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vanshika (Engineer)     15 January 2015

Demands in the name of custom

Hi,

I got married 1 year ago. After 6 months of marriage, my husband and his family demanded following items in the name of religious custom:

1. Gold item for my husband.

2. Shoes, clothes for my husband.

3. Clothes for all his family members - mother, father, sister, grandmother ( maternal and paternal)

4. 11 KG sweets

5. basket of fruits

6. 5 KG dry fruits each.

Now again they are demanding the same things, in the name of religious custom.

My mother in law has been threatening me and my father that she would get me divorced.

I am a working professional, and my husband has been asking me to pay him rent and money for food, else he would divorce me.

 

Please let me know if their demands are valid; and if invalid, what can be done.



Learning

 4 Replies

Kappil Cchandna (Expert Bail & Criminal Defence Lawyer at Delhi Supreme Court of India)     15 January 2015

Dear, Its a dowry but no custom .... Better say that u cant afford their unjustified demands and tell them if they don't stop this u file a case against them .... Kapil Chandna Adv 9899011450

(Guest)

As you are working woman, you will not be entitled to get alimony, you may but the condition would be huge income disparity between yours and his.


Filing demand of dowry case on husband and co for the above said items will look foolish and wont stand in court of law.

If husband is asking you to cough up money for running the show, nothing wrong in it, if it were like this, almost all would end up going to court, saying that husband asked me money to pay house rent.


Your husbands threat to you that he will go for divorce is absolutely non-sensical as is your complaints of he asking you money for rent or your MIL threatening you that she will get you divorced.


It takes lot of patience, little money, love and affection in other things along with respect for each other to run a marriage.  Ask your parents to talk to your in-laws, you personally talk to your husband and sort out the differences, main player here is your husband, rest of them are secondary.  Think and make a move.

vanshika (Engineer)     15 January 2015

Hi, Thanks for your input. I have been paying the rent and contributing equally in every expense - may it be vacation / rent / food etc - for first six months. But later i came to know that my husband has given all his savings to his parents. This is the only reason I wished to save some money for my pregnancy and some savings for future. I have been trying in every way to help him out but he does not bother about household needs and necessities - forget about my desires / needs. 

All he cares for is that I should be paying him money, and my parents should be gifting him and his family every now and then. I even took a personal loan for this marriage, which I am paying from my pocket, but he doesnot care about that too.

My issue is that he doesnot seem interested or invested in this marriage, and even when I was paying rent and giving gifts, he always had some or the other complaint with me and my family.

 

This marriage is not working out, I need help and guidance.

 

 

498 A fighter (Advocate)     15 January 2015

You are the responsibility of your husband and your child is also her responsiblity, so why you are worrying and creating dispute/ confusion.

let the situation comes, if your in laws wont help you then you go to your father and mohter and then think for your relation to continue or not to continue.

Now as per salary you earning let them give some partial ammount and some save for your self.

If the preson either your mother father of your In laws will not help you in your truouble then think to breake sometime it happens whom you think wrong person he helps you when you really need help. so forget about little money and concentrate to save marriage and build relations,

kabhi kabhi jada paane ke liye thoda khona me koi harz nahi

aisa samjho ke Lions ka shikar karne ke liye aap bakre ko kharch kar rahe ho.

your husband is say Lion and your little ammount is like bakra so pay to satisfy his wish.

without knowing real facts and only by asuumstion you will spoil your marriage and family life..

if some thing other is going on in your mind then useless to say anything either legal/socila/personel... wish is yours... All the experts here are for good to querist.


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