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Ujjvala28   17 June 2017

Divorce with mutual consent having a child

Hello,, I am a Christian girl. I've been married since last 2.5 yrs with a Christian guy. But after our marriage we had some very serious issues. He had mentally and emotionally abused me so I left his house after 8 months, we lived separately for 6 months. By then we hired an advocate and started for divorce procedure but he apologized and signed an agreement in which he was agree to change and not to do things he has done in the past. So we got back together. But then again he started doing everything he used to do. So after living for 3 months with him I again returned to my parents house and later I found out that I am pregnant. I stayed at my parents house throughout pregnancy and delivered baby girl here. I have 6 months old daughter. I don't feel safe with my husband thus I don't want to return now. My husband too wants divorce. We both want to get separated. And he is ready to give my daughter's custody to me. What are the chances of getting divorce with mutual consent in Christian marriage act? How long it will take to get divorce in our case? Please help. Thanks.


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 13 Replies

Ms.Usha Kapoor (CEO)     17 June 2017

Its better to part ways rather than staying in an abusive marriage with child or without child. MCD takes minimum 6 months. If  the Judge is convinced about your irreconcilable differences, incompatibilty etc after 1st hearing only he may grant divorce by mutual consent.

1 Like

{Balu manikantan} SUBRAMANYAM (Practising Advocate)     17 June 2017

From which state in india you are from as according to 

Section 10A in THE DIVORCE ACT, 1869
10A Dissolution of marriage by mutual consent. —
(1) Subject to the provisions of this Act and the rules made thereunder, a petition for dissolution of marriage may be presented to the District Court by both the parties to a marriage together, whether such marriage was solemnized before or after the commencement* of the Indian Divorce (Amendment) Act, 2001, on the ground that they have been living separately for a period of two years or more, that they have not been able to live together and they have mutually agreed that the marriage should be dissolved.
(2) On the motion of both the parties made not earlier than six months after the date of presentation of the petition referred to in sub-section (1) and not later than eighteen months after the said date, if the petition is not withdrawn by both the parties in the meantime, the Court shall, on being satisfied, after hearing the parties and making such inquiry, as it thinks fit, that a marriage has been solemnized and that the averments in the petition are true, pass a decree declaring the marriage to be dissolved with effect from the date of decree.]
 
But high courta in few states has reduced the period so check it with your advocate. Also let us know whether your husband is paying maintenance to you and your child if not immediately apply for the same.But i advice to think thrice before going for a divorce keeping the future of the child in mind......good luck.

{Balu manikantan} SUBRAMANYAM (Practising Advocate)     19 June 2017

Section 10A in THE DIVORCE ACT, 1869 10A Dissolution of marriage by mutual consent. — (1) Subject to the provisions of this Act and the rules made thereunder, a petition for dissolution of marriage may be presented to the District Court by both the parties to a marriage together, whether such marriage was solemnized before or after the commencement* of the Indian Divorce (Amendment) Act, 2001, on the ground that they have been living separately for a period of two years or more, that they have not been able to live together and they have mutually agreed that the marriage should be dissolved. (2) On the motion of both the parties made not earlier than six months after the date of presentation of the petition referred to in sub-section (1) and not later than eighteen months after the said date, if the petition is not withdrawn by both the parties in the meantime, the Court shall, on being satisfied, after hearing the parties and making such inquiry, as it thinks fit, that a marriage has been solemnized and that the averments in the petition are true, pass a decree declaring the marriage to be dissolved with effect from the date of decree.]   But high courts of few states has reduced the period

 

Ujjvala28   20 June 2017

Thank you all for replying. @Rohini A. Bopaiah: We both are facing a lot of understanding issues. Not a single time we both have agreed on common solution. I don't want to raise my daughter in such chaotic and qurrelsome environment. Thus we both have decided to get separated. And who knows till the time my daughter reaches the age of getting married people would be more accepting and open-minded. It would be silly to raise a child in an ABUSIVE family than raising alone. I know what I'm capable of without my husband. Love is gone from our lives long ago. So thanks for the advice but after thinking hundreds of hours on this, ultimate solution is divorce only.

simara   21 June 2017

"UJJVALA 28"

Just go for it if your heart says so, make sure he gives you compensation ie. maintenance as a one time settlement...dont agree for anything less... i was exactly at the same phase as urs, so i have file for MCD too, its no hustle as long as both of u agree to the T&C.

