied her of the basic human necessities. As far as my judgment goes, I have given her more than basic. Also please note that I have never come to home so drunk that led to a indecent argument with my wife in any way.
One of occasions when she came back from her native place which is in AP, she was found diluting some powder which she claims will reduce my asthama, smoking. Please note (I have never had Asthama) My Grandmom & Mom had caught her in the act and stopped the incident from taking place. Now, we till date don’t know if it is powder with an intention on Black Magic or even if it is genuine, that according to my reasoning is not ethical.
She could have always told me about it. That set the stage of fear in my heart
of being close to her.
Sir, I work in an MNC and make about 30K a month and run the whole family of 5 people. Right from the 2nd month of marriage onwards she started pestering me for a honey moon and all I asked for is a month’s time to adjust for the extra cash and she started saying things about her friends going on honeymoon and how her husband’s friends managed the same. We do have a television at home that we use, but my wife wanted an Plasma. When I put my foot down, she suggested of an installment scheme. She then suggested for a AC
at home. Sir, these were definitely deemed by me as in appropriate. I have put my foot down and advised her the break down of my salary and where my commitments go including the money spent on her and us as a couple.
XXX claims to be an Engineer by profession and her
family including herself claims that she has worked some where in Chennai and wanted her to get a Job in Bangalore. I have with my heart and mind encouraged this thought. However, when she started attending interviews here in Bangalore for companies like XXX like any other corporate they asked for a Form 16 which I am shocked she does not have. She started asking me for 4500 Rs of money to get it done using influence of her Aunt who is a Judge from AP. Sir, playing with the income tax is according to me not a Joke and I have put my foot down on this.
Apart from all said and done, my parents have never asked her to cook, sweep or do any house hold work and treated her with high dignity. Even if they had asked her to cook, I know this for a fact that she does not know how to cook.
She slowly started going out on the pretext of going to the
internet or for a walk but inform my parents for the sake of informing them. One of the days when she came back home late from the neighbors house, my mom and dad asked her why she came late and my mom said about the neighbor lady complaining of her going to their house with taunts. XXXX got wild with that and questioned the neighbor lady out from her house who has a little kid with her at the time of the incident. My dad requested several times to XXXX to amicably deal with the matter and to let the neighbor lady go. However, despite all efforts from my 60 year old dad, 50 year old mom & 75 year old grand mom, she blocked the doorway of the neighbor and started telling her that she wont leave her unless otherwise. My dad had to intervene with a slap on her face in the best interest of the mother and kid (Our neighbor)
With this incident she left home at in the night and went
and filed a written complaint in the local police station. With that
Slap to protect get the matter in control she may and knowing her will may accuse me and my family with a 498a, DV act. Your honor, if you choose to talk to me,
Me, my family, relatives & friends are anticipating extreme pressure from Andhra as her aunt is a Judge and her uncle is a CI and I also have a feeling that their eye is on us constantly trying to tap our calls and keep us under the influence of goons.
So hereby I request you to please and kindly personally intervene into the matter to know the truth and facts and direct the case for fare investigation. For which I am standing by the police authorities with my extended support.I am also sure for your support which will definitely increase our confidence in Police Proceedings and De-Motivate the misuse of 498A.
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THE END
Questions -
The marriage took place in adhra ? Can she file a case on us from andhra ?? Considering the incident took place in karnatak...
Her lawyer called us up threatening of a case and I don't understand why he would suggest us to take a AB .. ?
Her father is always calling and asking our family to come back to Andhra and take her back which me and my family are completely unwilling to given the above cirumstances ? what is the best way to proceed towards a seperation ?
Her father is calling us up and sometimes he is asking for the money spent on us and the marriage saying they dont want to put the case, some times he says your family has to come there and take her back .. Please advise how to best deal with this. ...
My lawyer says we cannot proceed towards a divorce until the marriage comes to a year.. Is that true ..?
Considering they have judicial / govt influence in andhra what is it that i can do to quash some of their stunts that they may try...?
Please forum members I really need your help on this ...
I have read in some other forums that since she has left home. the police will not usually file and FIR.. Her parents and family are putting pressure on us that they will go to the media and they want us to take her back. I am also aware that such a thing happens again it is beyond repair. What can i best do given these situations. ??
