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Littlepoor (Engineer)     25 June 2010

Possible reply for RCR from wife

I got married in chennai, last year june. She is working in chennai and I am working in Bangalore. From the day one, I had problems. Till now, we did not have any s*xual relationship, and she is not at all interested in that.

When I tried to ask her about the transfer, she use to get angry and we have phone fight, she came only 3 times to Bangalore and 2 times to my native. Her parents also simply blaming me as I am getting angry. I tried to speak with her, her relatives and through my relative to her parents, but nothing turned up good.

Then I sent a legal notice too and then I filed RCR case,2 months back. Till now I did not get any reply. But they arranged a lawyer and he asked for postponed date for two times. At this situation, what should I do. I am worrying about my parents and my career, am I in a good job, in a big MNC. Please advise me, as my lawyer is so senior, I could not ask him freely, so I posted here for guidance.




 17 Replies


1. Sack Senior Lawyer with whom you after paying can't even discuss your case then what is the point to have a Senior Lawyer that also for RCR !

2. Now hire a Junior Lawyer by searching database of LCI Ld. members here with whom you can even go to Marina beach hand in hand and discuss all your issues.

BTW why ask a question in loopy format :-)

Having said above:

A. Watch for any CAW Cell activity they may plan and take you and your family for a surprise for.
B. Keep Patience afterall you are now married na.
C. In anticipation of any eventuality announce to everyone that maritial problems in hand, atleast they may come handy in case of need of any IPC penal action wife side may take
D. Softly be pushy into their camp to know what is in their mind. Means keep the communication chanel neutrally open.
F. Follow advise 2 from above positively and be bold here and ask straight way a question.

all the best.

1 Like

Parth Chandra (none)     25 June 2010

Arun Kumar Sir....too humorous person you really are....u bring laugh on the face of a serious person like me as well with your replies.


Littlepoor (Engineer)     25 June 2010

Sorry to deny your view, he guided me well but also trying to make out this marriage on. I respect him much and also the profession. On the other hand, wife is not replying at all for anything. She is not ready to accept, it seems to be and also nor to say no. Already my parents and me are dipressed a lot. Please clarify me about CAW cell activity.


Parth Chandra (none)     25 June 2010


The act of wife indicates a possibility that she might be loving someone else but because of the pressure of their family members or some other reasons, She married to you. This may not be true but is a possibility as she did not allow s*x to you since one year now and not seems to be interested in u.

I am not sure about CAW cell...and its possible that you may not be approached by them at all but in case of 498a, directly police may knock your door (this has what happened in my case, CAW cell did not come into picture...direct arrest).

The point Arun Kumar Ji was making is...since they have not filed any case yet...Try to be polite and in touch with Parent in Laws as they holds the keys in almost all cases. So be in talking terms with them.

1 Like

Arup (UNEMPLOYED)     25 June 2010

taking time twice is quite natural.

wait a month more and see wheather respondent replies or not.

if in next date reply not filed, request the court for exparty, whic will creat pressure and to avoid exparty, respondent will reply.

be easy with your sr advocate. you have the right to ask him about your case but ofcourse gently and pleasently.

2 Like

Arup (UNEMPLOYED)     25 June 2010

cruelty against women cell, mostly blackmail the males. it is almost a part of police.

2 Like

Littlepoor (Engineer)     25 June 2010

Actually I filed a case on 4th week of April. Got the first hearing on 7th June, which their lawyer asked for a date. Then Second time for 21st June, which got postponed by lawyer strike. Now got the next hearring date as 2nd July. What is the maximum time limit to do like this by them?, is there anything like that? or their lawyer will keep on asking dates without any reply?



Ok some serious stuff now, so that 'PC' takes me seriously now; :-)

1. RCR is powerful Section of HMA which is like a 'shocker' as well as 'shock absorber' in early phases of a ‘relationship” used by both sides at any given point of time.

2. If a Husband files for RCR then it signals to a wife OK bygone is bygone let us start fresh and in some cases flip signal HE gives is that OK no act of even God can compel you to live with me so I have signaled activity in FC (Family Court) rest you sail me through means divorce or MCD with give and take of stridhan mostly it is give and give and more give.

