Facing problem in the first month of marriage
krishna123
(Querist) 16 April 2014
This query is : Resolved
Hello Experts,
I have a very serious issue regarding my elder brother's marriage.
My brother got married in March 2014 after-mid month. First time when we met their family, they gave us the wrong DOB of the girl as 1983 year (actually its 1979). My brother age is 1980. So she is elder than my brother. This we get to know after the marriage i.e. after 25 days of marriage, not even a month completed.
Since marriage day, she stayed with our family for only 12 days; remaining days she stayed at her own house with family as part of culture.
So, the problem is:
1. They have cheated us about the Date of Birth.
2. She doesn't know/show any responsibility towards family, husband or household activities.
3. She doesn't move closely with family members nor with my brother.
4. She is very dominant in all ways.
5. A small thing i would like to share, she never touch my brother legs when my brother gets pain. She says i won't touch your legs.
From the above issues, we doesn't want to continue with her. Our family is not happy with her and her behavior.
We need your help urgently.
Apologize for my poor communication.
Devajyoti Barman
(Expert) 16 April 2014
Looks like earlier marital understanding.
These are petty issues can easily be tackles if the couple sit together and have a frank talk.
Do not think of legal recourse right now.
krishna123
(Querist) 16 April 2014
Thank you Barman.
Not even a month completed of marriage she is behaving like this and also they have gave us wrong date of birth which is elder to my brother age.
How can we continue with this. Cant we get separated and move life further.
We only wanted now is how to separate with their family.
If in case, both got separated then my brother would be consider as unmarried. Because its not even a month gone for marriage.
Devajyoti Barman
(Expert) 16 April 2014
Marriage even for a day does not change the status.
I would not recommend for dissolution of marriage.
Since marriage is not one year old, divorce suit is unlikely.
Your option is nullity u/s 12 of HMA.
It takes time and result is not coming anytime soon.
Meet a lawyer.
krishna123
(Querist) 16 April 2014
Hello Sir
Sorry for the name.
When i sign up i got this admin by default.
Will change the name.
Rajendra K Goyal
(Expert) 17 April 2014
The marriage has occurred. They have cheated on date of birth. The adjustment between the two may occur sooner or later. Age one year more is not a big issue.
On the other hand if you proceed for divorce, your brother is about 34 years and even MCD would take aprox. 2 years and contested divorce may take 5-6 years with other associated cases on family members also. Will you afford such important years of the life of your brother in such litigation? Better wait and watch for one year.
krishna123
(Querist) 17 April 2014
Hello Rajendra,
Its ok with one year age difference.
Can you please tell me what is MCD?
And one more problem here is We are Hindus and we believe in astrology and marriage muhurtam dates according to their birth dates (her DOB is 1983 and my brother age is 1980) at initially based on that our pantulu gave us the marriage date as 19 Mar 2014.
Here the muhurtham dates and timings will be changed (actual age of her is 1979 year) and also it affects the whole things i.e. marriage muhurtham dates, girls horoscope, lagna rasi, birth rasi, etc.. .
So, whole
Biswanath Roy
(Expert) 17 April 2014
You shall have to pay for your own fault. You are thinking about yours only , why don't you think about the life of an unfortunate lady whom you have brought down as a victim of your own deeds or misdeeds, be that whatever? Try to settle up differences by a mutual conversation with bride's family.
ajay sethi
(Expert) 17 April 2014
you have been married only one month and you want divorce . your brother if he had any doubts about her age should have asked for her school leaving certificate or her birth certificate .
you have to be married for one 1 yar before you file for divorce . only in exceptional circumstances can you move for divorce within one year.
it is not necessary that wife should touch her husband feet . we are in 21st century now . learn to change with times
Guest
(Expert) 17 April 2014
March 2014 (nerely a month's time) of marriage is not so long period to be the deciding factor about introduction of a new member in the family.
Non-verification of girl's particulars before marriage cannot be attributed to anyone else other than your family members.
While compromise on minor issues, like date of birth, etc., may be in the interest of your brother and other family members, you can expect her adjustment in your family environments only over the passage of time. Your family should not have expected her to adjust in your family environments on the very first day of marriage. Mutual adjustments on the part of both the sides are quite necessary for happy married life. Once married life is disrupted by stubborn attitudes of any of the family members, that cannot be revived easily and becomes a curse for the whole of the family, if not acted wisely on such issues.
malipeddi jaggarao
(Expert) 17 April 2014
The problem is not yours. You can not prevail over your brother simply on the grounds of age. Even it is misrepresented, what is the problem? Sachin Tendulkar is younger to his wife. Marriage muhurtam is for happy living. Though the muhurtam is not fixed basing on the correct date of birth, when they can live happily why do you worry on these petty issues. Nowadays no girl is willing to touch the feet of her husband. There are girls who ask why cannot the husband touch the wife's feet. Allow your borhter is live peacefully with his wife and you people should withdraw from the scene.
Biswanath Roy
(Expert) 17 April 2014
Good and appreciable advises of Learned Mr. Dhingra and Learned Mr. Malipeddi jaggarao in the matter . Try to follow it for your own interests.
Guest
(Expert) 17 April 2014
Incidently, about age difference, the renowned English Poet & Playwrite William Shakespeare's wife Anne Hathaway was 9 years older than him as she was about 27 years of age when she married 18 years old Shakespeare.
T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate
(Expert) 18 April 2014
It is your brother's problem, let him come out with his problem, do not interfere in his family affairs which will ruin his married lief, if possible try to patch up things or reconcile between them instead of blowing things out of proportion. Rest other things have been advised properly by other experts, I agree with their views on the subject issue.
