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Divorce to be filed

Page no : 2


@ Mona

Father is in USA and so is the child. Indian custody orders and alimony orders will NOT be valid in US.

You are making a HUGE mistake by isolating yourself across international jurisdiction. Father can VERY EASILY get full custody of the child and get the court to order you to pay child support, as you are the Non Custodial party.

That you dont have a job will be NO EXCUSE for you to not pay child support to the father of the child. Once child support kicks in and you are behind by $2500, all agencies across US are notified about you - your drivers license is suspended, you cannot exit or enter the country. Very serious matter. 

Here is what you can do to show good will and that you are not a RUNAWAY.

1. Make a prayer to the court of the domestic situation. If you mention that you were financially abused, Court will give you relief and have a soft-er corner for you. You dont need any proof - your testimony is enough.

2. Request court for joint legal and joint physical. This will protect your rights as a mother and parent. There is a technicality - if you are have joint legal and joint physical, the child support amount would be far less. 

I can help you draft the above petitions guide you to file the papers in the US court. 

Abandoning Spouse and abandoning child can be treated as criminal case in US. 

As a tip, do not buy any travel tickets for your child, apply for Indian passport or touch any childs travel documents. An intent to procure or use childs travel document can be used against you and you could lose 100% custody of your child - potential parental kidnapping. It has happened to several Indian moms in the US. 

Originally posted by :Nadeem Qureshi 9953809956, 925
Dear Mona

if you want to punish him, you can file a criminal case against him under section 498A, IPC and file a case for maintinence & Parmanent Alimony under section 125 Crpc,  section 24 & Section  25 of Hindu Marriage Act, 1955you can also filed a case for your son's custody under section 26 Of Hindu Marriage Act, 1955.

Feel Free to call

What a Set of Irony  ! ! ! ..........This is it??

Now I wonder why we have so many 498a Cases.......

4 Like


@ Zameer

In this particular case, with whatever little Mona has posted, I feel sympathetic towards Mona. Quite a few Indian men who marry from India and come to US lose interest in their "house wife material" wife. These men feel inferior compared to the double income families and start finding avenues to get rid of the "housewife". It is rare but I do know a few cases personally. 

Now, coming to your comment above, dont worry, time will take care of 498 incited by lawyers. Didnt we read a post recently on LCI that the respondent went and broke the hands and legs of the other parties advocate. 

In another case in Chennai, I learnt that an all the 10 digits of the advocates hands were broken and the wifes fathers knee cap was fractured. The false DV case was removed in 2 days. 

In a country of more than a billion people with severe poverty in pockets, an advocate or any other person can go so far with their legal attrocities. There is a severe threat to such advocates lives. As a matter of fact, I would like 498 to be amended such that it provides safety to the participating advocates, especially the advocate who is representing the 498 petition.  

Since internet has made this earth flat, word about good advocates who practice family law with the intent of preserving  family peace and yet settling matters between the parties before litigating will spread and the public will  soon  be able to separate the grain from chaff. My biggest concern is the life and limb of the chaff advocates. 

Self service (None)     26 January 2012

Story is incomplete and doubtful...what is your status? Citizen or visa? After spending 8 years in US you must be knowing US laws. Why you need divorce? Don't take desi advices you won't get any thing. Any way if your son is US citizen you won't get his custody too without job in India.

I don't see that your husband forced you to come back or any thing. If you have any issue sort out otherwise you will loose every thing and any way all desi jhatke don't work in US. Go back ...

2 Like

Self service (None)     26 January 2012

Adam is correct follow his are responsbile for child support. You can not run away and ask money, even Indian Supreme Court has given such decisions...

And what if US agencies take your child ...? Then you will cry on desi media that US govt snatched kid...

1 Like

Agneepath (Software Engineer)     26 January 2012


Dear Nadeem Qureshi, 
Do you understand what is 498a? 

