Advice on family disputes of a newly married couple
sudhir saha
(Querist) 04 May 2016
This query is : Resolved
Two years passed after marriage wife is less interested in daily family/ domestic jobs. she is continuing her education as per pre-marriage agreement.Wife also agreed to do minimum daily family job.She cannot keep her word.If she is reminded , she confess her wrong.Daily she is called for breakfast, lunch , dinner , tea etc. by her aged mother-in-law who does every thing of the family, cooking to washing . She stays upstair.Husband and wife both love each other.But husband is mentally socked for mother's over burden jobs.If he tells to assist his mother for a little job, she does but she cannot accept it mentally. She tells , it hampers her reading.After daily unrest she gives word to do a little job of the family but she forgets after one/ two days.She has no minimum scheduled family job since two years.Due to this , always a long lasting unrest exists in the family.It was reported to her parents who say , gradually she will do every thing as per her capacity after her education , why we are disturbing her.Now we all are in fear , if she is less interested in her duties to family even after her education and for daily verbal unrest created in the family / by other family members ( total four members, husband,wife,mother and father-in-law (both Sr. Citizens)) if she happens any unexpected incident . Please advise what should other family members do in this situation to save from legal harassment in advance without knowledge of others .
Nadeem Qureshi
(Expert) 04 May 2016
Dear Sudhir
First of all try to settled the matter amicably with the help of others relatives and friends and if the thing are not normal and she is not mend her behavior and activities, then send information cum complaint to higher authorities like, National Commission of Women, Chief Justice of High Court and Supreme Court and SSP of area. that information cum complaint should be only for record and not for any action.
Feel Free to Call
Rajendra K Goyal
(Expert) 05 May 2016
Not a legal problem yet, husband and wife like each other, wife is not adamant, doing her studies, parents are helping in routine, only fear for future which is likely to disturb good family life. Study clause of wife agreed before marriage.
If she is studying and want to earn afterwards, you may help her in her target for betterment of future life. You may think to engage domestic help instead of putting marriage on stake.
Dr J C Vashista
(Expert) 08 May 2016
I agree with the expert advise of Mr. Rajendra K Goyal, it is not a legal problem, sort it out.
You and your family had agreed for continuation of her studies at the time of proposal for the marriage then what is the problem at this stage wherein all of you, including your wife, have a win-win situation.
She is not doing any such act which may bring disrepute to your family, isn't it?
Rather you must feel proud of having such an extra-ordinary lady as your wife, who intends to rise in life, academic, respect, love and affection besides all other walks of life consequently coming generation shall also enjoy the fruits of her studies.
sudhir saha
(Querist) 08 May 2016
To
Dr. JC Vashista,
Sir,
You are right but there is saying something to make you clear the matter.We all never expect any job from her.In a rare /special situation she never response to us, she comes down first in morning to take tea / breakfast at 9AM after calling her by calling bell. She always spend the day lonly / out of family members. She on and off says , she dislike to do domestic job. Within two years she never feels to do a little something in absence of house -maid .
Sudhir saha
Dr J C Vashista
(Expert) 09 May 2016
Gradually she will get adapted to her matrimonial obligations and duties, she is new to this house/household, have some patience.
Consult marriage counselor.
sudhir saha
(Querist) 05 October 2016
In continuation to above , After passing MA she became a teacher very recent. she is now two months pregnant.She says , not possible to do any type of domestic job at this position.Husband says if doctor advises for full rest, she will leave service first and then will take rest. In the meantime Her mother-in-law falls ill and on that ground wife's mother takes her at their home. At home she blames to her mother that husband's family treats her as a maid-servant. husband gives her only 500/- for hand expenses and rest amount gives to his mother, not to me. She says ,Father and mother-n-law disturb in their two relations . After hearing this from wife's mother , husband does not take her home. Wife is now with her parents for one month. Wife's family wants own mutual settlement. Husband leaves to go wife's house. Wife now shows rough behaviour through SMS/Whatsapp to Husband not to go at wife's house. In this situation , Is there any fear of criminal case though till date nothing is in His knowledge regarding this. As it was love-marriage on both choice , Father-in-law of son's wife ,a central Govt. pensioner refuses to take both his only son and son's wife at his home to avoid future legal harassment. Husband wants to live both together in a separate place. But Wife does not agree to live with her husband separately other than her father-in-laws' house and wife's mother also does not agree to give her daughter to son-in-law for separate living other than his own house. In this circumstances can husband give divorce to his wife not willing to live with her husband and will it be accepted by court of law. Please give me your valuable advice.
Sudhir saha
