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tired and exhausted (Production Manager)     06 July 2014

Need urgent advice/ guidance for divorce

Dear Experts need urgent advice/suggestion and legal opinion 


Myself and my wife are staying apart for a year after a fight last June 2013, as she was using abusive language and F words in front of my parents and on repeated request not to use that kind of language she did not stop but she was adamant used all kind of fowl language.. After cool down i tried and reconcile to her in front of my parents.. She has been quite abusive with me and with my parents and her family people are never ready to believe that she has behaved bad even after my parents tell them.. They have out rightly refused to accept that their daughter is at fault and always blamed me for everything.. Since my parents were travelling to US and thinking that in their absence things can go bad and after having a word with her family asked her to go for sometime to Bangalore and stay there and once they are back she should come back.. She took up a job there and i have visited her 3 times between Sept 2013 to Feb 2014 to make things work and asking her to move back.. She said she will get some experience and come back.. But she has become very adamant and has decided to stay put and not to return. About 2 days back when we asked them if she is not coming back we shall go for divorce my in laws agreed that since we are not compatible we should part mutually.. they asked my parents that i should speak to them personally which i did and now for some reason they have refused to go in for divorce and have told me i can take any step i want and they shall respond to it.. I tried speaking to my wife and reasoning her but she says i wont come back neither i will divorce  you..


For some reason they want me to come to Bangalore and meet them in person but my family members are afraid that they may try and physically harm me or put a case against me once i m there.. Their logic of calling me to Bangalore is that since we got married there and i went all the way for marriage from Delhi i should be personally be present there and tell them i want divorce.. We are not able to understand the logic behind it and why are the so insistent.. 


Want to know in this case can we or should we go for Restitution of Conjual rights? or we directly go in for filing divorce.. we would like to work this out amicably and get out of it without getting into mess.. also after some research on net i got to know that there is a Mediation dept in High Court Delhi which helps in mediation and tries to work out things without confronting.. can you please suggest what should i do to safeguard myself and my family from 498a.. any advice, help, suggestion will be more than welcome.. I sincerely need to get out of this mess without getting into any legal mess... 


 6 Replies



Enough of US, bangalore, and your so called logic drama.

Two options you have.

Either listen to what your wife says, just accept her nakhras, tantrums, her parents nakhras etc and dance to her and her parents tunes without complaining for the rest of your life, only if you want marital life to be peaceful.

Dont want to listen to her whims and fancies?

Just file RCR in local court, notice will be served and then you have still 2 choices, 1 to accept her back or 2, to file divorce.

After applying for divorce, she may contest it, if she does, then 6-7 years gone with the wind.  + incentives, pay alimony, face cases like dowry case, ie 498a, domestic violence case, do time behind bars [that includes your mom n dad + any relatives], and then yet pay her money while divorce case is on and also pay her money after you get divorce.  If she does not contest the divorce case, you apply for MCD and you will be free man in 6 months time, be prepared to pay her lumpsum money for your freedom.

And cut the drama will you?  Drama suits females, not males.  

Good luck.


PS: No safegaurding with regard to 498a DV etc, its India and you married a indian woman you fool.

tired and exhausted (Production Manager)     07 July 2014

Thanks for your reply.. with your answer it seems like you have been hired by my wife and in laws... Thanks for your advice and i shall think about it.. 

498 A fighter (Advocate)     07 July 2014

Helping hand advice you in best way, according to you he may be hired by your wife but i am sufferre from my wife

so i advice you to follow the above mention process at least to safe guard your self

and remember i am not hired by your wife and in laws

choice is yours otherwise we will meet you agian with the queries related to 498A,DV,125 etc etc....

tired and exhausted (Production Manager)     07 July 2014

Thank you Helping Hand! and 498a Fighter.. no offense to any one.. the answer is so precise that i made me think that my wife or her family has replied to my queries... i totally agree with Helping Hand! and looking to see some lawyer and seek his advice.. 498a can you please share what you have been thru if you dont mind.. hopefully it might help me...


@Querist: No issues..

Drink Boost, not likker, you need to have lots of strength from here on.

One thing you have to understand, what i've explained above are the only options available for you.  Go to any lawyer, they have only this much to offer.  Even if my wife does something like this, I dont have any options myself than to face it, the way it comes.

These words nobody will tell you.  

All this case etc will go on and on, with no end until it actually ends the way i have described, but apart from this there is life, and you only have  to live it.  Water finds its own way.  Am sure you will too find your way out of this, all things cannot be settled in court, and waiting for Indian court verdict is a waste of time.  Hope my message is clear n loud.

You can call me if you want.

Sandeep Hegde(89 717 84 550) (Advocate)     30 July 2014


Do not directly walk in to their trap. As suggested by helping hand they may implicate in false criminal cases. Exchange emails about your discussion and plan of action. Have one advocate to liason on your behalf about conciliation/settlement or in case of false complaint. If there is any settlement you can opt for Mid. 

Good luck.




Sandeep Hegde

Advocate and Consultants


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