The question is not about sympathy and who is right in marriage. Mr. Nadeem Qureshi is directly suggesting Mona to COMMIT A CRIME, which is punishable by several of IPCs. It is as simple as that (and husbands these days leave no stone unturned to try to do it). Remember, the husband might be a rapist, a dacoit, a professional killer, or even a terrorist, but may not be a Dowry Harasser. He MAY NOT HAVE forced her wife with an unlawful demand for money or driven her to suicide. So in that case, HE HAS NOT COMMITTED 498a. Hence, wife MUST not file 498a, howsoever sympathetic her conditions may seem. If she is slapped by his husband daily, and she is not forced to suicide, even then it does not deserve a 498a, even though it could be punisahable by the Domestic Violence Act. There is a reason we have "sections" of IPC and not one giant section for all crimes, "498a -The wedding gift". 

By the way, do you expect that such a woman will ever exist who wants divorce and comes on this forum and says : "Hello, I have a boyfriend with whom I have s*x daily outside my marriage. But the problem is my poor, innocent, educated and godsend husband, who though is very kind and caring to me, comes to home daily from office and hence I am afraid I cannot do *it* as much as I want. I know I am cheating, and due to this reason, I am afraid of the society. So I want to file for divorce taking these things into account, even if court does not grant me maintenance MONEY".  - It just doesn't happen. This is just an example(not related to the present case in any manner). EVERY woman who needs divorce would say she was (at least) "mentally tortured'. 

Also, NRI dumping wives, and "getting bored with their wives" is all bullsh*t. They have grown up in the same Indian society as well, and are well educated, and more responsible some illiterate ones who'd cheat with their wives daily in India. Media have set such a cruel image of NRIs (as if they are some separate cruel species) which it is unfathomable. 

Good luck to this fraternity who keeps on suggesting filing false cases for their personal gains and destroy Indian family.

@Moderator, it's a request, please don't delete Mr. Nadeem's comment from here too (like you did from some other thread) in an attempt to hide the fact that lawyers openly suggest filing false cases.

3 Like

Anon (EFG)     27 January 2012

@mona. False 498a case it a strong ground for divorce. 498a should be proved beyond reasonable doubt. ie your husband will get benefit of doubt. Even with strong proof its difficult to prove 498a. If your husband fits back you are screwed. Conviction rate in 498a is 2%. ie 98% get acquitted. Most Judges know that 498a cases are false and they will make you run behind court for 4-5 years. Many Lawyers give wrong advice just to make money. At end of 5 years you would have lost money, time apart from your husband & child.
3 Like

Dhaval (Engineer)     27 January 2012

Nadeem and mona , may god burn you in hell . 

Scrape gender biased laws of india to stop its misuse. They are overwhelingly biased towards females. , punish all b*tches and their lawyers. Indian husbands need change and it will come one day for sure.

Respect rights of husbands. No mainteneance until cruelty proven, Maintenance law must be gender neutral. 



1 Like

Shonee Kapoor (Legal Evangelist - TRIPAKSHA)     27 January 2012



Contested divorce takes a long time. 


Yes, you are eligible to get maintenance from your husband. However, first make up your mind, what you want to take now from this marriage, as it is seeminglt dead.






Shnee Kapoor

2 Like

Shantanu Wavhal (Worker)     27 January 2012


I strongly feel - same as following view is expressed by Mr. Nadeen Qureshi.


I believe that - in no way - Mr. Nadeem Qureshi has suggested the author to MISUSE the law.



My understanding of 498a & DV act


Please correct me wherever I am wrong.

Procedure of 498a :

1) Complaint is filed by wife at CAW cell.

2) CAW cell '‘requests'’ husband + in laws & hands over a copy of written complaint of wife.

3) Husband is not legally bound to attend.

4) Husband side files their answer to the complaint.

5) Mediation efforts are done by CAW cell. (both the sides are given a chance to reconcile.)

6) If mediation fails & sufficient substance is found in wife’s complaint, FIR is filed.