3. Now, if a wife files for RCR then it signals that she is cautioning husband to mend his ways and accept her as a 'whole package' without your dustbin (means without your parents staying at your matrimonial home) and in rare to rare cases flip signal given is that SHE says OK  I am showing to FC (Family Court) my good conduct and now rest ball is in your court and be prepared for rest of the IPC and CrPC sections to follow soon. She means honest about all these.

4.  So, serious answer to your question rests in
Para 1. Now if she would have sent you a RCR Notice would you not have taken your sweet time to consult inner self and peers / family / relatives / LCI members before replying / acting upon it kya?. So this is what she is probably doing may be there might be still chances of re-union which other side may be thinking and giving you space to think about it too and not treat RCR plaint as some 10 pages document only.

5. CAW Cell is an 'Women only Activity Cell' created under pressure from WCD Ministry by Police HQ in respective States to mediate husband and wife’s mending affairs before serious sections of IPC are gassed upon husband and his side of family (means arrest without giving chance to plead your innocence) and such arrests includes a family pet dog to a 7 days old newborn child (it is a Limca Book of Record matter believe me of youngest arrest of a human being in a matrimonial cases and that can only happen in India) and instances of such shocking news are plenty from various States collectively.

6. On my comment upon your Sr. Advocate you took it other way round which my English being poor is bound to happen and I admit my language selection is often poor. What I really meant by THAT syntax is that a Sr. Advocate brings in loads of wide area of experience / expertise and if a litigant who hires a Sr. Advocate can’t even share his “anxiety” with him freely then what I said earlier I still believe in it and it I will be disrespect to a Sr. Advocate dealings his clients if he can’t make his client less tense that also for an RCR case. So long explanation in short, I take back my
Para 1 and convey my apology to him if it cools some heat here and there.

I think you are from Chennai so review https://www.chennaicitypolice.tn.gov.in/crimewomen.htm

Ops, BTW, Yoga, meditation and saying one postiive sentence a day heals depression try it at home with family and see the results.

Anything else brother just whistle this great interactive platform is at your call reasonably as always.

PS.: Where I have mentioned 'you' in above gyan it means generic and not meant for you, so kindly don't pounce back, keep cool, things will be allright, have faith in your relationship, if you did good in relationship you will receive good back.

2 Like

Littlepoor (Engineer)     25 June 2010

FYI, I did not get any dowry and also Stridhan. I have all home appliances like Refridgerator, Washing machine, Stove with gas connection....2 wheeler... etc., with me. Even the few gold which they gave like bracelet, chain, ring..., I gave to her.. not for this purpose.. but asked to keep her safely with her.


G. ARAVINTHAN (Legal Consultant / Solicitor)     27 June 2010

on next hearing date, disclose your feeling to Presiding officer that you have not even touched her from day one.

Littlepoor (Engineer)     29 June 2010

I have mentioned that too in my legal notice and also while file filing the case. Now I want to know, what could be the possible reply or counter to me on this case. please help me out. This Friday 02-07-2010 is next hearring, but my lawyer said, I no need to come in person, also I am working in Bangalore.

Littlepoor (Engineer)     09 July 2010

As said, I am working in Bangalore, till now there is no reply from the girl' family. Our case first hearing was on 7th june since then, they are getting dates to postpone as far as possible. Next hearing date is on 22nd July. If they come for compromise, I planning to ask her to stay in my native along with my parents, so that I can go 3days weekly to my native and can take care of my parents and her, already I am travelling week end, also I am having option to work from home (as my company facility allows). I cannot allow her to stay with me in Bangalore for few months or atleast 1 year, since she went already without my notice to chennai ( her home) and she is not willing to leave her job and also not accepting to have child. What can I do at this situation, pls help me. Experts advice needed urgently


Littlepoor (Engineer)     19 July 2010

Dear Experts... need your advise... my next hearring date is coming.on 22nd .thursday.. please advise...at this situation.. thanks for the great help


Renuka Gupta ( Gender Researcher )     19 July 2010

Mr. Arun Kumar,

Your English is very good and your replies are often written in a very coherent  and well organised manner. Yes, senior lawyers sometimes do not even let you speak, not that all senior lawyers behave in the same manner. But some do and make you more depressed than you actually are! So nothing wrong in having a review of your lawyer and engaging one with whom you are more open, who can listen to you and discuss with you without making you feel uncomfortable in anyway.


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