ANd if u dont want ypur daughter to have anything to do with him, get his lawyer or him write in the MCD that he agrees witht the full custody of daughter...

its better if no visitation rights is given, as it wud be difficult for you n ur daughter....

as im in overseas, he didnt ask for visitation rights at all, and agreed for the custody of my daughter to me only.

take care and all the best....we womens should know best whats gd for us...there no such thing as LOVE nowadays in this mean world....its rare...species....

 

 

simara   21 June 2017

"UJJVALA 28"

Just go for it if your heart says so, make sure he gives you compensation ie. maintenance as a one time settlement...dont agree for anything less... i was exactly at the same phase as urs, so i have file for MCD too, its no hustle as long as both of u agree to the T&C.

ANd if u dont want ypur daughter to have anything to do with him, get his lawyer or him write in the MCD that he agrees witht the full custody of daughter...

its better if no visitation rights is given, as it wud be difficult for you n ur daughter....

as im in overseas, he didnt ask for visitation rights at all, and agreed for the custody of my daughter to me only.

take care and all the best....we womens should know best whats gd for us...there no such thing as LOVE nowadays in this mean world....its rare...species....

 

 

Ujjvala28   23 June 2017

Thank you @simara! I really appreciate your advice and will keep in mind for th same. How long did it take in your case?

simara   23 June 2017

"@ Ujjvala28"

 

I submitted my mutual consent in early Feb 2017, and after 6 months which is Aug 2017 (2nd Motion), hopefully everything will be settled if both parties agrees and have no objection to any term and conditions....then the divorce will be granted....after the 2nd motion itself.

Born Fighter (xxx)     23 June 2017

Ujjvala28, u have not stated what problems u faced in ur marriage. Ur husband wud also be posting similar threads in some other forums and blaming you for the failure in marriage. Marriage needs lots of patience and adjustment from both sides. Majority of divorces happen between 1-3yrs of marriage and in many cases the divorces reaches court after birth of first child.  Also there is no perfect marriage, u can see that only in movies.

Im no one to judge the situation and i do not know what exactly happened. But i can only advice you to think hard about the future of the child. If you force ur husband to give up visitation rights (against his wishes) , be prepared ur child might do the same with you when she grows up.  Let the differences between u and ur spouse does not ruin the well being of the child. Child needs both parents, its not a property that can be purchased or taken away from the husband.

 

Have a dignified exit in the relationship without harming the future of the child !!

simara   23 June 2017

in my case my husband told me to let go of my daughter he will pay me a gdd maintenace, and only he wants her for herself. and i should not have anyright.

so i let go everything, and they only paid me the sum that been spent on our marriage . thats all...

but i got my daughter.y should one compromise for everything, if the husband loves the child he should also love the mother and bear with the situaitons.

Ujjvala28   23 June 2017

@Born Fighter, "Divorce" was the most horrified term for me until I decided to go for it. I have had my chances to compromise and continue the marital bliss. But at one point it was only me who was adjusting and compromising. As you said, "Marriage needs lots of patience and adjustment from both sides." He did NOTHING which can make me stay in this relationship. Instead he continued doing everything he said he won't do. For eg. Smoking (excessively), Drinking, Gambling money, Keeping an affair with his ex-girlfriend, Letting his mother decide each and everything in our house (be it cooking or buying a car), Partying with his friends every weekend, Never going out anywhere with me, Paying his debts from my salary and renting my gold jewellery etc. FYI, I adjusted with him by compromising above mentioned things. Moreover after my daughter was born he didn't give a single penny to me since last 6 months. Never asked me about her health or well being or how am I bringing her up. I think he doesn't deserve any sort of visitation. I'm sure when my daughter grows up and asks me about her father I'll tell her the truth. After knowing how much her father cared for her she will understand why I get apart from him. The points I mentioned are just overviews, if I will go into details then I don't know how long essay it will be. Before thinking about divorce I also offered him to visit a marriage counsellor but he denied. So now I don't have any other option than this.

simara   28 June 2017

"UJJVALA28" I agree with you decision and i respect it.

women should not compromise with their self respect....because later in future your daughter or son will have the same faith as you coz you did not do anything for ur self respect. 

so in order for our children to be brought the right way...the seeds that we sow should be positive and of encouragement tothe rigth path...

im glad you desiced the right thing got urself n ur daughter.

Ujjvala28   29 June 2017

@simara: Thank you very much. I am obliged. My main concern is that only. I don't want my daughter to see me compromising every now and then with my self respect. So I had this conclusion. It wasn't easy but I had to.

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