7) Unending WAR starts.


Not all but a considerable number of wives are subjected to cruelty.


Shouldn’t such wives resort to the said provision, after they have made sufficient efforts for changing the attitude of torturing husband and in laws ??

Resorting to 498a first gives a chance to wife & husband to settle the dispute amicably.

For the wife, whose husband & in laws are not ready to change their tyrannous behavior at home, CAW cell offers mediation.

So dispute can be resolved even before filing FIR with the help of 498a. Can this be called a misuse of 498a ??


If a wife, aggrieved by husbands cruelty properly resorts to 498a can it be called misuse ??



Same is true with DV.


DV offers civil relifs to wife if she is driven out of house or is not provided for her basic needs.

If such a aggrieved wife properly resorts to DV, will that be called misuse ??



Human (MRA)     27 January 2012

Mona, as most of the other experts have already suggested to you, litigations help neither the respondent nor the accused but only help the lawyers (logical and true).

So most of the people around you may be pumping you up with various options of filing divorce and while they may keep uttering about "alleged" cruelty done to you but at the back of their mind, they all are having eyes on enjoying the bar-be-que at the fire on your marriage.

You had a love marriage, you also converted yourself and your husband did accept you and you accepted him. There was complete love in the marriage. After 4 years of your marriage, you both decided to even have a kid and that shows that love was still there in the marriage till 4 years.

Arent you over reacting with the set of issues you have? Dont they really sound trivial? You may be told by so many people around you that you made such huge sacrifices for him ............ but I am sorry, you made sacrifices towards your marriage and if you can think with a cool mind, so did he. He is working his A** off in the offices for last 8 years so that he can give a good life to all 3 of you. And he does it without making any complaints to you or showing that he is doing it because of you. Then why are you thinking like that?

It is not easy to separate from the one you love and it will be very enjoying for every one except 3 of you.

I have not even brought the topic of your son who is life for both of you (hence neither did he let him part from him, nor can you stop thinking about him while being in India).

Showing money power? Is this an issue or is it an over reading?

If you have issues, both of you could goto marriage councellors, psychiatrists to discuss your issues.

Take steps to ensure that it works properly rather than taking a call of "enough is enough".

And all those intelligent people who treat your case like a "assumed NRI marriage" case, please remember that IF HE REALLY WANTED TO GET RID OF YOU, HE COULD HAVE TAKEN THE ACTION FOR IT BY NOW.

None of you want separation and hence please dont let others misguide you about your OWN PERSONAL family life.

Get some real real proper thinking, sit alone and ponder over 3 years before marriage and 4 years after marriage .......... I am sure that you will do well.

1 Like


but she is asking how to get her child back...nobody is interested to reply that..

Shantanu Wavhal (Worker)     27 January 2012

the party demanding child custody has to convince the court that the party is more competent wrt the child welfare, as compared to the opponant.

Human (MRA)     27 January 2012

Dhinka Chika ............ we can keep discussing about breaking the marriage and fighting for custody. Please tell me one good that it will do to her, him, kid?

If she can come out of unnecessary assumptions of thinking financial discussion as boasting from her husband and look at life in a larger picture, she may not have to fight at all and Indian laws will not have the blame of breaking another family.

Dont you think so?

Dhaval (Engineer)     27 January 2012

I don't know from where have you gathered steps of 498a procedures but it has no truth and no legal value. 

dowry is more than 50 year old concept and it is almost vanished nowadays. 

When 498a is filed police generally arrests immediately without any investigation and they are bribed by wives   side heavily to do the arrest. There are thousands of cases if you every try to find. Nowadays the only reason to file these 99% of false 498a is to throw husband and inlaws behind bars, satisfy ego, harras them or extort money. Wife does not have represent any proof of any kind of harrasment or demand of money. I think you should experience it from you wife and see how it feels to be behind bars for crime you never committed. I am sure you will change your point of views in once minute only. I pray god and your wife to do this with you. 

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